Published December 17, 2010
I hate...
small spaces & uncomfortable chairs
overdue books & unheard prayers
unreturned smiles & cliched quotes
empty tissue boxes & scratchy throats
chain wire fences & broken skin
holey stockings & straight gin
misplaced socks & forgotten mail
steep steps & jagged nails
condescending looks & missing pens
thursday mornings & lying friends
missed calls & dirty shoes
unwashed hair & ignored views
scratched c.d's & busy paths
wilted flowers & steaming baths
cold feet & burnt out matches
permanent markers & elbow patches
broken promises & tarnished steel
most of all the way you make me feel
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
140,113 Literary Works • 673,017 Reviews
I personally liked this, and I have nothing bad to say. Good Job!
eeekk. I love this.
I enjoy reading poems like this.
Really entertaining.
I LOVED THIS!!! I think we hate similar things.. Lovely poem!
Simple and sweet. Very effective. Keep writing!
The rhyming was really good, I like the flow of it in my mind whilst reading it. Rhyming is good
I really liked it, I think it sounds cheerful in a weird kind of a way, like you're 'telling the world to go to hell' (only in a way that wasn't totally cliched) and it all ties up neatly at the end, which is nice.
The only thing I'd change is the line:
This is because every single 4th thing you hate in a stanza has two syllables and this has only one, so it interrupts the rhythm.
Other than that well done!
Great poem, the rhythm and rhyme really led up to a great ending. This is the only thing I would change, though. Only to give the poem more emphasis.
I like the way the things you hate rhyme!
I really like this poem and its simplicity, especially the fact that it relates to most people.
It's sort of ironic really because it's called 'Things I hate' yet the poem makes you smile.
It's amazing when you write off a specific topic such as this. There are so many things that a single person dislikes and I found it funny that I hate all these things too. The rhyming made it flow brilliantly and kept me reading till the end.
. Hahaha -Fantastico! Keep on Writing!My favorite is
I like this poem good use of description keep it up and keep posting
I like this poem good use of description keep it up and keep posting
Ah, I love sweet and simple poems like these. They're really cute and always fun to read... definitely my kind of poem!
On the other hand, this has a sort of bittersweet feel to it. The only thing I would recommend is to use capital letters at the start of sentences. Or maybe something like this:
Overall, I really liked it! Well done and keep writing,
~ Error404