Young Writers Society

December 5, 2021

" I wish this never happened. I wish, I wish this day wouldn't come," Mini said to herself and sighed. " Why did I go ? ," she said. " You know how monstrous the world is with you." She was crying.

" Fucking I don't have anyone to support me. I can't even tell mother ", she cried out loud. She was wailing.

Mini was a third year college student. She had failed in her previous semesters. " I have to do this, I have to , I'm so sorry my baby, my angel ", she cried, rubbing her right hand over her belly . " I'm so cruel to you I know but what can I do ? Your dad has fled. Fucking your dad has fled. That bastard has disappeared. I'm fucking alone, I'm so alone ", she cried, still keeping her hand over her belly. Her third semester was kicking in. She was so weak in Mathematics. She had failed in first and second semesters. " If I don't pass this time, what will happen to me? ", she said to herself, holding the textbook and the maths copy. " I'm a fucking disappointment to my family. To everyone around me. What will happen to me? ", she covered her face with her hands. Her hands were trembling. She ran to the washroom, bent over, knelt down and puked. It was the fourth time she was puking that day. Her head was spinning. She looked at the window. " Are you with me dear God? ", she started crying again. She stood and washed her face and let out deep breaths .

She sat down on the bed with her textbook ,the sample question papers and her copy. " I have to pass this time. No matter what happens", she said to herself and started solving. She solved five questions and sighed.

Her eyes fell on the pregnancy kit that was kept on the side of her bed. She held it close to her breasts. Yes, two lines. Pregnant! She was pregnant 9 weeks, 2 days already. She felt suffocated. She stared through the window. It was 1 pm , a sunny Tuesday afternoon. She had nobody to tell what she was going through. Her elder brother was studying MBA and was distant from her. Both of them disliked each other. She was not like him, studious and well-behaved. Not a good daughter, not a good sister. The sky was so blue. Life was going on. She let out deep breaths.

Suddenly, her phone vibrated. She was startled. She took it and saw a text. Mifepristone and misoprostol, mifepristone first and misoprostol after one day. And it would be done. It came from an anonymous number. " Hate you bastard , you coward, sending me text but fled in the right time, you bastard ", she was cursing. Pulling out a t-shirt and jeans from the wardrobe she went to the pharmacy.

Finally, the medicines were with her. She felt triumphant. As if she had already done it. Her face lit up. She was feeling hopeful. " Finally I'll get the relief I deserve . Finally I'll get rid of it ", she said to herself. She gulped down the mifepristone tablet. " I'll be free from this misery finally, I'll be free ", Mini said to herself , taking deep breaths. She was running her fingers over her belly. " I'll be free , I'll be free , you too will be, I don't deserve you ", she said, tears rolling down her cheeks.

Wednesday She woke up with a start. It was 11 am. She had to take the second medicine. Her hands were trembling. She gulped down cold coffee and cookies nervously. She touched her forehead. She had fever. " Finally I'll be free ", she said to herself and opened her wardrobe. The misoprostol was lying there. It looked wicked. Her head was spinning.

She opened the half- emptied water bottle and gulped the misoprostol. " Finally, I'm free ", she said to herself, her voice breaking, tears were rolling down her cheeks.

Suddenly she felt a sharp pain in her tummy. Her eyes were bulging out , it was so severe. " It's working then ", she said nervously and sat down on the bed. Her limbs were trembling. The pain was sharper this time. She kept her hands over her chest and cried out.

Something was flowing from her vagina. She rushed to the washroom. She opened her pants and saw blood. There was a pool of blood in her panty already. " It's happening ", she cried out. " I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, please forgive me, I'm so sorry . I don't deserve you ", she cried out . The pain was so sharp she sat down on the floor. Blood was gushing out from her vagina. " God forgive me , I've sinned to save my name, my life , God please forgive me ", she cried out. She was perspiring heavily. The floor was bloody. " Help me please, help me somebody ", she cried out keeping her hands over her belly. " Why the hell was I so hungry for some work ? I have fucking played with my body, my life." She was wailing.

An hour passed by. She was lying down on the bloody floor. She was naked. Her clothes were on the floor, filled with blood. Another sharp pain, Lumps of red came out. Her heart was beating fast. " What the hell ? ", she cried out. Putting her fingers inside her vagina she felt something fleshy. She took her fingers out and saw tissues. She passed out.

Another hour passed by. Mini was lying, her body was trembling. She couldn't feel her legs. Blood was flowing cruelly. " I'm free, Im finally free, I have to be strong ", she said. Somehow she stood up and leaned against the wall. She turned on the shower and stood quietly. She was not crying. Her tears had dried. She closed her eyes and felt her body.

Cleaning the washroom she wore pad and fresh clothes. It was a heavy period. She placed a hot water bottle over her belly to reduce the pain. " A death in the family but nobody knows ", she said. She was hungry for modelling job and got her lesson. She was tricked. She paid the price. A death in the family and no sign of grief. A problem aborted but no relief.