Inspired by two poems by Wilfred Owen: A New Heaven and The Next War (also an element of Dulce Et Decorum Est in there)
I step into gay fairyland
On the way, to get some gas for Mecca
Didn't think my laughter would cease
But looks like I didn't get the message
Nothing tender to be found
Only the thick stench of cattle
Slaughtered and divvied up
And sent off so they could wrestle
I step into gay fairyland
Nothing of note, no plans
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
I talk to the settlers
But they only appear to be memories
Ghosts stuck in marble slabs
We've never met yet they remember me
A full circle of men without names
Just ranks to distinct them from one another
They come here to talk, to somehow forget
Only to resorting back to their fathers
I step into gay fairyland
Nothing of note, just flags
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
I step into gay fairyland
Hoping to go somewhere more worthy
Turns out I will only end up staying
Fixed as a skeleton for all eternity
May as well not try too hard
If my death is the only certainty
My mother's tears will do, but she's not here
The only thing that can truly nurture me
On service: "I'd rather never come back"
Turns out I'll only die for a flag
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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Hi 567ajt!
This intrigued me a lot. First, of course, there are two meanings in the term, 'gay', happy and bisexual. I'm guessing that in this song/lyrics, it should mean happy, because I don't really find anything that related to bisexual in here.
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
Heaven is miles away
This repeating section is strangely, the piece that drags me in the most. 'Heaven is miles away'... just.. hard to explain.. but captures me right there. But I like this song/lyrics, every single word, and I would love to see it made into a song! Great, great, great job!
Thanks, and keep on writing ; mephis
The gay term: is it gay as in happy or gay as in bisexual??
Gay as in happy, i.e. reaching a place of eternal happiness; a utopia, if you will.
Nice- i was hoping it was this. Great job on the work though!
Nice- i was hoping it was this. Great job on the work though!
Nice- i was hoping it was this. Great job on the work though!
Nice- i was hoping it was this. Great job on the work though!
Does this have a double meaning about being gay? I don't mean it in an offensive way, it's just that fairy can be used as slang for gay(not sure if it is an offensive term). I really like the poem, I was just wondering if that was the double meaning.
Heggo!
Ok, so you asked me to review, here we go...
Since I know you have referenced heavily from the original sources on this one I approve greatly of the construction:
'I step into gay fairyland
On the way, to get some gas for Mecca
Didn't think my laughter would cease'
There's something really cynical about the tone of the song and it's kind of creepy. (But in a good way.)
It creates the sensation that there is no hope left:
'Nothing of note, no plans
Heaven is miles away'
So dark and intriguing.
Favourite line: 'Fixed as a skeleton for all eternity' You have imprinted an image of ghastly faces on my mind, frozen in time with a look of reproachful look on their faces.
C.R.E.E.P.Y < 3
I liked this song, though I felt it was missing a good pull in. Cause the opening didn't really call to me and tell me this is a song I should listen to. Next the tempo to me felt really slow, really sad to me, which is a good thing, in the song we find out that the Narrater is having a bad situation at home. Next I liked the details you gave during the song, how spirits maybe when we pass on to the after life. I'm sorry this isn't a really good review, but I'm new here so I hope you don't mind!