Balloon

by Abigail_W.

Published July 1, 2010

I wrote this completely on a whim -- it took me no more than fifteen minutes -- so don't expect it to be marvelous.

Red latex hides behind spindly branches
Latex that once did not hang so sadly --
That once was beheld by beaming child
And parents happy to have a family.

Red latex sags, deflated by weather
Latex, once pleasing in ovular shape
Floating delightedly with helium innards
Soon unanchored by physics-intrigued child

Red latex withers, wrinkled with age
Once a glowing fragile face
Now elderly, waiting to die
An everyday example of corruption at its best

Comments & reviews · 4
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Butterfinger
Review
Butterfinger wrote a review Review · Dec 17, 2010

This one made me giggle to myself,

Soon unanchored by physics-intrigued child


I always see those stray balloons in the ceilings of stores that little kids have let go of and you painted that picture perfectly!
Brilliant poem about an everyday wonder! Keep writing!

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Angelheart
Review
Angelheart wrote a review Review · Dec 17, 2010

Red latex hides behind spindly branches
Latex that once did not hang so sadly
--That once was beheld by beaming child
And parents happy to have a family.
Red latex sags, deflated by weather
Latex, once pleasing in ovular shape
Floating delightedly with helium innards
Soon unanchored by physics-intrigued child
Red latex withers, wrinkled with age
Once a glowing fragile face
Now elderly, waiting to die
An everyday example of corruption at its best

this is very nice and innocent like almost a child talking sp its hit the spot where i am right now and thats very nice and sweet but other wise you need a little more detail and more imagary

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Abigail_W.
Comment
Abigail_W. commented Comment · Jul 3, 2010

I really appreciate the input; this is just a poem in the works. By the way, I absolutely love your icon -- Jimi Hendrix is the best rockstar of all time.

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ziggiefred
Review
ziggiefred wrote a review Review · Jul 2, 2010

Hello there
Thought I'd do the honors! :)
Anywho, this was an interesting approach to a poem. I liked the reference of the balloon to real life. I was distracted though by the repetition of "red latex". Maybe you should leave it out in the second stanza and start with "It", or something. But I think you did a pretty good job. Thought provoking. I really enjoy poems that make me think.
Good job



In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a hobbit-hole, and that means comfort.
— JRR Tolkien