Untitled

by Book_Worm_113

Published April 3, 2007

Wingless bird, how desperately you call
out from your own locked in cage,
your once raging power; now not racing at all
shrieks disgust the air, but not known as rage,
holds onto warmth in cold branches that fall
danger awaits nearer now than these frozen beds,
yet passion for life never fully leaves or ends!

Comments & reviews · 1
veronicafletcher wrote a review Review · Apr 4, 2007

Book_Worm_113 wrote:your once raging power; now not racing at all


How is the power raging and racing? Try revising 'now not'.

You also used 'rage' twice in the poem. Try changing that.

Over all, I think it was pretty good. Not your best, but once again, MAJOR KUDOS for the rhymes!



But even the worst decisions we make don't necessarily remove us from the circle of humanity.
— Wes Moore, The Other Wes Moore