Young Writers Society

Erica watched as the little ripples created by her feet rapidly grew as they spread out into Crystal Creek; a smile spreading across her face as she thought about those ripples. She wondered how far they would go, how much water they would roll over, how many people would see them and wonder where they started.

Erica was like that; a dreamer people called her; she was always floating away on a thought, always trying to find the deeper meaning of everything she saw. Her Mother always laughed and called it the curse of a gift, Erica understood her, and she knew her way of thinking was different, she liked that; she liked the idea that she saw the world as a pear and everybody else saw it as a lemon. But thinking different also meant people found it hard to follow her train of thought, as it would leap from one subject to another and a lot of people gave up trying to understand the way her mind worked and she was classed as, not an outsider but different. Erica however wanted nothing but to be the same.

That’s why Erica was so drawn to James. James ‘The Jester’ Mario; he was different too; he was always trying to understand the world. Three weeks ago James had been diagnosed with Cancer. Erica didn’t know much about it, and she was too scared to ask. All she knew was her best friend was scared and there was nothing she could do about it. She knew that he cried himself to sleep; she knew he wanted to do everything he could before he lost the chance. That’s why he didn’t tell anybody but Erica, he didn’t want to be treated differently.

She understood that but she couldn’t help feeling down. She couldn’t help the frown that crawled onto her face when she saw him after one of his hospital trips; she couldn’t stop the silent tears that would wet her pillow each night. Her best friend was dying, and she could do nothing but put on a brave face and hold his hand.

That’s why she was avoiding him, as cruel as it sounded. That’s why she couldn’t stand being alone in a room with him; she could barely handle talking to him on the phone, and whenever he did call she choked up or couldn’t think of things to talk about, he was still going to school, putting on a brave face, but with his constant trips away from school and the noticeable yellow tinge to his skin everybody knew something was wrong and when they worked out Erica was avoiding him they knew it was big.

Erica felt awful about that. She felt awful for leaving him alone when she promised she’d meet him but even though she knew that it was breaking his heart being around him was breaking hers and she wasn’t strong enough to handle that. She wanted to let go now, say goodbye so when she was standing over his casket it wouldn’t be so hard.

She had even started writing her eulogy, for three weeks she had been writing pages upon pages about the life her best friend lived and how much she would miss him. Each page being tossed at the bin, each time she started over more tears spilled down her cheeks. Why was this happening to James? Why was this happening to her?

Every time she tried to write her feelings down more just erupted deep inside her. At night she dreamed of standing over his casket, speechless; nothing left to say, no tears left to cry,

That’s why she had gone to the creek. She had spent entire summer holidays here with James; if she was going to become inspired it would happen here. She thought back to the ripples her feet created, wondering where they were now; who was seeing them, then she realised something. James created ripples. Everybody created ripples and with that she started writing furiously.

Erica looked into the bright afternoon sunlight. She had finally done it, and she had written the hardest piece of writing of her lifetime - her best friend’s eulogy. She had poured her heart onto a single piece of paper, said goodbye to somebody she loved so deeply, loved with such a passion that it hurt.

She was filled with an explainable feeling of accomplishment. She had managed to do something no other person she knew would handle, at only 15 she had finished a task she wished upon no other human being, young or old.

Erica folded the sheet of paper and pushed it deep into her pocket, hoping to push it to the back of her mind, taking with it all the feelings of hurt and pain, all the tears and all the frowns, leaving behind only the memories and pictures of a friendship meant to last forever, no matter where James was in the world or away from it.

When Erica got home that night she remembered with a thud the eulogy. She remembered what she wanted to lose with it and with a sudden burst of misery she raced to her room and threw herself onto her bed, crying herself to sleep.

Erica’s Mother came in later to tuck her in; taking the note that had slipped into Erica’s hand, and placed it in Erica’s desk draw under a pile of school work. The next morning when Erica awoke she noticed the note was missing and with a great smile she raced to the phone.

Something inside Erica told her James was OK; something inside her screamed that he was fine. The note disappearing was a sign; she wouldn’t need the page filled with feelings and tears. James was fine.

She dialled his number and jumped from one foot to the other with every ring, her heart sank when James’s father answered the phone. James always answered the phone.

“Is James home?” She asked weakly, feeling goose bumps appear up her arms. What was she thinking? The note couldn’t have disappeared; it must have fallen under her bed, slipped under he blankets, it could even still be in her pocket.

“No, sorry Erica, he’s not. He had to go to the hospital this morning, emergency tests” James’s father explained. Erica dissolved into tears, James wasn’t OK, James would never be OK.

“I…I had a feeling he would be fine…he was going to be fine.” Erica sobbed down the phone; James’s dad cleared his throat.

“I’ll get him to call you when he gets back.” he said simply before hanging up the phone. Erica sunk into a small ball on the floor, the phone still in her hand, her body shaking with great sobs.

That afternoon James rang Erica back. The eulogy stayed secretly collecting dust under the homework. It was never needed, Erica never found it there, she never searched for it, never needed it.