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Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
This is well written.
Mostly because it's very descriptive, and this is what most poems are like, but you've made this one special.
But, I don't really get this.
If you could explain a little more what is about, I would like it a tinsey bit more then I do now.
But I ahve to say, very well done!
How old are you?
Keep writing, you certainly have the talent for it!
whoa.
this is a very intense poem, with a very intense theme. It has a grim and dark mood but an undertone of sadness and hearbreak. I don't read these kind of poems very often, so I don't know if my review will be of any use to anybody, but I'll try the best I can xD
I guess I'm wondering why you said "reminding me of D.Day" instead of reminding me of "the day?" or are you talking about an actual person?
And when you said "Time had. Stopped." it read kind of bulkily, like maybe you needed to say time.had.stopped. or with no periods or all. *shrug* but maybe you meant it to read like that?
Those are just the few things I'm wondering about. The rest was very good! I love the lines "in the darkness, swallowing the hollowness
you always left-
either way I'm left, alone"
keep writing!
~McKie