beneath the lies

a rewrite of a poem i wrote a long time ago, when i first came on here. would it be better as a story? this is just the beginnings of a story or a better poem so it would be cool to have advice and stuff....

who knew you would be the one to break my heart.

i imagine:

a darkened, anonymous room
a jumble of white sheets
shards of broken daylight fling themselves across
the bed, across his torso and yours

clothes lay strewn across a carpeted floor
gathering carpet fluff and the smell of old things
jeans containing his wallet
maybe a picture of him and his kids, their smiling faces
caught in that moment, that happy moment

snap went the camera and
on went their lives,
the minutes, the days
until you tumbled into each other's worlds
making that happy photograph just an empty reminder
of a lost world.

circled by his arms
your blonde hair
fans out across the pillow
your cheek glistens with a kiss
your mind is troubled
you feel the guilt
but listening to his heart beat, maybe you are comforted.

you are a ship
so long anchored at one place that,
becoming restless, you tugged until your anchor freed itself
sailed here to this foreign port,
this new embrace.

i wonder if his love is worth my hate and fear
and all the brokeness you cause

downstairs,
your husband cooks another meal
the salty aroma assaults my nostrils
bitter, tangy i bask in its harshness

he does not see
inside your world
does not have his faced pressed up against the glass
as i do

he think that perhaps you are late home and saves your dinner in the oven
later i throw it out the window
and wait up so i can smirk while you search the kitchen for it.[/i]