Life hasn't been as amazing as I thought it'd be. Meeting shitty people, or false attitudes bothers me the most too. I hate to think that life is full of short comings and poor, badly planned endings; but that's the way things are coming to.
Life unfortunately have unraveled for me this way; with hard headed parents and disappointing myself. i use to write a lot, and maybe relief the agony that is trapped in my heart yet I'll never be able to do that because my life is in a constant repeat. Nothing good has ever really happened to me, maybe a handful of things but that's about it. Nothing terrifying has happened to me either; but the constant, small happenings only make it worse for me. Someone who has problems coping or showing any real emotion. It's complicated when you hide your true feelings and as courageous you appear, you're just insignificant and helpless.
I'll be forever lost with myself, and there is no cure on how to be found or saved. I just hope one day I'll overcome these terrible endings and find a happy one. Until then, I'll still be trapped in this bubble; unable to breath, has found no will to live, and has sunken to the bottom of the ocean, with no escape.
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140,685 Literary Works • 673,594 Reviews
Hey, came to say how refreshingly honest this work is. So many people tell the common lie that life is great, but it's good to know that I'm not the only one who thinks that the world could be so much better and that life isn't all fun and games. I also commend you for sharing these thoughts and feelings . . . they are very hard to share as they are so personal, and I think it's a brave thing to do to open up like this to so many people. Well done! I really enjoyed this piece.
There are tiny errors but otherwise the writing is great and the idea/message was given well.
One more thing is that this piece is relatable; I suggest you continue to write with all the passion poured into your work because it is indeed heartfelt.
There are tiny errors but otherwise the writing is great and the idea/message was given well.
One more thing is that this piece is relatable; I suggest you continue to write with all the passion poured into your work because it is indeed heartfelt.
I like this a lot. It really shows a lot of personal deep down emotions, which is a very good way to get good writing like this. Often time stories come from personal experiences, like this one I can tell. Anyway, I only found one or two errors. But of course nothing extreme. Here you wrote:
"Life unfortunately have unraveled for me this way" here you used "have" instead of "has". So the ending result should be, "Life unfortunately has unraveled for me this way". Also:
"i use to write a lot, and maybe relief the agony that is trapped in my heart yet I'll never be able to do that because my life is in a constant repeat." Here you need to capitalize the "I", and make "relief", "relieved". Also, I would make this into two sentences, and add "and" before "yet". So: "I used to write a lot, and maybe relieve the agony that is trapped in my heart. And yet, I'll never be able to do that because my life is on a constant repeat." Other than those two mistakes there is nothing wrong with this at all. Your writing style is very nice. And I really LOVED this piece. Keep writing and never stop. You have a real talent for it.