Published March 29, 2011
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141,721 Literary Works • 675,615 Reviews
Wow. I really love this, especially since it is a very good way to comfort somebody who has just had a close friend or relative pass away. It has a lot of emotion in it, and it shows. Great job!! Keep it up!!
Hi.... your poem is beautiful
There are lots of powerful emotions
It flowed nicely and was worded perfectly
I also like how you started a new line for were the words 'so far' are.
It really put a lot of emotion into the poem
You did a really great job keep up the great work
-love2read-
thanks heaps guys :]
Hey there! I really like your poem! I would like to first mention the visual appeal. I like the fact that it is centered, the symmetry of the words reminded me of the symmetry in the wings of an angel, or even a bird(Which is good because you mention those in your poem haha). I also like where you started the new lines, the isolation on the words "so far" just adds more emotion to the poem I thought.
Now for the content. I did feel a lot of emotion in this poem, and that made it enjoyable to read. I liked the way that you wrote this and overall you did a great job!
Heyyyyyyy dogs here just giving out a couple pointers. Firstly congrats on the awesome poem! Despite that one little spelling error i dare say this is one of the best poems i have read on YWS. Its short, sweet, too the point and it flows nearly perfectly. My absolute favorite part of the poem that you convey very well is that the narrators perspective and mind changes which is an example of how strong the poem is. You speak your emotions threw this piece very well and i applaud you KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!!!!
TuckEr EllsworTh
hi... your poem is really very beautiful.. except for that little spelling error Amberla93 has mentioned, it was very good piece... good job:)
This is amazing, so full of emotion, one could truthfully say that it's powerful. I love it, though I do have one small edit.
In this line: " Because your heat was so pure and full of love" I believe you meant "heart" and not "heat."
That is the only mistake I saw, other then that, GREAT piece.
God Bless,
Amber.