z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

Old Lives - Chapter 3

by ExOmelas


The cool breeze whooshed up at me as I leapt out of the car. I could feel a sharp pain in my ear, which I guessed was Shadow clinging on for dear life. I landed lightly on my paws and gave Shadow a little nudge to help him regain his balance. I heard the car door thud shut behind me and turned round to see Paddy leaning on it. He was side-on to me, so I let my eyes study his face but was on guard to look away if he spotted me staring at him.

There were rings round his eyes and his skin was even redder than normal. The pain this was all causing him niggled at me like the guilt I felt every time I accidentally killed a fly. It nagged at me, taunted me. I wanted to go over and stroke his leg and tell him not to worry – but I couldn't. Then I would have to speak, and that was what had started all this.

I hoped he would soon snap out of it, but he remained motionless for at least a minute. I glanced from the clear blue sky to the flecked paint that marked out the parking spaces. Everything seemed to stay still. I couldn't even feel Shadow wriggling around behind my ear. I looked to my right, towards the barrier we'd entered by, but it was still. No car entered, no car left. Then, I looked to my left.

“What in holy hell is that?” I exclaimed. I thrust a paw towards an enormous glass building. Out of one curved wall protruded a wide yellow tube and through the reflections bouncing off the glass I was sure I could see a pirate ship.

Paddy spun round and pushed himself off the car.

He smiled down at me and said, “It's a swimming pool.”

I raised one eyebrow. “You swim in a pirate ship?”

He chuckled and started to lead us towards the glass doors that glinted with sunlight from all angles.

“No,” he explained, “Little kids play on that. There's lots of different pools and rides. There's even an outdoor pool!”

“Then why are we here?” Shadow's words pounded down my ears and I yelped as they thumped my eardrums. He whispered, “Sorry.”

“Remember,” said Paddy, “The centre is made from the leisure centre. Pirate ships and outdoor pools are the main component's of Glydale council's leisure budget.”

“Huh,” I said.

I stayed silent until we'd got up the steps to the door. Paddy stood in front of it for a few moments, readjusting the straps on the rucksack that was holding my basket, before it slid open with a sigh. It was called an automatic door, which I knew despite this being the first time I'd ever seen one. I didn't think I was going to get used to this any time soon.

When we emerged on the other side, the darkness felt like it was blanketing me for a moment. Then my eyes got used to what was really only gloom in comparison to the dazzling weather, and I glanced around. There was a desk, where I guessed people paid for swimming, a corridor off to the right – maybe that led to the big yellow tube thing – and a staircase leading down.

Paddy stepped forward to the desk but there was nobody there. He leaned over the edge of it – was he hoping to find a helpful pigeon? – but stood back up a second later and shrugged.

“Excuse me,” called a voice. I swivelled round to face the corridor and saw a bright woman in jeans and a hot pink fleece hurrying towards us. When she reached Paddy she extended her hand to him. He shook it, then she shook my paw and Shadow's webbed foot.

“Hello,” I said, “I'm Miles. This is Shadow, and this is Paddy.”

I gestured with my head towards each of them, which was not particularly effective in indicating Shadow.

“My name is Jan Evans,” she replied, “I see you received my letter.”

“Yes,” I said, “I'm quite excited about it, if I'm honest.”

I was sure I could hear Shadow scoff, but nobody said anything. I examined the smooth blue tiles for a moment then glanced back up at Jan.

“Where is everyone?” I asked.

Now it was Jan's turn to glance at her feet. “There was a … um … situation. It's all resolved, don't worry, but we had to restrict movement for a while so everyone could cool off.”

My eyebrows shot up and Paddy gasped.

“What happened?” he asked.

Jan waved his question away and said, “Don't worry, it's under control.”

For the second time that day, I could sense information was being hidden from me. I wondered how often Paddy had concealed something from me before I was aware he was doing it. Maybe the habit was going to take a while to die amongst the humans. Well, I decided, I was just going to have to speed it up. I opened my mouth to ask again what the problem was, but was cut off by a sharp beep.

I managed not to gasp but I felt myself and Shadow tense at the shrill noise. Jan simply rolled her eyes and drew a small metal object out of her pocket. Her mobile phone, I knew, but I still had no idea how I came by such knowledge. She flipped it open and tapped at the keys, then snapped it closed and shoved it into her pocket.

“Sorry,” she said, “Dominic Howell, council representative. He keeps nagging me for numbers of residents but I keep telling him, a head count is not my top priority right now. Right, are you three ready to come have a look downstairs?”

I nodded and started to walk forward towards the stairs. The corridor that stretched away off to my left ignited my curiosity and the staircase – especially the light flooding up from where it twisted round on itself – seemed a portal into my new life. I couldn't wait to investigate.

“Are you not coming, Mr MacGuire?”

I whirled around at the sound of Jan's voice. Shadow slipped to the side a little but I'd grown confident that he'd hang on fine. Paddy was standing exactly where he had been stood a moment ago, not a single step closer to the staircase. His eyes were a little pink and he swallowed deeply.

“Paddy?” I asked. I walked back over to him – which to be fair was only seven or eight steps.

He crouched down and closed his eyes, then reached his hand forward and stroked me behind the ear. His finger was confident and strong, lingering before it withdrew, but I could tell it was also definite. The little nook of my skull throbbed with the knowledge that the absence it felt was permanent.

“I'd rather not come downstairs with you, if that's okay with you two,” Paddy said, his voice wobbling every few words.

I blinked up at him, feeling my own throat tense.

“But why?” I asked, “I … I don't want to say goodbye yet.”

Paddy shook his head and stood up. “I'm sorry, I have to go.”

I whimpered like an abandoned kitten as he shook Jan's hand and thanked her for running the centre. She nodded and smiled at him, as if this all made sense, as if it made sense for him to just walk away without any warning.

“Please,” I whispered, but I don't think he heard me.

“Goodbye, Shadow,” he said, “Goodbye, Miles.”

And with that he wiped his eyes on his sleeve and strode out of the centre, the automatic doors parting graciously to let him past. I gaped at Jan, but she was already leading us to the top of the stairs. I let my legs carry me down the steps until the point where the staircase turned back on itself and faced in the direction of the car park. Through a glass ceiling above a bubble-pool I glimpsed Paddy striding away from the building, his hands thrust into his pockets and his shoulders hunched over. He looked unbearably tense, like his body was about to crack.

I picked up my pace as I moved down the second half of the stairs and skidded to a halt at the bottom. There were rocks and plants everywhere, as if I was going to be living in a cave for the foreseeable future. The landing at the bottom of stairs was surrounded on two sides by glass walls that let me gaze upon the eerily still water. The other two sides were the stairs I'd just come down, and a set of double doors with a long glass panel down each door. I could see some sort of box within, but I had no idea what it was supposed to be.

I glanced up at Jan and she nodded to me.

“You ready?” she said.

I held her gaze and replied, “Yes.”

“Uh-huh,” Shadow mumbled. I could feel his muscles tense as he lay behind my ear.

“Alright then.” She eased the left hand door open and gestured for me to go through.

The moment I entered I forgot all about what the box could have been. I didn't take in any of my surroundings, only what was surrounding me – and that was the smell. It was overwhelming! It was like a cross between stale fish and chemical disinfectant.

I gasped. “What the hell is that smell?”

“It's chlorine,” said Jan. “It keeps the pool clean.”

Somewhere in my head, I remembered the word 'chlorine', but I couldn't place where I'd heard it. I quite liked the idea of knowing what it was though. I would never have known how water was kept clean in my old life. There was so much for me to learn now, so much I'd never have had access to a week ago. I took a deep gulp of the stench and grinned.

Jan's voice brought my attention back to the voice. It had a door on the front, but no windows. For some reason the bottom of the door was a couple of inches off the ground. I flinched. There were at least ten of them lined up like a terrace stretching off to my left, and I was willing to bet there were more rows behind this one. Were they planning on keeping us locked up like at a pound? Were we to be rehoused in cages like a zoo?

“It's called a cubicle,” Jan explained, “It's where humans get changed into their swimsuits before they go in the pool.”

Images of elastic draw-chord bags full of towels and swimming gear flashed through my mind. I shook my head and tried to focus on the towering red door in front of me. Jan swung it open to reveal a single bench that lined the back wall of it. The back wall itself was absurdly close to the door at the front. I could barely imagine sitting down in there, never mind curling up to sleep.

“I'm sorry it's so small,” Jan said. Presumably she'd been informed of its inadequate size before. “We were going to knock down the back wall so you'd have this one and the one behind it, but there have just been so many ex-pets needing sanctuary. We've needed every one. That's why it's one per household, too.”

I tried to look up at Shadow. “We're perfectly fine together, right?”

“Of course,” Shadow replied, from the opposite side of my head to where I'd thought his head was. I frowned and gave up trying to see him.

I noticed with a start that Jan had the rucksack Paddy had been carrying on the way in. I wasn't sure my basket would even fit in the cubicle.

“Is there any chance I could get some sheets and pillows and sleep on the bench instead of my basket?” I asked, “It feels weird being in it now.”

Jan nodded and smiled. “Of course, Miles. Shadow, is there anything you would particularly like to sleep in?”

“Miles' basket,” he replied, without hesitation.

She slung the rucksack off her back and placed it on the tiled floor of the cubicle. I padded over to it and wrapped my paws around the clips that held it shut. I was confident I would be able to do it, but I had to work out how. I tried to separate my claws far enough that I could squeeze one side of the clip with each claw but I couldn't stretch them anywhere near wide enough.

Eventually I managed to wriggle my paw between the clip and the rucksack, wrap my claws around the further away side of the clip, rest the heel of my palm on the nearer, and squeeze. My foreleg trembled but I managed to open the clip before it snapped completely. I gasped and curled over.

“Could you do the other one, please?” I asked.

Jan smiled with one side of her mouth; I guess she understood that I wanted to prove I could do everything humans could. Either that or she found me amusing. Regardless, she bent down and clicked open the other clip, then rolled back the cloth lid of the rucksack and dragged my basket out.

“It sounds like there's other stuff in there too,” she said, “I'll leave the two of you to investigate while I go get you some bedding, Miles.”

She stood and strode back through the double doors, leaving me with a deep frown creasing my brow. Did she think Paddy had packed the bag? He must have packed it, because he was the human, my owner? I mean, he'd put the items into the bag, so you could say he'd packed it. But everything he packed was on either mine or Shadow's request.

I felt a breeze on my head as Shadow leapt into my basket and curled up in one of the cushion's folds. I smiled. Maybe he could get used to life here, since he had the bed he'd found so liberating last night. He barely got to have his eyes closed for a moment, before the noise started from the cubicle next to us.

“How can you agree with that buffoon?” a velvety feminine voice asked.

“First of all,” replied a gravelly male, “He's a baboon. Secondly, how can you call yourself a member of the animal kingdom and agree with what the humans have done?”

“How can you not be grateful for what they've done?” she countered.

I glanced at Shadow. What had who done?

“They have robbed us of our freedom and I will never forgive them,” he hissed. A snake?

“They gave us the freedom to do what we want with our lives, rather than just sit around doing nothing all day.” The female voice seemed to want to end the conversation there. I thought I could hear footsteps cross the cramped space towards the wall we shared with them.

“You, right now, you are sitting doing absolutely nothing.” It seemed the conversation was not over. “And why? Because some woman thought we all needed to 'cool off'. The only animal who understands me was speaking, am I not allowed to show my support?”

There was a snort. “You're not allowed to threaten to swallow a hamster whole.”

Shadow sort of raised an eyebrow at me. He doesn't have eyebrows. He sort of … raised an eye-ridge at me. Before the male voice could answer, a sound whose waves seemed to swoop out of the speakers in the ceiling rang through the rows of cubicles. I shoved my paws against my ears and groaned, visions of fire drills I was more than confident I'd never been a part of flooding through my mind.

Then, suddenly, the ringing cut off and was replaced with the energetic voice of Jan Evans.

“The cool off period is now over. Residents are free to interact as they please.” The mic clicked off and the transmission was replaced by the easiest listening music of all time.

I glanced at Shadow, whose narrow shoulders shrugged. With a deep breath that fluttered as an image of Julie comforting me popped into my head, I pushed the door open and stepped into the aisle.


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Fri Jun 26, 2015 4:03 pm
Carlito wrote a review...



Hello! I've read the previous chapters so I know what's going on. I must say before I begin, very interesting idea. I've never read anything quite like this, so I'm excited to see where you're going to take it.

That being said, on with the review! :)

I could feel a sharp pain in my ear, which I guessed was Shadow clinging on for dear life.

If she (? can't remember the gender of the cat, sorry!) knows that Shadow is up there, she wouldn't guess that the pain was from Shadow, she would know.

He was side-on to me, so I let my eyes study his face but was on guard to look away if he spotted me staring at him.

I don't think any of this is necessary information.

The pain this was all causing him niggled at me like the guilt I felt every time I accidentally killed a fly.

Niggled? What does that mean?

“Then why are we here?” Shadow's words pounded down my ears and I yelped as they thumped my eardrums. He whispered, “Sorry.”

“Remember,” said Paddy, “The centre is made from the leisure centre. Pirate ships and outdoor pools are the main component's of Glydale council's leisure budget.”

This part didn't seem necessary to me.

Now it was Jan's turn to glance at her feet. “There was a … um … situation. It's all resolved, don't worry, but we had to restrict movement for a while so everyone could cool off.”

Why am I getting an ominous feeling about this place? Like maybe Jan and this center aren't a good thing for Miles and Shadow?

I walked back over to him – which to be fair was only seven or eight steps.


“Goodbye, Shadow,” he said, “Goodbye, Miles.”

I mean, can't Miles and Shadow visit? Does this have to be goodbye forever? I know if my bunny suddenly started talking I'd be weirded out, but I wouldn't want to abandon him somewhere! He'd still be my baby :p I guess I don't understand why it has to be this way. Why can't Paddy and the girl adjust to living with talking animals?

Jan's voice brought my attention back to the voice.

Read this out loud. I'm confused.

a sound whose waves seemed to swoop out of the speakers in the ceiling rang through the rows of cubicles.

This is awkwardly phrased in my opinion.


Interesting! I liked that overheard conversation from snake and female voice - it created more mystery about what's going on.

Speaking of what's going on - I'm so curious about what's happening here! I'm glad you haven't given everything away yet in some sort of info-dump :P I'm wondering if this is going to be sort of dystopian in nature? The way I'm seeing it, humans did something and now animals can talk and think for themselves. But I'm guessing this is going to backfire, or there's some big secret conspiracy or plot that's evil and terrible about why all of this has happened. I think it's cool that this is all through the eyes of a cat because it gives a really fresh perspective.

A couple of things I'm wondering about, beyond the general how did this situation come to be:
1. I mentioned this above, but I don't quite understand why all of these animals have left their homes. I get that it would be weird if your beloved pet suddenly started talking and having opinions. Maybe I'm just an uber animal lover or something, but if my rabbit suddenly started talking and having opinions I would think that's so freaking cool and I would try to work together to make sure he's happy and has everything he wants. I wouldn't be like "nah, this is too weird. I liked it better before. Here's where all the other animals like you are going. bye." I would be so worried about him! I would want to know exactly what's going on and that he would be safe and happy, and even then I might not send him somewhere else. So I don't really understand why Paddy was so keen on getting rid of Shadow and Miles.

2. I'm really baffled at out this center is going to work. Naturally, you have prey animals and predators. They're all living in the same place and have access to one another. Isn't that a recipe for disaster? I feel like the prey animals would be in constant danger because you can't have eyes on the predators at all times, you know? Are they suddenly all going to be friends and not fall into normal prey/predator roles because they can suddenly all talk and think for themselves? Is there enough other food for the predators that they don't feel the need to go after the prey animals?
Along those same lines - humans are running this place, right? Didn't all of these animals leave their homes so they could get away from "human rule"? Where are they getting all of the food and other supplies to keep a place like this going? I'd imagine there are a lot of animals there.
(I still have an ominous feeling about this center...)

3. Did this affect all animals? Pets were clearly affected, but what about animals in shelters, the zoo, the wild? How wide-spread is this?
^That'll probably be answered later?


I'm definitely interested in reading more, though! I think you have a really interesting idea and I'm curious to see what direction it will go! :)

Let me know if anything I said is confusing or if you have any questions!




ExOmelas says...


hehehe my plan has worked 3:)

1. All will be revealed...eventually, and with plenty of foreshadowing...
2. In the letter that was sent to Miles (who is a he) it was established that there would be a zero tolerance policy of residents eating other residents. Any resident who ate another resident would be immediately evicted. And be afraid, be very afraid.

3. teeheeeeeeee I am so happy this is a question you are asking. Honestly you have made my day, you are falling right into my trap :P

In short, you are asking all the right questions. As for Julie's problem with the animals, that was going to be dealt with in either the next chapter or the one after - depends how long the next two scenes take.

Thanks for the review, I'll work on the nit-picks :D



Carlito says...


Haha I'm glad I've fallen right into your trap :P
I'm glad you found the review helpful! Looking forward to reading more!



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Fri Jun 26, 2015 4:40 am
ChiravianSkies wrote a review...



Hullo! It's me, the Chirave Canicthus, here to catch up on this story and hopefully bring it closer to "Out of the GR."

Miles is too awesome. He seems to be laid back but still ready for anything, and if anything an unlikely protagonist. (Meant completely in a good way.)

Shadow is really cool too, and with how much he's going off about how bad this place must be, I'm starting to think Miles should start listening. And fast.

About that, I think that you should tone down on the foreshadowing. I mean, you might be leading me on a red herring and all, but I really think that something is wrong with this centre. The woman taking Miles and Shadow to their new home isn't following authority by not taking head counts, as requested. She's taking them to the smallest cubicle... I'm getting bad vibes actually. Not to mention as soon as it happens, there's and entire building dedicated to it?

I might love Miles, but I'm going to side with Shadow here. Miles had better start running.

So, yeah. There's my review. The two characters that Miles overhears also seem to be either important or suspicious... *Narrows eyes*
This chapter was awesome, and I can already see so many things already starting to be born. Sneaky little ideas.
Also, this is for the third review star! :D
Keep Writing! (I won't be able to do any more reviewing until August sorry.)
*Chiravian flies away*




ExOmelas says...


Congrats on your star!

When you say Miles is too awesome, do you mean he is a manic-pixie-dream-cat? I would be worried if he was that. I wouldn't want teenagers falling in love with him...that could end weird...





No. I mean I like his character a lot, not that he's a manic-pixie-dream-cat. Too awesome was meant in a good way too. :)




The simple truth is that authors like making people squirm. If this weren't the case, all novels would be filled completely with cute bunnies having birthday parties.
— Brandon Sanderson, Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians