When Celia Harworth had obtained a job at Joe’s marketing company, she estimated that the job would be all she that she wanted it to be. Celia expected to use her Marketing degree, along with the knowledge and experiences she gained in the field to benefit the company, and thus receive internal satisfaction; Marketing was Celia’s passion. Celia anticipated her roles: obtaining products, promoting those products, media attention, shepherding research projects, as well as being mentored by the Marketing Manager. However, her creativity, her passion and stellar ideas were suppressed when she realized that she signed a contract for the position of an administrative assistant.
“So, Ms. Harworth,” the Human Resource Manager said to her as they both sat in his office, “It is absolutely wonderful to have you as a member of this company. I regret to inform you, though, that you did not get the marketing personnel position right away.”
Celia was taken aback. “Wasn’t that the position on the contract? Because it’s the position I interviewed for.” Celia stated.
“No madam,” The HRM confirmed. Without allowing Celia to speak, she continued, “Because you have no job experience. We, at Joe’s Marketing Company, are allowing you to start as an administrative assistant until the other position becomes available again.”
For Celia, the benefits and compensation were ample, but not satisfying. Celia was now about to pay back her school loan, which she feared would increase doubly with the high interest rates. For a while Celia seemed happy, but the aspiration to achieve her goals of becoming an assistant marketing manager and being promoted to marketing manager in the future never ceased. On one of her encounters with the Human Resource Manager that hired her, Celia inquired about her promised promotion.
“Mrs. Boston, it’s been about four years since I’m working as an administrative assistant. When would I get the promotion I was promised?”
“Well my dear, Celia, I can’t tell, but you know that you have a big bonus to get soon. You’ve been doing so well at you job. You know, I’m looking at your file and you have been working here for quite a while. I see that you are in line for a salary advance,” the Human Resources manager noted with a smile. Celia was overjoyed with the good news that she overlooked her motive for visiting the Human Resource Manager’s office.
Celia’s life had met a turning point; the issue of money had become a growing trepidation. Celia's family problems began to escort her to her workplace and her performance suffered the blunt. Celia's life was no longer divided into four pieces, home, work, church and inputs. Added to her life was a fiancé, who had demands for Celia’s time, the demands of her sick mother, and increased responsibilities at work. Celia was still determined to get the position at the company that she initially wanted, but to no avail. She began taking longer lunch breaks, her punctuality and regularity began to diminish. The novelty of being a college graduate had begun to wear off and Celia's transition into the real world of work was not easy. To Celia, her life seemed to be intensifying with hardships as the days went on. Eventually, Celia had given up all hopes of being moved from her position. The stresses of life had begun to take a turn on her; no longer was she jolly and enthusiastic about her work.
It was nearing ten years and Celia’s inability to cope with the various activities had begun to drastically affect her health and her work. Her hopes of being promoted dwindled, especially after being rejected by the other two marketing companies in the small town. In addition she feared that she would remain an Administrative Assistant for the rest of her life.
Questions:
According to this passage what was Celia's Goals? Was it a real goal or was it just a fleeting fantasy?
What was the Drive that encouraged Celia to remain in her underemployed position for such an extended period of time?
What are some of the Celia's major stressors?
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
Hello there BaByLa1989! I, Kyllorac, will be reviewing you today on this very fine Review Day.
With that said, onto the review!
Overall, this piece reads mechanically and more clinically than anything. Judging by the questions at the end, this appears to be intentional, but there are some instances where your word choice is too unnatural and forced, and they're a bit distracting, to be completely honest. One example is this sentence:
The use of "escort" and "suffered the blunt" feel awkward and unnatural. It's almost as if you were trying too hard to make the word choice more unique and memorable, but it doesn't quite work because "escort" isn't really the best word to use in this case due to its more positive connotations. "Follow" or even "pursue" work better due to their more neutral and negative connotations, respectively.
As for "suffered the blunt", it's such an awkward phrase to have there considering how colloquial it is compared to the rest of the language in this piece. I'd recommend keeping the colloquialisms out of this and just stating things as clearly and precisely as possible. Something like "suffered as a result" feels more appropriate to me.
Another thing that might be helpful to reviewers is a bit of background on this particular piece. For instance, what is the age group this scenario and attached questions are targeted towards? Knowing the age group would be particularly helpful, as some advice with regards to word choice and focus will be different based on how old or young said age group is.
With that said, there were a few grammatical errors in the questions themselves:
This question has a case of verb-noun disagreement. It should either be was/goal or were/goals. I'm also wondering why "Goals" is capitalized for no apparent reason. "Drive" is similarly capitalized in the second question, again for no apparent reason.
Celia is a person, and so there should be no article ("the") in front of her name.
These may be little things, but considering the nature of this piece, you really do need to watch out for these little things since they undermine the professionalism of this piece.
thanks much
hi there..! hope you remember me..
its a good work.. i don't get why you have put few questions at the end.
i would like point few mistakes in this to you.
"she estimated that the job would be all SHE that she wanted it to be."
the capitalized she is unnecessary there.
secondly, "Celia was taken aback. “Wasn’t that the position on the contract? Because it’s the position I interviewed for.” Celia stated.
actually it must be, "because it's the position i was interviewed for"
"Celia's family problems began to escort her to her workplace and her performance suffered the blunt. Celia's life was no longer divided into four pieces, home, work, church and inputs."
if this line can be modifies as "Celia's life was no longer divided into four pieces, home, work, church and inputs. family problems began to escort her to her workplace and her performance suffered the blunt." it would give the meaning you intent to give there. because i couldn get what you were telling with no longer divided into four pieces. i had to read it few times to get it exactly..
but its a good work.. hope its not a comprehension as charlie II has mentioned below... it exactly portrays the dissatisfaction in work.
nice plot.
good description.
good work.
keep going
thanks for the comment
Hey BaByLa1989! This looks like a reading comprehension and the literary forums are only for original works. If this is homework then you should really do it yourself. If you need advice on techniques or how to answer questions, feel free to check out the Homework Help forum.
Take care!
my dear Charlie, i do appreciate your comment. It shows that I have some great skills is writing reading comprehensions.
It is my original work. thanks much for your comments looking forward to seeing more or your reviews... 