I've like never written poetry but I like chickens. I know I'm a little late but here is my chicken poem.
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Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
Wondered Little David Begg
See, David Begg wasn't too smart
He can't tell his hens and roosters apart
He did not know that chickens, on the scale of things, are new
But eggs, have been here since before things flew
But little David Begg didn't know that
So he went on wondering about all of this beneath his hat
and in the end, no one told little David Begg
Whether it was the chicken or the egg
He doesn't know to this day
But that?
That is okay.
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Canary word: Present
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125,027 Literary Works • 672,773 Reviews
I love your Poem. <3 I love how it actually rhymes unlike mine, I find it hard to rhyme feeling or anything. But your Doing great <3 Cant wait to read more of your work. I too like chickens, They are cute, I also like ducks and Geese <3 Feel free to pm/dm me if you want to talk about chickens <3
The rhymes we'll teach our children. "The story of David Begg". (I don't think the generation of our kids will be into this sorta thing but I'm just saying ya know?)
This is what puts this poem into that funny old tale category that your parents read you or you read it in kindergarten.Firstly, I like it!
Secondly, I like it!
Lastly, I LIKE IT!
I'd actually end my review here, but then you'd miss out on everything I have to say about all the goodies in this poem.
Everyone will know of Andrew the Bardand honestly, I prefer this to Humpty Dumpty!It's not just the humour here that makes it the kind of read suitable for a growing mind or anyone at all. It's the opening controversial question. The answer to which according to Darwin is the egg and you've revealed that of course, but people aren't very quick to believe and a question like this provokes a lot of thought. That's what I appreciate about the opening.
Another thing I //noticed// was... well, David Begg sounds like a symbol. I felt like he depicted mankind. How such a simple question is still debated over when the answer is already there. It depicts the flaws of Humanity. How we tend to get stuck on one thing and fail to move on. Of course, this is only my interpretation.
The way I've been interpreting the poem, I'd say that there's much sarcasm in this and it finishes with a final nail to the coffin of Human mediocrity. God, how far I can take my interpretations...
do kill me when you get the chanceSo, that'll be all. I hope you're happy with just how many ways this poem can be interpreted. I really love your style. Keep writing, peace out!
Yours sincerely,
Myth
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I'm glad you like the poem! I found your interpretation is extremely interesting. It is similar to where I was coming from. I love when people ask questions, I hate when they ask them not to get an answer, but to seem smart. My biggest grievance with philosophers is they keep asking questions without actually taking answers. Sometimes it seems like they would rather wonder than know, which I understand, but there are more interesting things to wonder about, things we don't have answers for.
Anyway, thanks for the review!
Hehe, you're welcome!
I like this poem, very funny! I feel like the last line was kind of short, so maybe "But that? That is okay." would have been better to kind of "extend" the life of the line a little. The comma between "that" and "is" is kind of out of place, but I get that you were going for a pause, almost like we are wondering if that is really okay, but then we conclude that it indeed is. So I would have maybe formatted it differently like I suggested above.
I think its a very cute take on this idea.
Overall, I'm a little sensitive to flow and some lines didn't seem like they shared the same rhythm as the rest of it, but I'm guilty of doing the same thing myself so I don't wanna seem too critical.
Also I'm sure there's some serious philosophical humor going on here that I can't catch, for example, "chicken, on the scale of things are new, but eggs are here since before things flew." Is that a reference to reptile eggs?
Is this poem making it seem like David Begg is 'not smart' for pondering these things, and the narrator is being a smart-mouth by saying "eggs obviously came before chickens" but doesn't understand that David Begg actually is wondering about the *concept* of which came first, the chicken or the chicken egg? Or is the narrator even smarter than that because they're thinking about the entire evolutionary perspective. AGHH -tears hair out- Is David Begg taking the phrase literally? I don't know! haha.
These questions are not trying to tear apart your poem, rather I'm just a simpleton trying to understand it
I like this quirky lil poem. It's great!
Thanks for the review!
I think that that is? idea is great.
Yes, and fish. Eggs are one of the oldest and most genius inventions of mother nature, but we act like they are owned by birds.
This poem was attempting to tap into two things, (A, My frustration at people continuing to ask questions like this, that we have answers for. I get the idea behind it, but there are so many more interesting and actually unanswered questions out there. A better question might be, which came first, Chicken or
chicken egg? Or, mother or child? And (B, It was also an attempt to tell myself it doesn't matter that much, and even if David Begg is 'wasting' his time on an answered question it's not a waste if he enjoys it.
Ohhh I see! Very interesting! I couldn't even sense the "frustration" because I guess you really did end it with humility (like, ok, let him wonder if he wants to wonder). That was great!
Heh. Heheh. Okay, this is nice. Hiya, I'm penn.
The humor is a little subtle, and for others, it'd probably be hard to notice. The spiritual essence of this little piece, however, absolutely dominate the poem.
I like it. It's smart, and there's a sort of familiarity with Little David Begg, if only because I'm reminded of Forrest Gump.
My favorite part of this has to be the last line. It gives out a pleasant feeling, that knowing isn't everything, and that it's okay to not know things about the world.
Or, maybe, I'm reading a little too much into a poem about chickens. Who knows?
You can never read to much into a piece about poetry. I'm glad you picked up on the spiritual elements.
That is what I was trying to communicate with the last line Little David Begg was happy wondering, so why should we stop him?
Thanks for the review!
ignore this, it lagged and now it repeated itself.
Hello Andrewknorpp,
This was such a funny poem to read. Very enjoyable indeed. I liked that David Begg had "egg" in his name. Very clever! Also, the ryhming in the poem added to the silliness. One thing:
"on the scale of things" seems out of place. But it DOES help with the rythem. To be honest I don't know what to do with it, so I'll leave that up to you.
Besides that, this was a beautiful poem, even if it was a bit late. I loved the silliness of it, it made it enjoyable to read! If you have any questions feel free to ask! Keep on writing and have a great rest of your day!
Stellarjay
Thanks for the review! Do you mean, 'on the scale of things' doesn't express the idea that chickens, though thousands of years old, like, compared to the earth, are super new. Or do you mean it's out of place in a different way?
It kind of feels like a hiccup. It just breaks the rythem up a bit.
Cool, thanks for the feedback!
np