My only suggestion is to change the font to comic sans because it is the god font.
z
When the world descends into chaos
And no law or order stands,
The unspoken rule will hold its ground-
Don't use comic sans.
Haha this is a very cute little poem. First of all, I'm horrible at reviewing poetry so I'm not going to do that. Mostly because I only like poetry if it rhymes and I know that there is so much more to poetry but it just doesn't appeal to me. So yay yours rhymes! Also, not using Comic Sans was always just a known thing for me. So I get what this is saying! It reminds me of something else but I can't think exactly what that is at the moment.
Great job and sorry for the rambling comment,
CreativelyWritten
Hey, yo, ChocolateCello! Stranger here on this fantastic day and I have a review for you!
I'm the residential party pooper. There's a lot of spotlight works that I don't quite see the buzz for, whether it be how they convey the theme or the content, something like that. This was another work that I'm not a big fan of, personally. There are two main factors why, and they're different from the reviewers below. Of course, my opinion doesn't count so feel free to discard this. Let's get into this, shall we?
I don't see the satire. Like a reviewer said below, they thought it was very satirical, but satire has a huge range. I honestly felt that it fell a bit under the category, and more so in the humor category. Satire is making fun of something, but not explicitly saying so. That's what makes satirical works interesting. This was a joke with no social commentary, I would say. So the satire category doesn't quite fit.
When the world descends into chaos
And no law or order stands,
The unspoken rule will hold its ground-
Don't use comic sans.
Yeah! SCREW YOU COMIC SANS.
Hey, Will here, to relate to your hatred of this font.
I hate it when people use comic sans. Calibri is another one I hate. And this poem really does bring that out in people. It takes us to the edge of the world, and a ridiculous setting - when the world descends into chaos - and tells us that even then, the rule will follow - don't use comic sans.
I particularly liked the last line. I think everyone knows why. Hehe.
And the rhyme - yes! Just yes! Your rhyme was so sombre, that I didn't notice it the first time I read your poem. I literally had to go back and re-read it!
In the end
We have all learnt the lesson.
Don't use comic sans,
or I'll put you in the delicatessen.
Okay I don't know where that came from
-willachilles
Hello! Elysium here with a review.
Very satirical! I love it! I will try to keep this review short for this little piece.
First, I did not see the hyphen necessary. I would maybe use a colon instead, but I guess whatever floats your boat.
Also, I was thinking that in the last line you refer to your topic of poem. I think you should capitalize Comic Sans. It looks better and I think it should look that way.
Otherwise, I really enjoyed this. As I said, it's very satirical and really clever. You definitely know how to get people to like your works. I do want to see more poems like this. Don't give up and always write!
-Elysium
It's should be its. Don't worry; apostrophe use get's everyone sometime's.
I think this poem is hilarious, even though I don't know much about comic sans (or fonts in general).
Keep writing like this and you'll do well.
Hiya!
Cute poem. I'm glad we can all agree on hatred of comic sans. The sad thing is that I'm noticing it more and more in the official announcements they hand out at school, and the worksheets and I just want to disregard it every time I see anything written in comic sans.
Anyway, I thought this was a pretty unique poem. I like its simplicity, but I also kind of wish that it had a little more to it. A little more story and flavor and images. As it is, it's pretty good.
I think you need to fix the punctuation a bit. Perhaps you could put a comma at the end of the second line and change the semi colon to a colon or a dash (not a hyphen). Maybe a period at the end would be nice too.
And don't forget, you don't HAVE to capitalize every line. It's not really a problem here, but I'm just letting you know. Personally I only capitalize as grammar dictates me to, such as after a period.
c:
Okay, so that's all I got. I liked the basis behind this, and it was executed pretty well.
Great job, keep writing!
~fortis
Points: 0
Reviews: 170
Donate