z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

speech for cilmate change

by seekingthetruth


climate change is happening and its happening fast. We need to act now because in 50 years the world could see over 1 million animals extinct and it will have disastrous consequences for the ecosystem.

protests are happening to make our voice heard to the goverments of the world but even this is not enough because no seems to make a change and that's why we need you to join the fight with people like David Attenbrough and prince William because their is no earth point 2. we get one shot and one shot only and it needs to count, otherwise our future is already determind, we die early. 

spread this message on we will not stop speaking out until our voice is heard because it is likeminded people like Donald Trump who think Global warming is a Myth but it is really not and it needs to stop. 

I am pleading with you to get your school , your family and your town involed to stop climate change and change the future , because whatever the future holds we decide it here and now and we can change the future because it is not set in stone like the past. 

help me help his great cause 

thanks 


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Fri Aug 23, 2019 10:19 pm
Horisun wrote a review...



Hello seekingthetruth. I agree with JJDodd, the content of this speech is important, and it's something people should think about more often, as we all need to pitch in to help our planet. You made several good points, and it's great that you are encouraging others to help save the Earth! I also think the last line in the fourth paragraph was well said.
There are a few things that could improve this speech a bit, though. First, there are a whole lot of places where you didn't capitalize things that should be capitalized, which isn't the end of the world, but would make this speech smoother.

Also, there are a few places where I think you should add commas, so that your not reading this like words pouring from a faucet. Hold your horses a bit, ya know? One sentence like this is "spread this message on we will not stop speaking out until our voice is heard because it is likeminded people like Donald Trump who thing Global warming is a Myth but it is really not it needs to stop." Okay, so, this line holds a great message, but it might be easier to read if you do it like this, "Spread this message on. We will not stop speaking until our voice's are heard, because it is likeminded people like Donald Trump who think Global Warming is a myth, but it is not, and it needs to stop." There are a few other sentences like this that are a bit run on, which I feel should be addressed.

Another thing, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think you're supposed to spell out numbers in things like this, right? Just something to mention.

One final thing, "help me help this great cause, thanks" Okay, so, I think the first part is great, but 'thanks' is a bit underwhelming for such an important message. And really, if you just cut out the thanks all together, that last sentence would leave a great impact, it's just weighed down a bit by that single word, it seems completely out of place! Though, in this case, it's really up to you.

Other than that, I think this has a super important message, and it has some great points, and amazing metaphors. Keep on writing, and have a great day!




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Sun Jun 16, 2019 9:42 am
JJDodd wrote a review...



Hey man! The context in itself was amazing. This is a serious global issue and a lot of people ignore it. It is sad that the world is actually coming to this. You told me facts I did not know before like in 50 years it could be possible that 1 million animals die due to this global disaster. I know global warming doesn't have anything to do with being grammatically correct but putting capital letters and maybe correcting a few thing could really help and make the piece more nice than it already is. :D. Keep it up and let your voice be heard!




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Thu May 09, 2019 4:05 pm
FabihaNeera wrote a review...



Hello,

This is a nicely written piece! Your message is conveyed really clearly and it sticks out to the reader in the very first line. I like how you get to the point right away in the first line to really make an impact on us. Overall, you have a strong start and end to this speech!

I'm sure this has been pointed out already, but make sure to capitalize the first letters in every paragraph. Also, this is just my opinion, because this is a more formal piece, I would recommend ending off with "thank you" than just "thanks" because I think that just makes it sound more professional and makes it end off in a stronger note. But like I said, it's just my opinion for how I would write it.

Now, my real feedback is to expand on those people you mentioned like "David Attenbrough" and the others. There may be some of us who dont know who these people are... or we dont know what kind of contributions or impacts they are making. So, maybe you could provide examples of what these people did to either influence readers to do the same or to make us aware of what's already being done for climate change. I think this would leave an even greater impact on us.

Anyway, that's all from me! This is a well written speech overall and I hope to read more from you!

Keep Writing. :)




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Thu May 09, 2019 3:46 pm
GigiNicole17 wrote a review...



Great speech!!!!

So first, I LOVE your username, and I think that this essay speaks for that. LiIke the other person said, there were a few capitalization errors, but nothing a little editing can't fix. I think right before thanks, you did well with the message, but I think it was supposed to say "this" and not "his".Despite the little errors, you did a great job isolating your writing task, and making that the focus of your speech. Some people tend to get off topic, but you did a great job at staying on topic. Great Job!

Keep Writing and Being Awesome
'~Gigi, The Jesus Freak




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Tue May 07, 2019 7:39 am
Tawsif wrote a review...



Great speech. Well done!

Just a few typos:

You probably forgot to capitalize the first letters here. Could be a technical mistake, I don't know!

'protests are happening to make our voice heard to the goverments of the world but even this is not enough because no seems to make a change....'

'No' should be 'no one' here.

I was inspired by this speech. But maybe you could add some of the things we could do to actually help the cause, like planting trees, using gas stoves carefully so that there's no waste of gas, and suchlike.

Keep writing.






thanks so much I love this society always great tips well done and yh my computer is supposed to spell check but doesnot



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Mon May 06, 2019 8:14 pm
seekingthetruth says...



PLEASE READ THIS. THIS IS IMPORTANT. DONT IGNORE WHAT WILL HAPPEN. LISTEN TO THOSE YOU WONT BECUASE YOU KNOW THEY ARE RIGHT. you know I am right you know ATTENBROUGH is right so if you wont do it for me do it fohim because he has done so much for the earth and maybe its time you helped aswell.





Writing is my soul made tangible on paper.
— bluewaterlily