If you live to be a hundred, you will never believe me. Not that you will live to be a hundred – you smoke, and yours is the body type most likely to suffer heart attacks, though I pray to the God you don’t believe in to protect you from all anxiety – but however long you live, you will never believe me. And I know that.
But again I will tell you, almost as proudly as I did that day in your office:
The first time you kissed me, I was not scared.
Sometimes I wonder whether you can remember it, our first kiss – my first kiss, the one you felt guilty for – and, if you can remember, whether you ever do. Do you? I skipped into your office, happy just to talk to you, happy to give you hugs, wishing that I’d ever been kissed before so I could work up the guts to kiss you though I was content enough for now just to be yours.
To kiss you! I wanted it so badly. But it never occurred to me, as we stood there with my forehead bumping your glasses as we bent our heads together, that I was about to. We’d stood that way so many times since our second date. At first it had sent thrills along my spine, he’s going to kiss me! But then you didn’t; we just hugged, or you kissed my forehead (which was almost exhilarating enough), and so I stopped expecting anything. That day in your office, I did not think, He’s going to kiss me!
I only thought, I wish I had the guts to kiss him.
But that day, in your office, the last place on earth it should’ve happened, you took my face in your hands and kissed my lips.
Understand that I’m not reprimanding you. You reprimanded yourself enough, I know: I wish it hadn’t been here, you told me as we texted about it that afternoon, but I just couldn’t wait anymore.
And to me, it deserves no reproach. Had we been somewhere more romantic, less forbidden, I might’ve expected it – and in all honesty, it was the nonexpectance that saved me from anxiety. In the moment you first kissed me, I was too surprised to be nervous. And when you kissed me again, it was the most natural thing in the world for me to kiss you back.
Then, you must remember, I told you, in a voice filled with the pride of a five-year-old rather than a teenager, I wasn’t even scared!
Liar, you said, and pulled me in to kiss me again.
Realistically I knew, even then, that it wasn’t going to last. Keeping our secret put a strain on both of us, the thought always present at the back of our minds: If anyone finds out, we could get fired. And while we said the age difference didn’t bother us, it is the reason you felt guilty for having stolen my first kiss. The reason I would never meet anyone on your end. I have never believed they even knew about me: The eighteen-year-old girl is merely the victim, the helpless hopeless romantic hanging on the words of an older man; the man in his thirties is a cradle-robber at best, at worst a creep.
But I overlooked it, then. Now, when we have both, I think, moved on, when we have separated – left work for reasons that, in the end, had nothing to do with a forbidden romance – it’s easier to look back on things and accept them for what they were. What they are. Now, when I think of you and wonder where you are, I only hope I sometimes made you as happy as you made me.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,022 Literary Works • 672,759 Reviews
Hm... a novella... No, I don't think that would work with this piece.
I like this short story/monologue/other though. Of course your style is great and the above comments are right, you really did pull the reader in.
I can't really criticize anything about this piece. I enjoyed reading it, it wasn't too short and it wasn't too long, the style was good, especially the very first paragraph. I really really liked how you started this piece off.
I guess that's all I can say to that.
~Lemikita
I also like romance stories with huge age...well, actually, I don't like reading romance stories in so far as KMart paperback stuff goes, where the dialogue is sappy and disgusting and TOTALLY unrealistic (where men are total gods, basically - admittedly, real-world men aren't bad, but they're definitely not GODS) and steamy sex happens every other chapter.........
Hahaha, okay...I've never actually read any KMart paperbacks. That's just kind of the general impression they give off.
^_^
But I like writing about huge age differences. Always older men and younger women, because it just feels weird to write about it the other way - and in real life, honestly, what woman in her right mind would start a real relationship with a guy fifteen years younger than her??? Seeing as men mature more slowly than women (this is not a slam on guys, this is an established fact), you've gotta date guys who are at least a little older than you just to get one who's at the same maturity level. So why would you date someone a lot younger? The immaturity would drive you batty!
But yes, I like writing about that. But once again...I'm not sure how to make this into a novel/novella. If anyone has any ideas for me, though, let me know!
~Blue
Hello, Blue Africa, (may I call you BA?
)
Yes, this sounds more of a prologue. Did you have any thoughts of writing it to a novel? It's good.
LOL...It makes the readers wonder what is up? I was kinda hooked in...would like to know more, like, what they look like, or what their names are! XD
What the huh...I like romantic stories with huge age differences
I'm such a dork though.
Hmm...question: How do you think I could make it into a novella, if I chose to? Like...would I tell the story of this forbidden relationship, or what? Just curious. In case I decide to go for it, someday when I'm not working on like half a dozen other stories... ^_^
Wow. this is great. But it doesn't seem like a short story, it sounds like a novelle. I think that ou should make it a book. This pulled me in!
Keep Writing!
Nike
I think this could be a short story- people are often too critical about defining what they are and aren't.
Overall, this was written very well- not my favorite thing I've read from you, but I just love your writing style... it's always very natural and original, the way you express yourself. This was no exception from that style.
Great job.
-Coral-
Thanks.
Yeah, I guess it is more of a monologue, but I just kind of put it under short story out of habit, I guess. Because it's not a monologue in a script, and it's not poetry (dramatic monologue). I guess it's "other"...but where's the fun in that?
This isn't a short story.
It's almost a perfect monologue. You have the emotion perfect, and very little description, which, I usually would freak about, but it works here.
This is an amazing piece, like nothing I've actually read on this site before.
Keep writing!
~WickedWonder