Small farm

helloo!
nice poem! I like the rhyme in it and I like the imagery!!

Little fish in the pond swimming so free
The birds in the sky flying with glee
Spring has come and all animals come out maybe change one of the -come- into something else
For even the rat will come out and pout
The kittens will all tumble and play
While the donkey in the pasture brays, brays I think it'll sound better if you remove the last brays
Mother duck must teach her ducklings to swim
While the farmer fills the pigs trough to the brim
Little children that dance and sing
To the young blue jay with a broken wing
Young sheep lose their wool like silk
And momma cow gives her calf all her milk
The goat protects her young billy
And all the small fish protect one small blood lily
Raccoons teach their cubs to chatter and leap
While the old dog Clyde just watches all in a heap
But oh no! A wolf has just ran to the chickens coop
All the little chicks and hens huddle in a group
But alas! Before the wolf has any chance
The old dog made a growl so fierce that you could hear it from France!
The two stood staring at each other
The old dog had a young brother!
And before the wolf could run and hide
The farmer came along and yelled “Get him Clyde”!
The old dog bounded to the wolf and took his neck
And shook him to death, and left the hens to peck maybe change And into He?
All rejoiced at the death of the beast
For even the fleas were dancing on the deceased
All was happy and all was well
For the church even began ringing its bell
The little farm is for now
Just be ready for trouble with the new cow!

nice work!!
-qaralynn-

Hi there. First of all, lovely poem. I enjoyed reading it.
However, perhaps you could work on your paragraphing? It could just be me, but with your poem in a chunk, it lost some of its appeal since it looks like one big, long stanza. Seperating it would make it easier to read, and possibly help with the flow.

Spotted only a few minor mistakes.

Mother duck must teach he ducklings to swim

Spelling error. Mother duck must teach her ducklings to swim

But a vast! Before the wolf has any chance
The old dog made a growl so fierce that you could hear it from France!

Put 'a vast' together. So it'll be;
But avast! Before the wolf has any chance
The old dog made a growl so fierce that you could hear it from France!

I liked these two parts, and I'll quote them.

While the old dog Clyde just watches all in a heap

By saying this, I imagined the old dog all wrinkled and flat on the ground with his saggy skin all around him.

The old dog bounded to the wolf and took his neck
And shook him to death, then just left the hens all to peck
All rejoiced at the death of the beast
For even the fleas were dancing on the deceased

I especially like the last line of the above.

Good job. Keep writing!

Only two little grievances

You lost your rhyme scheme here:

Spring has come and all animals stir
From the mouse in the corner
To the horse in the barn

and here: (Here you went from an AABBCCDDEEFF... rhyme scheme to an ABAB one)

The two stood staring at each other
But to the wolves’ dismay
The old dog had a young brother!
Named Charlie McKay