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18+ Mature Content

Prisoner

by BIHXY


Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for mature content.

Closed eyes never feel safe,

I am losing myself,

I want to break out this cage,

But where would I go?

The air is raw with need,

Extreme need to break out,

Sigh.

I just want to be free.


The prison warden falls asleep,

My key to freedom lies on the ground,

But where would I go ?

I reach out for it,

With trembling hands open my cage,

I am at an impasse,

To leave or not to leave,

I just want to be free.


The dried blood on my inner thighs,

Combines with a trickle of sweat,

I cautiously step out,

The bruises on my legs and arms,

Tear and  the scars reopen,

The burns on my fingers,

Sting with passion,

I just want to be free.


My legs fail and I begin to hyperventilate,

For fear of the coldness outside,

I step back in my cell and shut the cage,

Out along with my emotions,

Lock the cage and place the keys in the warden's palm,

He grasps them firmly and smiles cynically,

For he knows that even in his sleep,

I am his prisoner and I'm sentenced for life.


BIHXY




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User avatar
53 Reviews


Points: 40
Reviews: 53

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Thu Dec 03, 2020 3:35 pm
izzywidgeon wrote a review...



It's always sad when a marriage decays, and I think you captured it pretty well. I especially found it interesting that the character whom this piece is based around seems to have already grieved and accepted their fate as a prisoner. It's a perspective I don't really see a whole lot.
I liked how you compared it to being locked up in a cell/cage, like in a town jail. Could the warden be an allegory for an abusive partner? I still have a lot of questions about this piece, despite having read it three times. The language is somewhat vague (to me) but the meaning is clear.

You should be really proud of this; it's clear you worked really hard on it, and I'm glad I got the chance to review it.

-mintyleaf




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10 Reviews


Points: 828
Reviews: 10

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Thu Dec 03, 2020 6:10 am
woodpecker wrote a review...



if thinking of the title 'prisoner',i thought it would be of a person who has commited crime..but its totally opposite..so in first paragraph .you expressed the sorrow of the lady like you were the only one playing her role. you expressed situations of all suffering people ...how they want to go away but cannot . this poem express more than just a suffering lady pain. you wrote a very beautiful poem..i really appreciate your writing.
the last paragraph really adds charm to your poem..even if it represent the evil person..
you even characterised the evil warden beautifully.
thank you for reminding of what people are suffering in their quiet houses...




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63 Reviews


Points: 685
Reviews: 63

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Wed Nov 25, 2020 7:59 pm
NastyMajesty wrote a review...



Hello @BIHXY! I’ll be popping in here for a quick little review today, nice to see ya!
Okay, wowie. This poem was so powerful (and kinda dark xP)! This perfectly depicts the relationship of an abused woman and her relationship with her husband in such a “BAM” sort of way if you know what I mean lol. why do I always say lol in morbid situations— I especially enjoyed reading the last stanza. The metaphor you use about the cage and her emotions clicks really well into the rest of the poem. I don’t know why, but something about your use of the italics throughout the poem makes it seem much more mysterious and dark, so kudos to you for that! Anyways, overall, you did an amazing job, I enjoyed reading the poem so much! Keep it up and keep writing!
~The Majesty of Nastiness~
omg reviewing is painful on mobile send help--




BIHXY says...


awww thanks a bunch!!! that's so kind of you! ur comment really cracked me up!! thanks for blessing my day! (btw I feel you you about reviewing on a mobile!)



BIHXY says...


awww thanks a bunch!!! that's so kind of you! ur comment really cracked me up!! thanks for blessing my day! (btw I feel you you about reviewing on a mobile!)



BIHXY says...


awww thanks a bunch!!! that's so kind of you! ur comment really cracked me up!! thanks for blessing my day! (btw I feel you you about reviewing on a mobile!)



NastyMajesty says...


LOL no problem!




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