If only I could speak with my heart
Like I so easily do through my art.
But even then it's another language,
And all you see is a blurry image.
-
Every line has an emotion,
But you miss it every time.
Maybe you see a silly notion,
But to me it's my souls commotion.
-
Every color is reflected chaos,
But you can't see that, you see blurs.
You cant see the depth, only strokes and curves.
You ignore the truth to be unearthed.
-
If I painted words on a canvas
Conveying the pain I feel,
I wonder what you would see
If anything to be revealed.
-
Would you still see only a painting
With some "silly little meaning"
Or would you finally understand
The hidden truth remaining?
-
Does it really have to take
Dark ugly greys and reds
To make you pause and wonder
What goes on in my head?
-
Can you not see a painted flower
And wonder why I created it?
Will you just stare at the art
or try to understand the heart behind it?
-
It isn't wilted because the sky is grey;
The flower is exhausted from the day
It hasn't lost its color because it's weak;
it's color is leaving because it's hope is bleak.
-
But all you see is a silly flower...
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
Hello, My Friend!
Hi Sky (or Crimson? Crim? Whichever nickname suits you best)!! I was scrolling through some older works in the Green Room and discovered this gem, and I hoped to give it the attention it deserves with a quick review. Hope you don't mind!
To start, what a somber yet beautiful poem. It feels like it's telling the story of an underappreciated artist, someone who uses art as their language and their chosen outlet, yet others just aren't speaking the same language. And the meaning, the message, goes unheard...
*ahem* As far as a technical review goes, I don't really have anything to remark on. Very nice metric, the substance is on-point, and you have so many great rhymes here. The rhyme scheme overall does feel a bit sporadic, some verses being AABB, others ABAC, one not rhyming at all. But the poem is so good, I don't even care—this is lovely as-is!
As far as favoite lines and parts, I would have to say...
This first verse is GOLD, and immediately snagged my attention for the whole poem. Because, I mean, this is so real! So many of us communicate through our art what we fail to communicate through words, for a plethora of reasons.
I like this because it speaks to that frustration, when others shrug off your art as just a "hobby" or a silly little project. Like, just because you don't understand this art, it doesn't mean you have to belittle it...
THIS, this frustration! When you reach that point of asking yourself, "what will it take for this to be understood?!"
The flower imagery here is so beautiful, and I love the metaphor going on here. Amazing!
Overall, this was such a great poem. Thank you for sharing this, and nicely done! <3
"They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night."
"Words have no power to impress the mind without the exquisite horror of their reality.”
"I would define, in brief, the poetry of words as the rhythmical creation of Beauty."
I love that this is a testament to the endeavors and anguish of artists told through, ironically, a form of art. It is doubtless very eye-opening to many, and feels relatable to me.
"Will you just stare at the art // or try to understand the heart behind it?" I like these lines a lot because--while I'm not sure if anyone else does this--when I see paintings or similar forms of art that I enjoy, I stare at them for long periods of time just to admire the different elements, retracing them in my mind and imagining the steps the artist took to achieve that. It also reminds me of the problem of how often times people look at art not to find the deeper meaning or intention behind it, but rather to criticize the art and how an artist executed certain ideas.
Love this poem overall. One piece of advice I have is to remember the difference between "it's" and "its", with "it's" referring to "it is" and "its" being a possessive pronoun.
I wish you a lot of knowledge and a little bit of luck for your future works.
- obscureoracle