Published December 12, 2011
They dressed you in
those golden robes,
wound flowers
in your hair.
You didn't want to
marry him,
who said that life was fair?
Your wedding bed,
the alter, bare
stone, rough cut,
there you wait.
He isn't coming,
your suitor.
Another seals your fate.
Iphigenia, girl
of tears, you lie
in silence.
Tarnished gold
robs drenched in blood, yours.
It flows in
rivers, black, they lead
you down to Styx
and beyond, to
meet your man,
your husband,
death,
your father's sordid friend.
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140,489 Literary Works • 673,249 Reviews
This was great! I liked the spacing and the structure, even the topic. However, I think there were a few, excuse me, randomly-placed words in there, such as "death". It could have used some longer, more poetic expressions, metaphors, or phrases. But you're off to a great start!
Gg127
Wow... A very different style. And I must say I do love ancient Greece. I love the way it reads. A little choppy but for a reason, like thought rather than speach. The spacing works great and looks very profesional. To be honest with you, I really can't find much I would fix. All the lines are the right length and all lead into each other nicely. And it ends at a time that works well, not too soon, nor does it drag on and on as some of my older poems have done.
All in all, it's a really great poem. And I applaude you for it.
Love the style.
Keep writing!
-Greena