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Published March 28, 2013
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Canary word: Present
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142,240 Literary Works • 677,070 Reviews
Hi Abid! I'm Skye doing a review for you.
This piece is really great. As it was said before,it's a tad but hard to read because of the lack of stanzas.
Also I would like to ask what type of music this would be put to if it's meant to be sung.Personally I see it as rap,just because of the little humorous buts you threw in there and also because of the way you switch from one thing to he next pretty effortlessly.That is a real talent!!
Otherwise..nothing to say! Great job!! Skyexxx
Hi there, Abid155!
I'm going to drop you a quick review here. Because I have something really important to tell you that could help you immensely in your writing life. We all know that judging a book for its cover isn't wise... or nice, but w hen it comes to writing, appearance is really important! And that is because when most people collide with a long poem like this that is all blocked up, they automatically become lazy humans and become less eager about reading it. What I am saying is that creating stanzas would help you a lot, because a long poem without breaks is like a skyscraper without windows. And that is not attractive! xD
So that's my advice for you. Stanzas! Hope this review is helpful.
~GeeLyria
Wow, I know that there's a message to this but one must read it several times in order to understand. I think that the flow is nice but some of the things seem a little confusing. I really like this poem and I do hope there's more. There were quite a few mess ups in spelling and grammar, but when you look over them again they will be easy to fix.