Two symphonies part two

by ANADIR

Published July 15, 2013

E - Everyone

In Two symphonies

PreviousNext

Three days later, Tabitha jumped out of bed. She sprinted to the appointed meeting spot, almost an hour early. When her instructors arrived, she was almost bouncing around. One of the instructors glanced at her. “Tabitha, what in the world are you wearing?” He asked, surprised.

Tabitha looked down at the armor made of light. “It’s my Light magic… It will light up dark places, and provide me armor!” She said.

“Well, don’t you think you should wear more than just leather armor? I mean, if your concentration brakes, you won’t have any defense, left…”

Tabitha shrugged, and sat down. A few minutes later, Blue Phoenix’s carriage pulled into the road. The four got in, and it rumbled off toward Delhi.

“Here it is.” The older wizard said.

Laxus looked at the small building. “You’re kidding. This small? Well, I don’t care. You guys go in; I’ll get rid of anyone who tries stopping us.”

The other two Wizards nodded, and ran into the building. Laxus sat down, and put his head on his hand. “The others shouldn’t need more than a few hours.” He muttered quietly.

Laxus sat on the stone patiently. After almost an hour, he heard rumbling. “Ah, there they are… The guild that Delhi must have hired to stop us from terminating the true evil guilds…” He said.

He slowly stood up. Then his mouth dropped open as a Blue Phoenix Carriage pulled up next to the bank.

Three instructors got out of it. “Tabitha, You stay in there for now, we can handle these weak mages.” One of them said.

Laxus burst out laughing. One of the Blue Phoenix mages glanced at him, but didn’t say anything. Laxus dropped into a fighting stance, and thought of a fitting tune for their death.

Then it came to him. He had recently discovered a new way to manipulate his magic, by making the shadow of the person widen, and wrap around the person, before melting into the ground, and taking the subject with it.

Laxus grinned, and began a long, slow tune. The notes rose and fell, and the wizard’s stood frozen, as their shadows were rooting them in place. “How… How can he make so many notes just by whistling? Not eve Tabitha can do…” One of the mages started.

Laxus whistled the final note, and the shadows launched up, and surrounded the mages. Right before the shadows dragged them down, A beam of light launched out of the carriage, and pierced Laxus’s shadows. A girl climbed out of the carriage.

She had rather childish features, with a rather round face, and only standing about four foot five, she looked like a kid. Laxus looked at her, and burst out laughing.

“This is the Best Blue Phoenix can cook up? Three old men and a little girl?”

The girl pouted. “I’m not little! I’m fifteen! And I just defeated your magic, so you should just surrender to me, and I won’t hurt you too bad!”

Laxus burst out laughing. “You? You’re not fifteen, I am! And, I won’t ever surrender to Blue Phoenix! You monsters killed my parents! Feel the wrath of one hundred shadows!”

Laxus whistled a sharp note, and the shadows of all the buildings near him jumped up, and turned into spears. They all launched at the girl.

With a note of her own, they were all enveloped by light. Laxus hissed. The looked at him for a moment. “You look really angry… but behind your mask of anger, I sense your sadness. Don’t even bother denying it, I can read emotions if they are strong enough.”

Laxus growled. “Shut up! He whistled three notes, and a humanoid made of shadows rose form the ground. The girl did the same, and a golden warrior rose from the ground.

“What would you have me do, Tabitha?” It asked.

“Defeat the shadow golem, and capture the Black Mage.” Tabitha said.

“Don’t ignore me!” Laxus roared.

The golem lurched forward, and its arms flew forward. The golden knight raised its shield. The shadows struck the shield, and suddenly stuck to it. “Myron! What’s going on, why aren’t his shadows burning away from the light?” She cried, worried.

Laxus laughed. “It’s a Secret art, the Shadow corruption!”

Laxus let hissed through his teeth.

The black shadow spread through the shield. The warrior threw the shield onto the ground. He raised the sword, and threw it at Laxus’s shadow golem. It struck the golem, and burnt it to a crisp.

Laxus whistled again, and the corrupted shield launched towards the knight, spinning so fast it looked like a disk. It struck the warrior, and instantly cut through his sword. It then hit his armor, and began to slowly cut away at it. The warrior screamed in anguish.

“Myron, No!” Tabitha screamed.

Laxus looked coldly at the glowing warrior, and then at Tabitha. His eye’s briefly softened. He sighed, and waved his hand. The shield stopped spinning, and collapsed to the ground.

The glowing warrior fell to his knees. “Why… Would a Black Mage show mercy?”

Tabitha ran towards Myron. She knelt by him, and put her hand to his chest. Light began bending around her hand, and entering Myron. Her back was turned to Laxus. A perfect opening. Laxus raised his hand, and quietly hummed a light note. A shadow snaked its way towards Tabitha. Myron saw it, and his eyes widened, but he couldn’t move his mouth because of his immense injuries.

The shadow snake made its way behind Tabitha. It rose to strike, and launched forward. Suddenly, it froze right at the back of her neck. Laxus was trembling with confusion. “How… I know I need to kill her… but I can’t! I can’t bring myself to land the finishing blow…gah!” He thought.

He released the shadow. Myron relaxed, and gave a barely perceptible nod at Laxus. Laxus sighed. Tabitha finished healing Myron, and turned to Laxus. Rage covered her soft features. “You monster, how could you do this to Myron! I’ll kill you!

She charged at Laxus. He raised his hand, and a pole of shadows rose in front of her feet. She tripped over it, and landed face first in the grass in front of Laxus. He sighed. He reached down, and grabbed Tabitha’s hand. He pulled her up.

“Why… Why aren’t you killing me? I thought Black Mages are merciless and evil…” She whispered.

Laxus shook his head. “I should kill you. But…” There was a loud crash from the bank.

Laxus hissed. “My partners are coming. Look, I won’t do this again, but I will let you live this time. Don’t move, ok? Tabitha nodded hesitantly. With a wave of his hand, and a light whistle, shadows wrapped around Tabitha, and her teammates, and sank into the ground.

Just as Tabitha was sinking, he felt two weights in his pockets. Before he could go to find what they were, the two mages that came with him ran out of the bank.

“We did it. Now quick, grab on, let’s head back to base.” One of them said.

Laxus grabbed one with his left arm, and one with his right. The older student used his magic to summon his transporting mist. It enveloped them, and when it left, they were gone.

Guild master Zoro nodded happily. “He fought and killed four mages from Blue Phoenix, and you got the treasure?”

The instructor nodded. Zoro grinned, and waved the instructor out of the room.

The shadows wrapped around Tabitha, and completely surrounded her. She breathed in sharply, just to test if she could. The air that entered her nose was stale, but breathable.

She stayed in the cocoon of shadows for a long time, but she couldn’t pinpoint the exact time. As she sat, wrapped in shadows, a small beam of light pierced the shadowy veil. Excitedly, she reached to it, and bent the light from outside into a knife with a whistle. She carved a hole through the shadows.

When the hole was large enough, she reached through it. When her hand passed through the veil, it the shadows sank into the ground. She groaned, and sat up. Myron was nowhere to be seen. Her guild mates were also climbing out of their shadows as well.

One of them, Jack, who was only a year older than her jogged over to her. “My Lord, that man was a monster! Are you OK?” He asked.

A soft smile crept onto Tabitha’s face. “I don’t think he is, at least not completely.”

Jack looked confused, but dropped it. “Well, we failed our mission. Not only did we not stop the dark guild, we don’t even know where their base is.”

“Can you call for help with one of your Whistles?”

Tabitha smiled. “I only brought one with me this time, a strange one that I made while asleep. I gave it away to somebody who needed it more than I did.” She said.

Jack sighed. “Great, Jeremy doesn’t have any transportation magic either; it looks like we have to walk to a stable.

Tabitha shrugged, and began walking in one direction happily. “Tabitha, the stable is this way!” called Jeremy, who was heading in the opposite direction.

Laxus sat down on his bed, his head in his hands. “How! Why couldn’t I kill her? This could ruin everything we have worked for! That blasted Blue Phoenix knows about me now… But, she didn’t seem evil…” He muttered to himself.

He lay back on his bed, and a fist sized rock rolled out of his jacket. He snorted. “She put this in my jacket? What’s the point of tha…”

He glanced closer at the rock, and saw some words. He wiped some of the murk off the rock, and squinted at it.

Flying Heron, eight o’clock tomorrow.

Laxus immediately slid the rock under his bed. “She wants to see me…why?” He muttered to himself. Nobody had ever wanted to stay near him.

He felt inside his jacket again, and grabbed the other bundle. He pulled out a small brass flute. Laxus’s eyebrows rose. He hesitantly put the flute to his mouth, and played a similar note to the one he used to summon a shadow golem. The shadows twisted around each other, and formed into a golem.

“How is this different from whistling?” Laxus muttered.

He blew a low note, and the shadows jerked forward. Laxus grinned, finally understanding the flutes usefulness. “It has a wider range of notes…that means more control!”

The next day came, and passed. At seven, Laxus made his excuses and ran out of the cavern. He found the inn, and sat down at a table with two seats. He sat down, and put his head on his hands.

About ten minutes later, Tabitha walked into the Heron. She was wearing a plain white dress. She glanced around, and saw Laxus. She headed over to his table, and sat down. “So, why did you call me here?”

Tabitha shrugged slightly. “Well, you looked sort of lonely.”

Laxus’s mouth fell open. “The whole reason you called me here was just because I looked lonely?!”

Tabitha shrugged once more. “Well, the other reason was I know what happened to your parents. Why? Because when we were fighting, you mentioned Blue Phoenix killed them in cold blood. So, I went to the library, and did a little research on the attack on Cedar Town 16 years ago.”

“What I found was that the dark guild Black Dragon attacked Cedar Town, but there were very few casualties, But among the casualties, There was a strange case. There was a couple that lived on the edge of the village, with their child. They were murdered by being quite literally burnt to a crisp by black flame. We know it was black flame for two reasons. First, it only burned them, and not the house, so it cant be blue or white flame. And second, the only recognizable feature on them was a black dragon head, the symbol of Black Dragon.”

“The child went missing, and nobody could find him. Black Dragon faded from the reaches of history, and became legend. My thinking is that you were that child that was lost.”

Laxus sat stunned for a moment. “How do I know you aren’t making this all up?” He asked.

Tabitha shrugged. “You know I’m not. You can feel it in your heart, can’t you?”

Laxus pretended not to hear. “So what you are trying to tell me is that I was abducted from my parents by Black Dragon, who then raised me like their prize boar?”

“Why on earth would they do that?” He asked.

Tabitha shrugged again “Well, they were too weak to beat Blue Phoenix the first time, so they probably needed a powerful asset. I am going to guess that you are that powerful asset.”

Laxus’s face creased. “You realize that everything you are trying to tell me is pretty much destroying everything I have worked for and believed in for my entire life?” He said quietly.

Tabitha gave a small nod. “I know this is a lot to take in. But, one last thing. You can always join Blue Phoenix. We won’t hold any grudges against you. And remember, don’t let them cloud your eyes with lies.”

Tabitha stood up, grinned slightly at Laxus, and strode out of the building. Laxus sat at the table for a moment, before standing up, and heading out the door.

Laxus woke up to the same dark brown walls that greeted him every morning. He sighed. He found that he was almost longing for the laughter and light that Tabitha seemed to bring with her. “Gah, what is wrong with me?” He nearly cried.

He slammed his hands on his head. But, still he considered the possibilities. He washed his face in cold water from a small pool near his bed, and headed to the mesh hall.

He put his plate on the slider, and reached for the box of mashed potatoes. As his hand closed around the spoon, he froze. “We don’t have a farm here, do we?” He wondered to himself. He returned his tray, despite the strange looks his peers gave him, and entered the kitchen.

“Bartholomew, the cook, was sitting on a stool. “Bart, how do we get our food?” Laxus asked.

Bart laughed. “Well, we head to the grocer in Delhi, and politely ask for some food. Then, after that, we take what we need.”

Laxus was relieved. “Then, we take everything we need, and a little more, and leave him alive.” Bart finished.

A rock settled in Laxus’s stomach. He stumbled out of the kitchen. Throughout the day, he continued to notice the little things. A word here, a reference there. It seemed as though the Guild had little to no care for those outside of the guild.

Comments & reviews · 3
User avatar
Deanie
Review
Deanie wrote a review Review · Aug 7, 2013

Hey Anadir,

A nice story this is. It has a very interesting concept, with light fighting darkness. It's great to see how their powers work and what they can do with it. Well there are a few things that could help improve this chapter...

Firstly, Tabitha and Laxus's emotions are really bothering me. Where are they? Laxus can't kill Tabitha even when he has an open chance. You tell me that he feels confused. But all you do is mention it. Please, pretty please, describe it. Tell me how he feels so frustrated he wants to hurl his fist through a table. Hasn't he killed many of the enemy before? What is it about this little young girl that stops his righteous thoughts and forces him to leave her alive? Tell us how Laxus knows it would be undeniably easy to watch the shadows squeeze the life out of her body, but he can't. He just can't.

Another great opportunity for emotion is when Tabitha is telling Laxus that all he's ever known is wrong. He takes it way, way to easily. Maybe he should feel more emotion. Tell us how he thinks of all the innocent people he killed because he believed they hurt him in the past. Tell us how he feels so alone, and betrayed, because all the people he has ever known in the Black Dragon have been lying to him all this time. Tell us more of his thoughts... And really, after that would Tabitha just grin and leave him? She basically turned his whole life upside down, and he saved her. She would probably have some more sympathy towards him, right?

Quick little nitpick: "Not eve Tabitha can do…” One of the mages started." I think you mean even.

So as a sum up, this story basically needs more emotion to be channeled in it. Don't just tell us what the characters do. You do that well already and we have enough of it. But tell us what they feel and think and see from their point of view. Keep writing!

Deanie x

User avatar
Lava
Review
Lava wrote a review Review · Jul 28, 2013

Hi there!

With this being review day, I'm taking a look at this chapter. Well, some comments may not make sense if it's related to details in the fist chapter, so I apologize before hand for that.

Anyway. here're my comments:

First thing - I love the idea of whistling and notes linked to magic. It's pretty awesome! Plus, I love how you described those scenes. It was nice.

I didn't understand why you mentioned Delhi here? The rest of the setting seemed off place, plus their names were also not very local, so there's a bit of a culture jumble in my head. Or are they new to this area?

So, a little on your dialogue. The first half seemed like you could work more on the dialogue. Make it a little less like "telling things through dialogue" and more of natural convo. The second half is much better in this chapter. It needs some work. Like :
"Laxus sat on the stone patiently. After almost an hour, he heard rumbling. “Ah, there they are… The guild that Delhi must have hired to stop us from terminating the true evil guilds…” He said. " This was very confusing. He said to himself? I think talking to oneself could be used as a great character building tool, but it doesn't work here.
Also, I saw 'gah' in two places in the dialogue. For me, I thought it was awkward given how they conversed the rest of the time.

You've probably detailed on Guild(s) in the previous chapter, so, right now, it doesn't really make the most sense to me. But, anyway.

Your characters seem interesting. I do hope you develop their quirks and personalities along the road.

Cheers!

User avatar
viadelleombre
Review
viadelleombre wrote a review Review · Jul 18, 2013

I don't like fantasy (at all) but this was kind of cool. I love the name Laxus - very interesting.
This sentence - 'Laxus let hissed through his teeth.' doesn't make any sense really. Maybe 'Laxus hissed through his teeth'? I did not read the first chapter so I don't understand the story really but I'm sure there's good background you've established to it. Seems like you could spin a lot of layers of relationships, action, adventure, and drama in this story you're writing. Keep on keepin on.

ANADIR replied · Jul 18, 2013

ack, that must be a typo. sorry... :P



It's a dramatic situation almost every time you answer the phone—if you answer the phone.
— Matthew Weiner