Hi there @Corvid I am here to do a review on your poem, first this is really short and I feel like it should be a bit longer then it is right now.
description
I feel like this does not have much depth to it like description I am not really shore what some meanings are and stuff like that.
what I think about this poem
I do like it a bit but there is not a nove lines for me to really tell, what it really is about, so I just really feel like there needs to be more lines, and I will give you some ideas down in ideas for your peace of work.
What I think needs a bit of work
Okay not really getting this bit so not really shore what you trying to say here, I also feel like this is a very weird beginning to the poem, I will see if I can help you a bit with the beginning of this, okay moving on now.Who has profited from the bloodlines of long-topped monarchs,
okay no I dear of what the place looks like that this king is in and well, okay now I am not really shore how that word in bold really fits in with this all as well.A universal king.
ideas for your peace of work
the beginning of this poem
line one: tap, tap, tap,
line two: came the sound of some one walking.
line three: the person held a question in there heart.
line four: They came into a room,
line five: and looked at the king sitting in his throne.
line six: the person bowed down.
line seven: "master," the person asked still bowing his head to the floor.
your line: Who has profited from the bloodlines of long-topped monarchs,
your line: of vanished empires most threateningly reborn?
your line: A universal king.
my line: the king looked up at his revel.
your line take out the full stop: The earth and the sea and the dry land
my line: bowing at his feet.
So that is all that I can say, so keep up the good work, if I came across as being really hard on you and unfair I am really sorry please for give me.
@EagleFly out to seek and kill
Points: 27734
Reviews: 386
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