Published March 7, 2006
Catch the moon.
Reach for the stars.
Leap for a sunbeam in pools of darkness.
Your dreams can come true, if only you will try.
Do these special things before you die.
Parasail over a lake of cyrstal blue waters,
Ride a galloping horse through the rain.
Dance how you want, sing down a lane.
Make people doubt that you are sane.
Count your blessings, count every one.
Catch the moon, then you will be done.
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This is a very good poem. I liked it how as they said before you can kind of walk down the street and sing this. GREAT JOB!
I agree, I also like the carefree nature of this poem. It seems choppy to me though. I disagee with Angel17 as I rather enjoy that line...to me, it's the "sing down a lane" that made that disrupted the flow of that section. The rest is easily fixable if you only spend a little time playing around with the words. Such as contracting "you will" to "you'll" in the fourth line or changing "these" to "those" in the fifth line. Overall I like this piece.
The rhythm varied because some lines would be left non-rhyming, and then suddenly 3 lines will rhyme at once.
This line made the poem not flow as easily.Also crystal was spelt wrong.
But the poem itself had a good, uplifting feel to it. With nice imagery.
I liked this
It had a nice, happy-go-lucky feel to it, that is easy to relate to. The only verse that didn't quite fit was the 'leap for a sunbeam in pools of darkness', it made it go off track, and sounded like a different idea alltogether, but the rest was well done.

Good job