Young Writers Society

I think it's really good. I would give you some constructive criticism but the others before me said it for me.

As its own line, the "The reason why we cry, we lie, we fight, we kill, we die" made me stop and think, wow, I really like that line, but I think that since the previous two lines also use that rhyme, I concentrated first on the rhyme scheme, then on what the poem was actually saying. Currently, your rhyme scheme is ABAAAA; try to change it up a little. Maybe something like ABBBAA?

The try/cry/lie/die rhyming got a little wearisome in the fourth line. But, despite that, I think your fourth and fifth line go together well.

I'm not entirely sure what the subject, or perhaps I should say idea? of the poem is, but I enjoyed that structure of it. Although, I think it is too simple.. I think perhaps you could go more into it, or use better words, or say a little more, but, mind you, with the same amount of words/lines. The brief quality of it makes it good. But it's a bit too simplistic, and as I said it was hard for me to pick up on the full idea.

But, even so, I liked it. Perhaps consider changing some stuff? Hope I helped.