Published April 29, 2021
Synthetic
Apathetic
Hallucinogenic
Systematic
The people are plastic
Perfectly formed in society’s mould
Perfectly shaped by the grand designer
There are no imperfections
A society of fiction
Existing only in the service of itself
Why should one progress
When everything is fine?
The apathetic sit and watch as the world slowly sours
And I gave up a long time ago
Jaded
Watched
Paranoid
Afraid
The plastic people walk and watch
Looking for imperfections
Things to complain about
To their apathetic friends
No one cares about much of anything
Hyper Individualism has taken its hold
Why does no one care about their neighbor?
Why not their compatriots?
Why have compassion
When the machine will fix the imperfections?
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Hi! Hope you are doing well. Here's a little review,
You have used a wonderful metaphor - Plastic People. There are a lot of poems about society and its cruelty but never have i come across one where people are compared to some thing so synthetic as plastic. What a thoughtful way to emphasize the manufacture of people by society.
The use of single but very powerful words in different lines makes the reader focus on them more. Your vocabulary is very diverse here, good job on that.
To me the above line feels like the heart of the poem, its a wonderful imagery.
There is nothin wrong with complaining, we are human we need to lighten our emotional burden but when that complaining is a result of ungratefulness then its a shallow deed, the above line describes it well.
The above lines are very aptly questioning the problem of todays world. Individualism is important to stop us from turning into a flock of sheep {I am sure sheeps are also very individualistic but to a common human they all look the same;) } But i feel there is a need for more compassion among people now a days. This is as much an advice for myself as others.
Here's a suggestion,
Maybe you could try using a bit more punctuations in your poem, it helps the reader understand the flow.
All in all, i love your poem. Keep writing such great pieces.<3
Thanks for the review and thanks for understanding the message! In the future I will make sure to include better punctuation. Thanks for taking time to read, review, and otherwise consider my work!
well, this was excellently done and brought together. I highly commend you. As a poetry lover, I love symbolism as much as the next guy and reading your piece had me grinning like an idiot. What can I say? I loved it!! I mean.. you hit all the key points and I couldn't stop nodding my head in agreement the entire time. This was stupendous. Never stop writing my friend. you are onto something good.
Hey thanks! Glad I nailed the symbolism as that was a huge focus! Thanks for taking to time to read and review!