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Part of a play I call The Sword of Atlantica

by Armadian


The Sword of Atlantica

Characters

Josh,an adventurous outgoing kid that is a challenger and will give up

Matt,is a teenanger that doesn't belive things until he has seen it is John's older brother

Bob,is Matt's best friend but doesn't always think Matt is right all the time he is also Josh's older brother

John,is Josh's best friend and is outgoing just like his best friend

Act1,Scene1

JOSH

Hey John have you heard about the legend of the Sword of Atlantica.

JOHN

Yeah,my brother told me about it when I was little.

JOSH

Cool well I was wondering if you wanted to go to Greece with me in December.

JOHN

Sure can I bring my older brother so my parents won't worry about us.

JOSH

The reason I asked you about the Sword of Atlantica because

I think I know where it is.I should probably bring Bob with us to.

JOHN

I think Matt and Bob are at my house lets go see them.

Act1,Scene2

JOHN

Hey Matt and Bob we have to ask you a question.

MATT

What do you want?

BOB

Yeah what do you want?

JOSH

We want you to go to Greece with us in December.

JOHN

Don't you both have jobs?

MATT

Yeah,sure I will but than I probably have to work

overtime at Sears.

BOB

Same with me I will probably be having to

work at Menards overtime too.That means you

two have to do more work to earn your allowances.

JOHN

Sure I know I will.

JOSH

I will to.

MATT

Why do you want to go to Greece?

BOB

Yeah.

(Bob and Matt look at Josh and John interessted.)

JOSH

Well we want to search for the Sword of Atlantica.

(Both Josh and John look serious.)

MATT

What you mean that fairy tale Mom and Dad

use to tell us.

(Matt look like he is ready to blow.)

BOB

You two are crazy you actually believed that fairy tale.

(Bob is ready to burst on the floor laughing.)

MATT

You mean you want us to work are buts off to search for

something that is not even real.

BOB

Where is the proof that this sword from

the fairy tale is real.

(Bob is looking very curious)

JOHN

Well even if it is not real you could

take a break from work for like 2 weeks.

MATT

When you put it that way it makes me want to

go on a vacation

(Matt is looking quite interessted in this idea of John and Josh)

BOB

Well let us think about this for a while and we

will tell you are decision tonight ok.

MATT

Yeah,thats what we will do.

JOSH

Ok.

JOHN

Sure.

Act1,Scene3

BOB

We have made are decision.

We are just going for the sun and a break.

MATT

Yeah.

JOHN

Good.

JOSH

Yes I finally get to go and I found out how much each ticket cost.

BOB

How much?

JOSH

$250.00

MATT

Are you sure that makes a total of $1000.00

for round trip airfare.

JOHN

Whats the cost for the hotel?

JOSH

$100.00 per night.

JOHN

So if we added it all up for the whole trip it would cost us $2400.00.

BOB

That is a lot of money but I think we can pull it off.

MATT

We can.

JOHN

Yeah I think we can.

JOSH

Well than lets get operation go to Greece

and find the Sword of Atlantica on the way.

Act2,Scene1

BOB

Well its one week away can you believe it.

MATT

No I can't.

(Matt looks so enthused)

BOB

Well lets go and tell John and Josh to start

gathering the things they need because we

are leaving right after their school ends.

MATT

My Mom is doing me and Johns packing for us so you

just need to tell Josh.

BOB

Lets go pick them up from school and figure the rest out tomorrow.

(Bob and Matt leave in Bob's car)


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Comments



Random avatar

Points: 890
Reviews: 1160

Donate
Wed Mar 30, 2005 11:41 pm
Elizabeth wrote a review...



Gosh Greg, I can't believe you posted this... Freakin' Idiot! I have to aggree with the dialauge thing.... I had the same issue. You can't make all the people talk the same. Make one have bad speech or one use unreal words. Plot was overall still strange to me. With the current format (no bold, underline, itallic) it's hard to see when they are saying names and when it is a name speaking. It was good, not great... Take it from me as a friend and I'll poke you tomorrow unless you happen to be wearing metal armor.




User avatar
447 Reviews


Points: 2340
Reviews: 447

Donate
Wed Mar 30, 2005 11:29 pm
Duskglimmer wrote a review...



I think the story of this could be good, but the dialouge is extremely unrealistic. I don't know a single guy in the world that talks like this, let alone four. I think you should work on making the dialouge more natural. Try to think of things that you would actually hear someone saying, not just something that helps you get the storyline moving. Not every setence needs to move the story along. Give some dialouge that is purely background, show us the character of these guys. I think if you worked on that, this could be really good.





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