This is the first story I have ever read, its amazing. I love it
Unicorns exist.
They always have. I know.
Because ever since I was born, my parents told me so.
They would read me books, every night, about Unicorns. After a while, they ended up being the same books over and over, but I didn’t mind; Unicorns were special.
Once a week on Saturday morning, we would go outside to the garden, sit in a circle, and speak to the Unicorns through our minds.
You see, Unicorns are higher beings; that doesn’t mean they don’t exist. People just can’t see them, can’t feel them. When we die, we turn into honourary Unicorns, and we get to ride atop their backs and enjoy their company. That’s what my dad said when my grandma died. It was alright because she is with the Unicorns now.
And they taught me that the rules of Unicorns are the best. If everyone followed the Unicorns rules, the whole world would be in peace, and the whole world would be a better place. But most people don’t believe in Unicorns; they can’t be the best they can. They can’t become honourary Unicorns when they die, because they never spoke to the Unicorns through their minds.
And when I first went to school when I was five, I told everyone everything I had learned about Unicorns. My mum always told me to tell as many people as I can about Unicorns, and that they exist, because then the world will be a better place. The teacher smiled at me and said, “Sure kid, you believe in what you want to.” After class, I told the girls at the back about the reality of Unicorns, and they were in awe. They liked the idea that a magical realm of magical creatures existed, and they were happy to think that they could ride unicorns when they died.
When I got older, everyone called me crazy.
I always said, "Thank the Unicorns," before eating my lunch, or I wrote a Unicorn message on my books. Everyone shunned me, turned against me. Anyone who I thought might have believed in Unicorns betrayed me.
They sent me to the counsellor.
He said unicorns didn’t exist.
I told him he was misguided!
He was the fool!Unicorns did exist, it was true, and even with his science and logic, nothing proved him right.
Unicorns were higher beings.
Unicorns created the world.
He was an unbeliever, a blasphemer, spreading lies around to other kids.
They called my parents.
They thought I was crazy. My parents lectured the school, lectured the teacher, about lies and oppression.
They know unicorns exist.
My parents threatened to home-school me, so that no one could tell me otherwise about Unicorns. I believed in Unicorns, but I didn’t want me be home-schooled. To my parents I asked,
“What if Unicorns don’t exist?”
They gasped and faulted.
Of course they exist, you can’t let non-believers tell you otherwise.
I was punished that night. I was made to sit in my room, and speak to the Unicorns through my mind, apologising for doubting them.
Instead I thought:
Why do the Unicorns never reply? Why does no one else believe in Unicorns? How did I know that they existed? What is truth? What are lies? Will I really become a Unicorn when I die?
My mother stood at the door frame, she smiled softly, she knew my mind was brooding with questions.
“Have faith,” said she, softly, sincerely. “The Unicorns are always with you.”
I nodded and smiled back.
"You're right," I said. "The whole world will not ride with the Unicorns, only us and those who love them.--"
Everyone who doubts us will burn in the Dragons inferno.Hi Blackwood 
Wow.
I love this piece. It made me smile and think about my retarded best friends :p 
I love the ending,
"Everyone who doubts us will burn in the Dragons inferno."
I love the idea of religion and faith conveyed through this short story.
It's really well-written!
Keep writing,
~Gigi
Haha, this is a very interesting piece of fiction. It made me smile. I loved how you took something so silly and childish and wrote about it in a way so serious. I just loved this so much
Part of this, I think, is an ironic way to mock religion. Some people are so sure that God exists, and it's become so normal in our society to believe in him. But really, if you think about it logically, it seems rather silly. I mean, the thought of a magical man who's been around forever for no reason and just creates things with his magical powers is just so crazy! Don't get me wrong, I'm jewish and I believe in god, but even as I do I understand and accept the fact that it all sounds pretty insane. But I believe anyway, because that's my choice. So, what I'm trying to say is that this is a very clever story. It has a lot of secret messages and meanings hidden beneath it, and I like that
Another little message that I found is the difference between childhood and adulthood. When the girl told of unicorns in Kindergarten, the other little girls found her story endearing and the teacher found it amusing. Yet as an adult people only found her stories insane. I guess it goes to show that in our society, imagination and creativity is sometimes deemed as only acceptable in children. That was interesting to me.
Anyway, I just want to say that that was a very great piece of work. Keep writing
I guess that I'm going to be the one doing this, even though I don't want to.
I was reading some of the reviews and thought "WTH?"
Honestly people, this is fiction and NOT REAL. Get it? Got it? mnkay. Onwards
This was put in satire for the kid making a Hell. That's funny. Why? Cuz it's a kid!
That's it. Sorry for the cuss word, but how else are you going to describe it? Besides Hades.
With All Do Respect
Whole Some Reader
First off just let me tell you that I love this to bits and pieces! I understand the meaning you were trying to convey. I loved the fact that even in a religion as peaceful and beautiful as that of a Unicorn religion, people are still quick to pull out the card "If you don't believe, you'll burn in hell!"
This story is clever, has great message behind it, and is bit of a breath of fresh air. I loved the narrator, with his innocence and blind faith in the Unicorns. It reminds me of when I was younger. I connected to this story on a personal level and appreciated it's message.
Marvelous writing, perfect symbolism; extremely great work!
This was very meaningful!
One question though, do you believe in Unicorns in real life?
Ok next thing.
I loved the idea that when people die they turn into honorary unicorns. That's pretty cool.
Like @Richelleroy said, I thought this would be something cute but it ended up being something meaningful.
Also at the end when you say that those who doubts us will burn in the Dragons Inferno, does that mean that there will be some kind of sequel?
Overall this was a very good story!
OK..
This was interesting.
I see your belief, and won't argue. Though I think I won't burn in Dragon's inferno for disagreeing.
You believe in Unicorns. The older you get, the more people you meet are going to think you're crazy. Mmkay?
Alright.
Because most people don't believe in Unicorns at the ripe age of... twenty or so. And saying first thing to some one, "I believe in Unicorns!" will bring the wrong message to mind. Unicorns are often considered a fairy tale. Something little kids dream about. So just make sure you bring the Unicorns up after you start to know you can trust someone not to make fun of you, mmkay?
This was pretty cool, and everyone has doubts, just make sure you believe in what you want to believe in. And everything will go like a river from there.
Well, I had to read this...
Thanks,
ShadowWings, aka pegasusgirl2
Hey there!
I liked this, when I was little I thought unicorns were the coolest things ever, since I'm a horse lover and all, I thought a horse with a horn was just 100 times better haha.
I liked the religious aspect and if you believe in that stongly like a Christian believes in Jesus or any other religion believes in their saviors, you did a very good job showing in this piece. Its always good to have something to believe in so strongly!
The only things I had a problem were a few lines like
"I believed in Unicorns, but I didn’t want me be home-schooled. To my parents I asked,"
That sentence just didn't sit well and doesn't make a ton of sense that you would talk about yourself in 1st person. I dont know if thats how I should phrase it but I wouldnt go around saying, "I wanted myself to go and do...." Do you know what I'm trying to say?
The only thing about this is you called it a satire but this was more just convincing people that they are wrong and that your religious point of view is the right one and everyone is wrong. Its just spiritual. you arent making fun of any one else, youre just pushing your beliefs.
But other than all of that, I liked this. It was creative. And you might think I'm an idiot for asking, but I'm merely just curious, do you actually believe in this or was it just to show that humans arent open to different out there views?
Thank you,
Laura(:
A good story, its good to believe in something strongly but i don't what you believe in his the right thing, have you bothered to ask what or how created the unicorns? I believe strongly in my lord Jesus Christ, the saviour of the world, son of the living God. that something to believe in, so even if unicorns existed, I believe my God created them so why don't you direct your strong believe of Unicorns to the one who creates all things even men and unicorns and holds everything in his hands?
Ahaha! Oh, my God...erm, Unicorn. This was so funny, and surprisingly intelligent; I think it posed a bit of satire towards both sides (theists for ignorance, atheists for shunning and mocking theists), and it prodded at a touchy subject without being offensive (in my humble agnostic perspective). I think you exposed both the good and the bad of religion here, and I sincerely enjoyed your take on the way it impacts society. The thing I found really amusing was how innocent it all sounded...until the end. o_o
I really don't have much to say other than I thoroughly enjoyed this. Keep writing, and best wishes. xxx
That was a very fun, interesting read. Very different and somewhat odd, but good nonetheless and perhaps it is good for that very reason. Keep up the cool, quirky work!
This story does a really nice twist on the unicorn idea. The whole religious aspect of the unicorns? And what's ironic is that a lot of people as the same questions about their own religion. About whether it's real or not, and why they never talk back? I think a lot of people experience a period of time in which they doubt their religion, and your story conveys that doubt and re-security wonderfully.
Great story!
Sylvia.
Well, this made me smile.
I do like this a lot, it brings me back to when I as a little child and obsessed with unicorns
I'm really drawn in as I carry on reading, but I was quite upset when it came to a stop 
I wish there was more to read to be honest, because this is just beautiful. I love how it connects to the children inside of us, and how it awakens our imaginations!
I think you should write more stuff like this, (maybe do something about the "Dragons inferno?" 
Anyways your a brilliant writer! Keep posting!
~EmoChikXoX
This made me laugh... then again it was satire and funny. I liked the ending. Just seemed right for another religion. Every religion has a hell, so it made sense... though the fact that this came from a kid scared the crap out of, I must admit. I always thought that it was the adults that made that kind of assumption....
Any way, back to business. It was well written and it made a good satire, and it would seem like it would be in a R.L. Stine book. I wouldn't put this in spiritual, though.
Why? You ask. I'll tell you why: the physic thing, well yes I understand that completely. (Part of Satire, right?) But honestly I don't think that there IS a religion based on unicorns... But it seems like it would happen any day, don't you think?
All in all a good short and I kinda want more... so... yeah.
With All Do Respect
Whole Some Reader.
Hi!
Haha! Nice work of satire. One thing though, in most random places on the internets and/or IRL, unicorns seem to be *the* chosen theme? Not like I'm saying it's become cliche' or anything, but just an observation. Thanks for a good read!
" When I got older, everyone called me crazy.
I always said, "Thank the Unicorns," before eating my lunch, or I wrote a Unicorn message on my books. Everyone shunned me, turned against me. Anyone who I thought might have believed in Unicorns betrayed me. "
The transitions here are a little choppy. I think it would be better ifyou work around these to make it less weird. Also, it seems like added as an afterthought, just so you'd get to comment on this practice as well. Try to work around this.
"My parents threatened to home-school me, so that no one could tell me otherwise about Unicorns. I believed in Unicorns, but I didn’t want me be home-schooled." I'm confused here. Who did the parents threaten? If the school, then why should the school care? Or if the narratow, again why? Because so far, the narrator has shown instances of adhering to unicorn-belief right?
" Everyone who doubts us will burn in the Dragons inferno." This. Personally, I didn't like it. But, it's fine, I guess.
Thanks for a great read!
Cheers!
Can I just say, this is beautiful. Unicorns are alive all around us people! I love this too much
Hello! Anywho, I shall review your work! I've always been a great fan of short stories so here I go! 
I'm sorry for starting of my review like this but I just needed to say it. I guess, the thing that bothered me the most about your story is the way you structure sentences. There were many comma splices. There were times when you put commas despite the fact that it doesn't need one, like:
"After a while, they ended up being the same books over and over, but I didn’t mind; Unicorns were special."
I'm not talking about the first comma. The first comma is the proper way to follow a transition word but the second comma was a bit redundant.
There are other grammatical mistakes but I prefer to leave that out because these are the kinds of mistakes wonderful authors like you can easily edit out when read again.
Anywho, what I do love about your piece is the fact that when you translate this whole piece as something literary, you get many connotations for "the Unicorns". At some point, even if "Unicorns" isn't exactly the most concrete belief of the people, they can relate with the character at hand because of the feelings welled up by how the work was written. To this, I commend you. I don't initially believe in Unicorns (boohoo for me) but I can somehow connect with the character in terms of his thoughts and his innocence.
Apart from that, I find this line:
"Everyone who doubts us will burn in the Dragons inferno."
--- pretty confusing. As a first time reader of a subject related to Unicorns, this gets a bit puzzling because there seems to be an "inside joke" that was meant to fascinate the author only even if the reader wants to know as well. After all, what os the "Dragons inferno"? Where did that come from? Did it come from the book he was reading when he was young? Nevertheless, the reader never finds out, rendering the reading experience rather incomplete.
Anywho, those are the only things I'd like to point it. Overall, it's a good story. Depending on the reader, the "Unicorn" can be anything. This is the best point of the story because we never truly understand the character but we only comprehend his emotions. I commend you for writing this story even if it's quite weird, to be honest with you. Keep it up and I'll be sure to read your future works.
Best regards,
Coralyn
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