A little flower felt a ray of sunshine for the first time.
Responding to the natural attraction flowers are meant to have,
She began to unfold and bloom.
But when the petals peeked out into the light,
A storm quickly rose and beat her into the ground,
Leaving her shaken and afraid.
Before long, the sun was out again, reaching out with beams of light.
The little flower stretched herself to the sky,
Spending her strength in attempt to blossom.
Again, the clouds and rain appeared and overwhelmed the little flower.
Every time, she tried to get up again.
Every time, she was hurt by the storm.
Every time, she died a little more.
The quiet force inside her, the desperate desire to be beautiful and fulfilled, drove the little flower to spend her last feeble effort opening to the sun.
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Canary word: Present
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125,015 Literary Works • 672,845 Reviews
I like it tho i think you should describe the situations a bit more.
.
Depressing...hmm that just leaves more space for imagination, in my opinion optimistic endings put chains on that
Very sad and very beautiful.
I loved your relation between the flower and the girl
nicely done
Oh, how I can say "amen" to the idea of something just "flowing" out after an emotional experience. I'm just glad you're getting better!
And for once I've analyzed something between the lines without delving terribly off from the person's original intention! Yay! Haha, I should feel proud; that's like one of the first times that's happened. You must've gotten something of your experience into the poem, if I can pick up on that!
And yes, my name is, in all reality, Tarver. The reason you've never heard it before is probably because it's actually meant to be a last name, but my mother was a rather unique individual, let us say. It's great sometimes to think I'm one of a kind with my name... but the one problem is the name's meaning: bull. Isn't that depressing?
Keep up the writing!
~Bull
This little tale is kind of depressing! But that is likely your intention, I'm sure.
Anyhow... I think I'm getting over it. I don't know why I even put it on the forum.
out of it and say that this tale seems symbolic of a young girl wanting to bloom within the world, but the torrential storm of society and angst keep beating her back into her shell?
Thanks for the reply
I suppose it was... After a terribly emotional experience... I was so upset I thought I would never stop crying... I put my orange gel pen on a piece of blank paper and this little story just... appeared!
Is it wrong for me to analyze the peanut butter
Wrong? Nah. That isn't too far from the truth. Bravo, you've read between the lines!
~Tarver
Is your name Tarver? I've never heard that one before...
"Something."
.........Buhaha, just kidding.
This little tale is kind of depressing! But that is likely your intention, I'm sure. Is it wrong for me to analyze the peanut butter out of it and say that this tale seems symbolic of a young girl wanting to bloom within the world, but the torrential storm of society and angst keep beating her back into her shell? If not, you've found the key of a famous writer; ambiguity.
~Tarver
PLEASE
someone say SOMETHING
?!?!