Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.
First Impression: Umm so this was a really intense medical situation here. I haven't watched any of them but this is what I assume medical dramas must be like. 
So this one was actually a really good depiction of Kate whose being put through some serious trauma by John's actions but other than Kate's character the other parts of this felt a little odd. Let me show you what I mean down there.
Anyway let's get right to it,
“His blood pressures dropping, Doctor.”
The responsibility for the patient was fully in Kate’s hands. New anxiety welled up in her. She didn’t need this. She’d had more that she could handle already tonight.
Pretty exciting start that you've got here. Definitely pulls us right into the story immediately without playing around.
“Get the crash cart in here!” Kate yelled, and motioned for a syringe to administer the medication straight to the heart. Her own heart was in her throat. Panic made her hands shake. For the second time that night, she was presiding over a dying patient.
The descriptions here are definitely doing a great job here showing how stressed and scared Kate must be in this sort of situation. Good job with those.
“Did you administer the clot buster?” He demanded, waiting impatiently for a reply.
Uhh..."clot buster" made me laugh far too much here. Not an issue just saying...it completely broke the serious mood for me...could of course just be me.
“Enough! You’ve wasted enough time already. Now get out of my way so I can save this mans life!” He spat, giving her a brief look of disgust.
Well that is some pretty unpleasant conversation among doctors. I'm not even sure if this type of thing would be allowed to happen in reality but considering how things happen these days this can't be too far from reality.
“Your gonna kill him John! You know that that medication is only used when dealing with a heart attack!” She grumbled, recalling a case like this years ago. Just the thought of it sent shivers down her spine. She could still remember what happened, and by God, it wasn’t going to happen again.
Nice job there again, you do a really good job immersing us in how Kate feels so that we can truly understand just how bad the situation is.
Their argument was interrupted by the sudden change in the patients heart beat. His vital signs seem to jump up and down before stopping all together. Suddenly the patient stated shaking uncontrollably then lay still. The life line went flat.
Well that was straight to the point...good job making it true to real life with that potentially lethal medicine. It gives the whole thing a lot more realism than if it was drawn out with drama added.
“You’re going to what John? Strangle me? Knock me in the head? Kill me? What John. What are you going to do?” She asked, giving him a sardonic smile.
“I don’t know. What are we going to do?” He asked, the color draining form his face.
At this point I've got to wonder where the nurses are because two doctors are definitely not going to be in there alone so this kind of conversation and fight feels like it shouldn't really be happening with the patients dead body just lying right there.
“That’s where you’re wrong John. I told you not to give him the clot buster didn’t I? But no, you had to be all macho and give him the damn medicine. I swear your nothing but a no good, self-centered, over confident…..What are you doing?” She asked, getting scared, but showing no emotion of it. He had her pinned between the wall and his body. His hands were planted to the wall on each side of her head, leaving her no room to move.
Yup that's definitely a very scary situation that you have portrayed right there although again I have to wonder what the nurses are doing letting all of this play out.
“I ain’t going nowhere with you John. You’d have to tie my hands behind my back and gag me before I’d go anywhere with you.” She spat out, emphasizing the word anywhere.
He just glared down at her for a moment. “That can be arranged.” He said before grabbing her wrists and holding them to her side. “Now you be a nice girl and you might not get hurt.” He drawled as he slipped a rope around her wrists.
Okayy...that was very sudden there. He went from enraged to all confident and creepy while a rope somehow magically appeared from the Duat. That whole part just completely lost continuity there.
You just wait John. You’ll get what’s coming to you.
Kate wasn’t heard from for a year.
Yaa this is just not going to happen in a real hospital at all. It's really over dramatized and some parts just seem highly implausible not to mention that very sudden change in character for John. However, you do a really good job writing Kate. Her emotions, fear here and then anger earlier were all conveyed really well.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
Overall: Overall it was a pretty interesting story and it would certainly make for a really awesome novel but it just felt a little odd there at the end like I mentioned above. Still it was written really well and it was definitely a really nice piece of writing.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
Points: 254163
Reviews: 4102
Donate