Published April 25, 2012
I'm full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of love
(4x)
I am full of something
brimming -something skimming
burning churning.
I am full of something
dark and dusty, musty
keeps of turning.
I am full of rage and
motion like an ocean
full of dry.
I am full of mud and
sternness like a furnace
full of sky.
Oh why, why, why am I so full of love for you
and why, why, why is the world so empty.
Oh why, why, why, is the world so full of love for you
and why, why, why am I so empty - empty - empty.
I'm full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of love
(2x)
You are empty of
affection - just protection
from you heart and
you are empty of its
darkness, soothing starkness,
got no art.
And you are empty of
connection, one dimension
missing out,
you are empty of
your sorrow need to borrow
strength to shout.
Oh why, why, why are you so empty of my love
and why, why, why is the world so full you won't accept it.
Oh why, why, why, is the world so cold to me, to me,
and why, why, why are you so full of what I need.
I'm full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of love
(2x)
Did you hear the story of the little girl who played at night,
she was beautiful in such an ugly way.
Her beauty lay in the squareness of her chin against the night sky
full of stars which burn like hell upon her satin skin.
Did you hear the story of the little girl who played at night,
she played silent hopscotch in the dimming streetlights.
She would sigh and howl a song and yearn for all to love her
then go home in the morning there'd be ink on all her sin...
Oh why, why, why am I so full of blood for you
and why, why, why is the world so spotless.
Oh why, why, why, is the world so empty, waiting for you,
why, why, why am I bursting at my seams,
bursting at my seams...
I'm full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of hatred
full of love
(4x)
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
141,299 Literary Works • 674,335 Reviews
Hi, Adam!
I look forward to reading more of your work!
This was really awesome, actually. I wasn't sure of it when I started reading it, but by the end, I could get a feel for the rhythm and type of music you would have with this. I find it absolutely fitting, and I think what you have here is pretty awesome.
Even the excessive 2x/4x was a bit iffy. But I read it with a quick beat, and it seemed alright. Well, the 2x did. The 4x is probably fine as well, depending on how the music is. I'm just curious how the 4x works as an intro to the song.
You have a remarkable way with words. All those rhymes and sentences are just... they flowed so well. I forgot many times that I should be paying attention to that, lol. You have a fabulous rhythm.
The main part about the little girl was really cool, too. And I feel like it all led to the ink on her skin bit, but I couldn't figure out what you meant by that and how it all tied in with how angry/loving this song is. I think that part could use a bit more work to better fit with the rest of the song. Just how the little girl exactly leads up to the message.
Even the repetition through the song didnt' bother me though, and I imagine this has a rock kind of feel. I went so far as to envision heavy metal, but rock is broad enough of a guess, lol. It just seemed work well from that perspective.
Keep writing!
Jabber, the One and Only!
I thought that this was interesting. Your word choice was really neat during the verses. However, i think just saying the full of hatred part once or twice with the (4x) or however many times you repeat the phrase would have been sufficient =] The one thing I hate about lyrics, including my own, is that when you just write it, people often aren't sure of how its supposed to sound, and therefor it doesn't give the piece nearly as much justice as it deserves. And often times with that, people say 'oh well this didn't flow right to me.' because they don't know How its supposed to go.
In all. I thought it was pretty good. I like the last verse (did you hear the story of the little girl...) Just because I sort of got this picture in my head of this girl with a really mischievous grin on her face walking through the woods or something. Also. I think it would've been cool to know what genre you wanted this to go into, just so we know more about what kind of emotion, pace, and what not you were going for.
Hopefully one day this sight has some recording tools! I personally would love nothing more than to be able to record all of my songs and be able to listen to other music on YWS. But that's all I have for this review. Good work =]