A lack of color...

A stroke of blue and a spot of orange,
visualize the sun and the ocean.
A mist of black and a dot of white,
the midnight glow reflects commotion.

A box of brown chocolates,
Wrapped in purple paper.
Sweet and tender,
Mild and considerate.
Bound to contain,
The love in his eyes,
Blue marbles,
Glimmering and bright.

A field of green and a pint of yellow,
Frolic through daisies and mystic sprouts.
A hint of red and a dash of pink,
Expand and view my whereabouts.

A lack of color shows my feelings.
My passion,my love, for this wonderfull being.

Comments & reviews · 7
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You have improved! I'm so proud!

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Doubt
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I just love poetry that describes colour or uses colour to describe other things. Your poem was no different.

Keep up the good work.

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Chandni
Comment

yess it was inspired by DCFC :wink:

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Whatsarahsaid
Comment

Nice imagery, was the theme inspired by the song by death cab for cutie "A lack of colour" ?
I agree with the girl who fates loves, that verse doesn't really fit but you show new ideas and structure, keep it up!

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Angel17
Comment

I really liked the colourful imagery, but i do think it would be better if you also included other images.

Good poem though, Lovely ending! :D

...It's ok. But you could probably do better?

A stroke of blue and a spot of orange,
visualize the sun and the ocean.
A mist of black and a dot of white,
the midnight spirit reflects commotion.

It doesn't quite have the right rhythm...

User avatar
zell
Comment

i liked that the beginning was nice the last was awesome and it had the flow :thumb:



You must never give into despair. Allow yourself to slip down that road, and you surrender to your lowest instincts. In the darkest times, hope is something you give yourself. That is the meaning of inner strength.
— Uncle Iroh