Quest to Kolob Chapter 1

I study my reflection in the mirror. Esme did a wonderful job minimalizing the paint on my face, as well as matching it to the color father picked for the feast tonight. I grin, my eyes land on my hair. It is down. It is finally down. I have been waiting for an excuse for months now for it to be down. Hopefully father won’t get mad. He may if he believes me every time I tell him I do not care for Acelin in a special way. However he does not so he should not be mad.

The servant’s door opens. I turn around quickly throwing my arm over the back of my chair so I can better see Esme’s flushed face. She comes in with a flurry. “Dae!” She whines tossing a small bag towards my chair. I laugh looking between her red cheeks and the apple that rolled out of the bag.

“Damir was there I take it?”

“He was. Stop teasing us like-“

“Us! So it’s an us now. When did that happen? Just last night you were telling me you didn’t think he thought of you more than he thought of ‘Kel who smells much like the chamber pots she empties’ Those are the words you used right?” Esme laughs. Together we plop on my bed. I glance out the window. The sun is getting low. The Notain and Acelin will get here soon.

“Well, he told me when he was picking out the finest horse feeding apples for you that he wanted to walk me around the gardens sometimes or meet me when I wasn’t waiting on your needs. He told me that he had been thinking about it for a while so he was pretty-“

A knock interrupts her. She slides off the bed quickly. I make it to my feet as she answers the door. My father’s personal servant stands there smiling at Esme. I bet Damir confided in him what he told Esme today. Then he bows and looks towards me.

“Rel Raothadae, Remhil Deerc and Rel Sivlen are waiting for you at the base of the stairs.” He says. He bows once more. Then he straightens and meets my eyes smiling as he does normally, that is when he is not carrying out orders. “You hair is very lovely down. I am sure Nitan Acelin will enjoy seeing you so free in front of him.”

“Rison don’t be so. You have heard the rumors well enough. You know this isn’t for him you know this is a show.” I laugh. I follow him though the hall.

“A show, almost like a bribery. Yes I know. Well I wish you the luck tonight. And if your wish does not come true at least The Notain and Remhil with start thinking of a marriage between you and Acelin. I would much prefer that than your previous suitors.” He takes my hand patting it gently. I look up at his smile wrinkled face. I hope he’s right, although I’d prefer not to have father and Notain think of my marrying Acelin, even if he is better than my other suitors. And that marriage would benefit the family more than any other marriages.

“Thank you Rison. I will have Esme let you know what happens in the gardens after supper.”

We reach the stairs and Rison blends into the background while I descend. I lightly rest my hand on the railing as mother taught me was proper. If all goes to plan tonight, next week I will not be here for supper with the Notain. Mother is the first to notice I’m coming. Her dark hair glimmers with the jewels braided in when she turns. Mother is the most beautiful Rel I have ever met or woman for that matter. She smiles warmly when she takes in my appearance. She is happy with the hair down. Now for father to see.

He turns quickly. I watch his eyes widen when he sees my hair, but then his lips slowly lift in a smirk. He thinks I’m taking an advance towards Acelin. I was hoping he’d think that for tonight. He may say yes to Acelin tonight then. “Raothadae, how beautiful your hair is when down.”

“I wonder father why you do not tell me that every day I wear my hair down.” I tease, before him and mother. Mothers grey eyes twinkle followed shortly by father’s jolly laugh.

“Well my daughter, it is not everyday you are wearing you hair down in front of the Notain, Notan, and Nitan. Especially the single Nitan who you spend every free moment of your life at court with.” Father gets back at me. I laugh.

“You are right father. Now let’s go out front and wait as custom. “I elbow him grinning just before I head out. Two servants open the giant front doors when I get close. Golden sunlight streams through the doors. A breeze blows the hair from my face and I feel like running and yelling in the sunset night.

Instead I stop one step down and wait for my parents. Looking over our little world on the estate I wish, yet again, I could paint well. I’d capture this moment, first stepping outside when the sun is setting. The light seems to illuminate everything although it’s fading. The green grass looks greener. Everything looks alive. I wish my windows faced the setting sun. Maybe then I’d practice the painting and get better at it.

“Mother,” I turn around. “You should paint this right here, the look from this door.”

“Dae you ask me to do it nearly every time we step out to greet the Notain. When will you just remember the beauty of the moment and treasure that?”

“I already do that mother. I am just thinking of the future and of others in this request. I can try to explain the beauty of this view. However, others may not picture it in all it’s splendor. Also your painting will give it more justice than my words ever could.” I smirk knowing I have won this little argument here. She and father laugh.

“Once again Dae you are correct.” Father pats mother’s hand in the crook of his arm. “Siv we have raised a smart daughter. She will do well when she is married and dealing with matters of the court.” Now I laugh.

“Father if you talk like that I will not.”

“Hush both of you I hear the wheels of the Notain’s carriage.” Mother quiets us quickly. I turn around to wait respectfully. A hand gently caresses my hair. I imagine Mother and Father’s smile. Soon the carriage comes in to view. While the Notain’s carriage looks nice I would not add it into the painting. They have new horses. They are young. They look like they are still extremely willful and free spirited. Soon they will not after being confined to those constraints time after time.

The carriage stops, a servant moves to open the door but before his feet touch the ground the door flies open. “Raothadae!” The Notain calls out jumping out himself. I bow my head in respect but he doesn’t see as he turns and helps Notan Ledell out of the carriage. She smiles up at our family.

“Raothadae what is the occasion?” Notain asks as he bounds up the stairs towards me. Notan follows laughing at her husband’s excitement. I keep my fake smile in place. Why in the world does Acelin always take forever getting out of the carriage. He does it to bug me.

“Nitan Acelin has not talked to you yet?” I question innocently. Oh wow it really sounds like we are getting married. With my hair down signaling I am absolutely comfortable with the people I’m surrounded by, it just screams that Acelin and I like each other romantically. Then Acelin talking to his father about something. Poor Mother and Father. They will be disappointed when they find out what it’s really about.

“Ah yes I see. Deerc, Sivlen. How are you doing.” The Notain moves on just as quickly as he raced up the stairs to me. Notan gives me a small hug then follows her husband to greet my parents. With neither of them distracting me I rest my gaze on the carriage.

Acelin still has come out yet. That man enjoys bugging me. I can wait. I glance around to see if anyone is watching me. They are not, well that I can see. Acelin is watching me from in the carriage I know he is. I make a crazy face looking straight into the shadows of the carriage that I can’t see. The carriage shakes.

Acelin emerges. He isn’t looking at me though. He pauses and looks down the road where they came from. Teasing me, acting like he doesn’t want to be here. He doesn’t know how much he would add if mother painted him in to the painting, especially the way he looks right now. Slowly he turns and looks at me. I suppress my grin just as he is suppressing his.

“Rel Raothadae,” He bows his head when he gets to me.

I curtsy back. “Nitan Acelin, how was your week?”

“Dae you are talking like the Rel’s at the court. I come here because I don’t want to hear that kind of talk. Say something different. Ask me about my odd dream last night or anything but that.” I laugh slipping my arm through his. He guides me inside.

“And here I though you came because you like me. Well we all get disappointments in life. How was that strange dream you had, whenever you had it?” I look up at him. His face it turned forward. Golden yellow eyes scan my home. I can feel the muscles in his arms relaxing as we go farther in to the house. He came because he likes this house. Half of his childhood was spent here.

“The dream?” I question again.

His whole demeanor changes. He tightens up again. Those golden eyes turn on me now. They don’t look to happy either. “The dream was an example of something to ask about. The last dream I had was more of a nightmare than a dream.”

“Oh I’m sorry, about the Notaindom?”

“No. What are we having for dinner tonight?” He flips our subject of conversation around. It’s a little frustrating. But there are never many subjects he doesn’t want to talk about so I suppose I can afford this one at least.

“I requested your favorite. I let mother and father think about that request for a bit. And then with my hair down I think they are expecting some sort of news or announcement.” I laugh thinking about what might be going through Father’s head. He may be thinking it’s finally the day. All of his daughter’s suitors have been run off by the Nitan. But here the Nitan is with his daughter. And she left her hair down for him and requested his favorite dinner.

“Oh good. And I don’t know what it is but it always seems to taste better when I eat it here. Your cook must be better than ours.” Acelin jokes . I look back up at him. He has a full smile on his fair face. His bright gold hair as always it pushed neatly to the side. Unlike the rest of the young males at court who think longer somewhat unruly hair looks good, Acelin has always stuck with the classic look.

“Yes, we have a better cook. Every time I eat at your castle it tastes strange and rather disgusting. I much prefer our cook over yours. Even though your cook is probably more knowledgeable about food in general. I am sure ours is pretty knowledgeable in the relationship between people and food.”

“Truly stated Dae.”

“Acelin doesn’t Raothadae’s hair looks marvelous down?” Acelin’s mother comments when we enter the sitting room. Acelin’s smile grows when he takes in the image of our mothers sitting next to each other plotting our life together. And our father talking about the future, hunting, and about our life together.

“Yes mother it looks beautiful. I was just telling Dae that she should wear it down the next ball. That she could become a trend setter for the other women at court.” Acelin makes up a conversation.

“And I was just telling him how inappropriate that would be considering I’m not married.”

“And I was saying that maybe it’s time she got married.” I glance up at Acelin. His eyes are glinting with this joke we are pulling on our mothers. I’ll go along with it. See what his plan is.

“And I was saying that maybe it was time that I got married.” By now we have our father’s attention too. Mother’s eyes are huge. I wait for Acelin to continue on.

“So I told her I could go on a quest to find her the perfect man so she could wear her hair down so I could see it, but it would be appropriate.” Our mother’s disappointment starts to show. Father stars talking to the Notain again.

“But I told him he did not need to go on a quest to find that man.” My heart hammers. This is so inappropriate this story we are telling. “I told him he did not really have to go anywhere to find that man.”

“Yes she told me all I had to do was look in a mirror. And I would see it. So then happy she was admitting her feelings for me I proposed. We are planning on getting married tomorrow. Then we will leave to travel the world for a while. I’m think across seas a bit considering everything going on with Toavar and Sarevetan.” Acelin announces. Everyone’s eyes bug out.

“Acelin I think that was a bit over the top if you are just trying to say what your mother wants to hear,” I pat his arm and sit down. Confusion crosses everyone’s faces. Even the servants who aren’t supposed to be listening, but always do.

Acelin chuckles. “Yes maybe it was a little too much. Sorry mother I was just saying what you wanted to hear. Though to answer your question honestly, Dae’s hair does look beautiful down. But she should not wear it down at any balls.”

“Acelin,” His mother scolds gently, but she’s still amused.

Acelin sits next to me and picks up my little writing book. Mother and Notan turn back to their conversation. The book seems so small in Acelin’s hands as he traces my engraved name on the front. He looks at me as if to get permission to open it. I shake my head nearly imperceptible. It’s my private thoughts. As much as I trust Acelin I do not want him to read that. Especially since there are thoughts about him. He takes my hand gently and lays it over the book.

I smile looking down at the book in my hand still covered with Acelin’s hand. His hands still look huge compared to mine. His calloused hand contrasts my soft barely used hands. He does so much with his hands, his hands are important. I do not do anything. He is the Nitan he can fight, he signs important papers for the kingdom, he blesses babes still in their mothers’ arms. What do I do with my hands?

I look up him. “If mother and father say yes can you teach me how to fight with a sword when we go?” I whisper hurrying my sentence for fear mother will hear. Acelin eyes come up with an agonizingly slow speed. His eyes twinkle when they finally meet mine. He will. A smile stretches across my lips, excitement filling my heart.

“Dinner!” I call. Mother and Father both look at me surprised. Then they see Acelin’s hand on my hand and the twinkle in his eyes and they smile.

“Raothadae,” Mother says softly then looks a Father.

“I suppose that is a fine idea. Why don’t we go in to the dining room?” Father tells the Notain. They share a knowing smile glancing at Acelin and I before we actually leave for the dining room. I nearly stand up before Notan stands up in my excitement. I wait though, then I wait for Acelin to stand. He turns and offers me his hand, motioning that I should stand before mother does. I take his hand and stand quickly.

I feel mother’s eyes on me, Acelin had me stand before her, I took over her role as hostess per the Nitan’s request. My hand in the crook of Acelin’s arm I start to lead everyone in to the dining room. I feel everyone’s eyes on the back of me. Their whispers are undistinguishable. I wonder what they are saying. If I cannot hear them maybe they cannot hear me.

“Acelin, way to act tonight. I bet father will not even wait to hear what you want to ask him tonight, he will say yes no matter. You have done a good job messing with their heads tonight.” I say under my breath. Acelin looks down a smirk lifting the corners of his lips. “Do not get to cocky though.”

“A compliment coming from you how can I not become cocky?”

“A life of constant compliments as Nitan. I am sure you should be able to handle yourself.”

“Yes, but you forget that Rel Raothadae the winter beauty has a way of making normal men fall over themselves to serve her. A kind word from her, men melt with affection.” I frown. He is stooping low to use commoners’ gossip to tease me. I can tease him back.

“That may be true. Need I remind you that you are no ordinary man. You are the Nitan of Summer. Your gaze cause women to burn with love. When your warm voice sounds women sway to the summer’s melody. I hear the Nitan of Summer is a fair man, one never to fall to the human emotion of arrogance.” Acelin’s smile only grows with my words. He’s just soaking it all in. I shake my head smiling at his foolishness.

“It seems fitting for Summer to bend to Winter’s will.”

“I am not winter.”

“I concede. There is no way the depth of Winter can compare to you.”

“How so?” I question quickly. We are getting closer and closer to the dinning room. We will not be able to finish this conversation. I will not be able to beat him.

“I do not feel inclined to explain at the moment. Besides, we are almost to the dinning room. Would you care for me to explain what I mean to your family?” We stop and stand to the side of the dinning room door while our parents go in and take their seats. We are silent until they sit. At the same time we step forward. Acelin leads me to my seat.

“I am quite curious what you two were discussing in such a quiet voice on the way here.” Notain comments once the first course is served. My eyes flit to Acelin as my face slowly heats up. He lets a lazy smile spread across his face.

“Are your truly curious father?” Acelin teases his eyes glinting.

“He is not the only one,” Father speaks up. I feel my face reddening now. I watch Acelin, his perfect court smile is in place now, and our parents are not buying one bit of it. My father, knowing when the Nitan’s mouth is closed there is no hope of getting anything out of it, turns to me. I stare at Acelin; I will break if I look at Father.

Notan starts to giggle quietly beneath her hand. My mother’s eyes start to sparkle, expecting what will not happen. Acelin lets out a huge breath and starts to talk, “I had hoped that we would at least be at the third course before I had to ask, but it appears now is as good a time as any.”

Father stares waiting for him to continue, but he doesn’t for that exact reason. Finally, Father complies with Acelin’s silence, “What have you need to ask of me?”

“Well as you know I was planning to take a routine border check this coming week. I wanted to take Rel Raothadae with me,” He starts to explain, using my title. He’s serious about this. Well I knew he was, it means a lot to me and he wants to make it happen. “It’s been Dae’s dream to travel for as long as I can remember. When we were young, still hiding from our tutor, we would crawl beneath the stairs and I would tell stories of my travels. I think now is the time she has stories of her own.”

Now I can’t help but smile. He put it perfectly. He didn’t give them anything to read into, contrary to what he has been doing all afternoon. The Notain smiles watching his son with approval. My parents look at each other barely hiding their surprise. This was definitely not what father was expecting. He, however, doesn’t look opposed.

“I think the time is now indeed,” Acelin’s grin breaks free but as father continues it becomes fake again and he stiffens in his chair, “especially considering that she will soon need to marry.” Acelin nods curtly. Is he okay? I know he has run off every suitor I’ve had because, I didn’t care for any of them. Is he worried that one will come back. Is he worried that our friendship won’t be the same once we marry? He must, because that is my worry as well.

“Well I’m glad that’s all settled!” Notan exclaims grinning at us, “Acelin has been worried all week about it. You should have seen him pacing in the meeting. Everyone was worried about him, thought he was going crazy.”

“Mother!” Acelin sounds exasperated. I just grin looking at him.

“Now a lot of things about Raothadae make since for this week as well.” Mother adds. I just laugh. Now Acelin and I can share in our embarrassment, but we don’t have to because it’s just our families, the Notain and Notan would be my parents if my parents weren’t.

********

I nod to mother as Acelin and I leave the sitting room. I don’t know if I’ve ever been so anxious to leave before. We have so much to talk about now that we know for sure that I can go with him. As soon as the door to the sitting room closes, Acelin and I take off. We tear through the hallways, laughing, as would children. Memories of our childhood flit through my mind adding to my already ecstatic mood.

I hold my dress up to my knees so I can run faster to keep up with Acelin. By the time we reach the garden he’s quite a few paces a head but I don’t care. We run straight to the maze and stop at the entrance. Out laughter grows now that we are no longer running. I look up at Acelin his eyes nearly glowing.

“You can come!”

“I can travel! I get to see something somewhere! Thank you so, so much!” I wrap him in the biggest tightest hug I can muster. He chuckles wrapping his arms around me. “This will be so great! Can I ride in a saddle like you?”

“I think we can arrange that. Now let me go before the servants have even more gossip to spread among the kingdom.” Acelin reminds me. I do not care, I know he is saying it because of how it will affect my reputation semi-negatively. I do not care one little bit. It does not matter when I can finally travel.

“I don’t give a devil’s inch. I can travel, thanks to you!”

Acelin laughs and twirls me lifting my feet from the ground as he spins. “I have to admit,” he starts after setting me down, I let go, “I am really looking forward to you coming with me. There goes the horrible day rides out in the hot sun where there is nothing to think about besides the sweat tricking down the small of my back.”

“Don’t talk like that! I’m going to be out there in the hot sun.”

“But it will not be as bad. You forget you will have me out there. And my servant of mine who you find hilarious, he will be there. We will take your maid. Maybe we can take that stable boy your maid is fond of so you two will have something to whisper about at night.”

“Yes, because all that ever fills our minds is gossip. You said you’d teach me to fight. Will you really?” I question as we wind our way through the maze.

“Do I regularly lie to you?”

“Ha, good!”

“Why do you want to learn to fight?”

I look down pondering the question myself. It was because he’s so good and he does some many good things I just want to do good things too. Is fighting how I can do that?

“Well I might as well right. We are traveling, we aren’t taking the whole court with us, the normal rules do not apply. I want to be able to do something that is useful. Acelin all I do it sit at home occasionally I make a drawing or send a letter. You do important things all the time. You sign documents for the Notaindom, you go out and bless children. I cannot do that. You are preparing to fight for a war. I can learn to fight like you, and maybe be of some use.”

Acelin stops walking and turns to me. He has a frown lining his face. His eyebrows are crinkled thinking. “Your trying to help, by being like me?” He questions quietly.

Am I? I guess I am, how else can I help? I don’t have much power. I could learn to fight and become a strategist, that way when war with Sarvetan does come I can be useful. I nod in answer to Acelin. His frown deepens.

“Dae you won’t be helpful being like me. You need to find how you can contribute. You have something else that I don’t have to help others. You need to find that and use that to help others.” His expression softens.

“How? I never do anything.”

“Lets figure that out on the trip we are making soon. As you said we will not have the whole court with us. We don’t have the normal rules to follow. We can do some searching for you.” Acelin decides. This is great.

“What if we went among the commoners in their cloths. So they wouldn’t be able to tell who were are. That might help me right?”

Acelin bursts out laughing, “Did you read that silly paper that was put out by that Tovarian writer?”

“Maybe I did.” I say indignantly. “But it’s a good idea! Besides, I am not going to fall in love with a peasant. It is a good idea though! Well dressing up as a peasant not falling in love with one. I mean nothing against peasants, I’m sure they are great, and I’m not saying falling in love with one wouldn’t be great but…” I stop my flustered jumble of words as Acelin snorts trying hard not laugh at me.

“Maybe you should stop trying to fix your mistake. I understood what you meant the first time.”