z

Young Writers Society


12+ Violence

The Book Man, Chapter 83 (Revised)

by BluesClues


83 GOBLIN

The two spiders guarding the doorway moved aside with their pedipalps waving, as if bowing Christian inside, but he didn’t move. He couldn’t comprehend what he was seeing. The garden, yes; somehow it was easy to accept a garden growing underground, after everything else he had seen. But Imelda, here where Goblin should’ve been. Accompanied by spiders and a banshee and a night-mare, with a crow perched on her shoulder and hellhounds gamboling at her feet though one had swallowed up her brother so long ago.

And those eyes. He could not remember what color her eyes had been before, but he was sure they had not been blue—not blue like this: an untainted azure like a summer sky, beautiful but at odds with her snub nose and black mane of hair. He felt those eyes would seem odd in any human’s face.

“Imelda?” he said in a shaky voice.

She shrugged. “Well, she’s in here too. You should hear her cussing me out for taking her over like this. Incredibly rude.”

Christian’s head pounded. Something poked and prodded at the facets of his mind, not too pushy, yet, but not a friendly presence like Narodnaya. Something still older, wary in its age. It picked at pieces of his thoughts and memories rather than speaking to him.

Imelda cocked her head at him.

“Well, come in,” she said.

Christian’s legs felt like jelly, but he dug his fingers into his hellhound’s fur and wobbled into the room, past the spiders and the other hellhounds and up to the foot of the stairs. When he spoke again, his voice shook more than before.

“Goblin?”

The crow cawed. Imelda sat back down, fluffing her skirts about her knees. “Of course. I realize using a host can create confusion, but given your propensity for reticence, I thought it might help if you were able to talk to someone you know.”

“I…I don’t understand,” Christian said. His head felt fuzzy. It was hard to believe it was not Imelda herself saying these things. He was not sure what he had expected, but it wasn’t this. “How do you know who I am?”

“Oh, I know everyone who goes tramping above me. All their stories, all their thoughts, all their fears. Easy to hear what’s going on if you just listen.”

She stopped for a moment with her head tilted toward the ceiling, where the roots high above rippled like grass in a breeze. Christian listened. He thought he heard the sounds of the battle on the surface, but more than that—the shouts and thoughts and hopes of each person in it. He felt a stabbing pain in his heart, heard a shout of rage and grief from Graham Chelsea, the horse-master, as the contortionist Waylan Ryder was ripped open by an imp—

No, that was impossible. It was impossible he should hear all that, any of that, this far belowground, and yet—he shook his head.

The blue eyes glimmered as she watched him take it in.

“Hard to get used to, I admit, but extremely useful once you get the hang of it.” She leaned forward and gripped the arms of her dogwood throne. “That’s how I found out about you, you see. You can’t imagine how long I’ve waited to meet you.”

“To meet—me? But—” He looked at the knife in his hand. He had nearly forgotten about it; his head felt fuzzier than ever, and the unfriendly probing continued in his mind. The night-mares, he thought. And his hellhound. It didn’t make sense.

“I do apologize for that,” Imelda said, cutting smoothly through his thoughts. He looked at her stupidly. “Well—” with a look at the beast standing beside him, wagging its tail—“I won’t apologize for the hellhound, as you seem to have decided to make him your pet. I should have known it would happen eventually. But the night-mares. They weren’t meant for you.”

“The—” He realized with a thrill of fear that Goblin could hear his thoughts just as Narodnaya could.

“They were supposed to get rid of the others, that’s all. I knew they’d never send you down here by yourself. You are, as I believe they’ve discussed, not exactly the fighting type.”

“I…I came here to kill you,” Christian said faintly.

Imelda smiled, and it was not a pleasant smile at all.

“Let’s not be under any illusions about that,” she said. “You couldn’t kill an ant. You’re here because I wanted you here. You’re here because I wanted to talk to you.”

A voice rang out across the chamber. “That’ll have to wait.”

Christian’s head cleared as he swung about and saw Tirion standing in the doorway with his bow drawn. Morrow hung on his shoulder, looking as though he’d been drugged, but at least he was on his feet.

Imelda frowned at the sight of them. Rather, she frowned at Christian’s hellhound.

“What’s this?” she asked. “Did you even try to kill the elf? Look at his weapons. Utterly useless! A bow and arrow against a hellhound? Nothing could have been easier for you.”

The hellhound’s tail stopped wagging and it hung its head.

“Come on, now,” the accountant said to the hellhound in a shaking voice, “I’m glad you didn’t kill them.”

The beast nuzzled his face, leaving trails of glistening wetness from its nose all over his cheeks and jaw.

“Oh, for heaven’s sakes,” Imelda said. “Useless mutt. Get out of the way.”

“No, stay,” Christian said.

The hellhound looked back and forth between them, confused, and compromised by lying down at Christian’s side. Imelda snapped her fingers; the other three hellhounds bounded over. There was a yelp from Christian’s hellhound. It scrambled to its feet and backed away as the others snapped at its ankles and herded it into a corner with the help of one of the spiders. It snarled, but the spider jabbed it with its chelicerae. The hellhound’s yellow eyes grew stupid and sleepy and then closed as it fell over with a crash.

“No!” said Christian, but as he ran toward it, the other hellhounds growled at him and chased him back in front of the steps. Tirion loosed an arrow at the nearest spider. The spider let out a squeal, which Imelda silenced with an irritable wave of her hand.

“It’s only an arrow.”

“Let’s see how you like it, then,” Tirion snarled.

“Don’t!” Christian cried, but too late. An arrow went singing through the air and into her heart. The accountant held his breath.

Imelda looked at the elf with an eyebrow raised.

“Ouch,” she said. “What was that for, you foolish elf? Not even tipped with iron. Or were you showing off for your boyfriend?”

The blue eyes flashed and turned brown. She crumpled, rolled down the steps, and landed before them with blood trickling from her nose. The crow on her shoulder cawed in alarm and flapped away.

“Imelda?” Christian said. He took a step toward her, but Tirion said, “Don’t.”

Her body jerked and tremored for several seconds; the blood running from her nostrils tracked trails down her cheeks and ran over her lips even after she stilled. A wave of nausea swept over Christian at the sight. He bent over and wretched, but there was nothing in his stomach to throw up. He stood heaving and quaking, unable to look away from her body. His throat closed up. She had taken such care of Conrad, even when he had filled her home to the brim with balloon-animals—she had made Christian dinner, his first night in the park…

“He’s still here,” Tirion said, his eyes darting about the room. “Morrow, we should—Morrow!”

The Rover trembled head to toe as if having a seizure. His eyes flashed between their usual brown and the bright blue that Imelda’s had been—foam spewed from his lips—his trembling intensified—He fell to his knees and stopped shuddering.

“Morrow?” Tirion said.

He leaned down to help the Rover up, but Morrow raised his head and grinned like a shark, his eyes cold and blue. Christian took a step back from him, bumped into the nose of a hellhound, and jumped forward again. Tirion remained frozen in place. His fists clenched and unclenched at his sides.

Morrow got to his feet and looked down at his body, examining his own strong fingers.

“Oh, I like this one,” he said. “Strong, a good fighter—and yet so easy to take over it’s almost a shame. Too bad. I like a bit more of a struggle.”

Tirion turned his bow on the Rover.

“Where is he?” he asked. “What have you done with him?”

“Calm down. He’s still in here. Won’t be for long, though, if you don’t put that bow down.”

“Let him go,” Tirion said.

Goblin laughed. It was Morrow’s laugh, Morrow’s voice, and yet it was nothing like his voice: cold and careless, filled with humor as if nothing could be funnier to him than what was happening now.

“Or what? You’ll shoot me? It won’t do any good, you know. He’ll die with your arrow in his gullet, and I’ll switch to someone else.”

Christian curled his fingers tighter around the hilt of the knife that was useless until Goblin left the Rover’s body. His brain whirled in panic.

“You should have taken care of me when I was still in her,” Goblin continued, nodding at Imelda’s prone figure on the floor. “Of course, you still would have killed her, but—”

“I wouldn’t have wanted to kill her,” Christian said in a thin voice.

Goblin shrugged. “She’s dead anyway. Too bad. I liked her. Though she be but little, she is fierce. One of your writers, isn’t it?”

“Shakespeare,” Christian said automatically. He hoped, if he kept talking, Tirion might think of some plan to put into action, but a sideways glance at the elf told him this was untrue. Tirion was staring at Morrow with something akin to horror on his face. His bow hung uselessly at his side.

If only Narodnaya were here, Christian thought wildly. Narodnaya, or his spider, or if his hellhound wasn’t dead in the corner of the room—

“Not dead,” Goblin said with a grin. “Just out of the way. Spider venom isn’t enough to kill a hellhound. Pity. And before you get any ideas—” he continued sharply in response to Christian’s thoughts—“it’s not enough to kill me either.”

Perhaps it was the way he was playing with them, or perhaps the fact that Tirion, who should have been the one to rage and shoot and snap at him, seemed unable to do anything but stare at Morrow’s face. Either way, a spark of anger flared up inside Christian. His ears burned with it.

“Why don’t you kill us and get it over with?” he asked. While they wasted time down here, unable to hurt him, creatures who might have been friends with them under different circumstances were killing their comrades on the surface. If Goblin had not been in this room right now, Christian might have tried to talk down the spiders and other hellhounds, but he did not think they would listen to him with their master there.

“I could,” Goblin said. “It would be easy. Or I could have my pets do it for me, without so much as lifting a finger.”

The hellhound behind Christian growled low in its throat.

“But I like this body so much. And the elf, so lean and strong, and such glorious hair! Now, you—” He looked Christian up and down—“you, I admit, have not so impressive a physique. But the height would be useful. And you have such a kind look, and a smell about you—that would be the books, I imagine. If I wore you now and then I imagine all kinds would think me lovable. But that isn’t why I wanted you here.”

Christian turned the knife over in his hands absently. “What do you mean?”

“Do you really think me so different from the creatures I ally myself with?” Goblin asked. “Come now, Mr. Abernathy. You’ll make friends with hellhounds and spiders but not with me?”

“No,” said Christian. “I don’t think anyone would make friends with you.”

Goblin’s smile tightened on Morrow’ face.

“No? And why is that?” he asked. “No, no need to tell me. All you humans—all your type, everyone—you’re all the same. You’ll make friends with the fairies because they’re beautiful, won’t you? Colorful, twinkling fairies with nice voices and helpful powers. But when someone is as hideous as me—”

His voice had been calm before, but as he spoke it deepened with an anger barely concealed in Morrow’s face. It was as if a shadow had passed over the Rover’s features, darkening them, deepening them. The nose grew bulbous, the eyes deepened until their blueness shone out of shadows, the cheeks were thin and bony, the chin pointed. Christian squinted, for at once he was seeing in the face both Morrow and not Morrow, Morrow and something much uglier than Morrow.

“You’ve listened to everyone else’s story, Mr. Abernathy,” Goblin said. “Won’t you listen to mine?”

Out of the corner of his eye, Christian saw Tirion give the shadow of a nod.

“Alright, then,” he said. Perhaps the elf had a plan. “What’s your story?”


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Tue Sep 30, 2014 1:21 pm
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TimmyJake wrote a review...



Timmy here!

I threw in my introduction salutation a few days ago, but I couldn't get to it until now. All the other review requests and stuff. Yeah. But I am here now, so I guess... I guess I am not a total failure so far. :D

Let's get this show on the road.

I don't know really what to critique on this piece, because it is really good as it is. I really, really, really liked how Goblin was really Imelda, although Imelda wasn't Goblin, and yeah. How he could enter people's bodies and control them, using their voice and everything. It was a shocker - a big one - and I think it gave you the shock-factor you were looking for? (and dun tell me you weren't wanting one. :P ) Because even when I read the last chapter, and thought there was something funny going on, I wasn't sure at all... And now, when I could see it as everything was and with Goblin, I was really surprised. But in a good way, I promise. I love and hate what you did there at the same time, because while I loved Imelda's character and didn't want her to die ( :( ), it does add another fear factor and plot point to the book, and of course, Goblin's character. Always that. But it's something you are always doing, surprising us with wonderful character development and new twists to an already magnonminous (that is sooo a word) plot.

But while we are talking about Imelda's death, let's get one thing out of the way.

She had taken such care of Conrad, even when he had filled her home to the brim with balloon-animals—she had made Christian dinner, his first night in the park…


That doesn't do her death justice at all. She was an cool character. Give us more.

Now, while I am saying that, I realize that you can't simply halt everything and give Christian plenty of time to go over there and arrange a nice bouquet of flowers on her, and give her a salute and sing her a song (sorry. Hunger Games has swamped my mind), there needs to be something more. I don't know about Christian, but if I had been there and Imelda had been my friend (well, sorta. But Christian has always been very emotional with death and helping people), I would have at least been looking over at her prone figure and her still eyes all throughout the conversations. No matter how scary Goblin is, I think Christian would have still tried to get near her, too. To go over there and close her vacant eyes, to go and do something. I don't know. It's just like you went and held down the fast-forward button both on the scene with her death (although the description was fab there) and the emotion at the time, something you usually do very well with. So I think that is the place to work on with this chapter, but you already knew that, I'll bet. So, yeah. I think just having it a bit more on the forefront of Christian's mind throughout the scene would really help the reader. Really, to me, this was like Finnick's death in Mockingjay. Just a quick blurp, a bit of description - out. Over. Move on. And there needs to be more, maybe just one more paragraph over the next scene, but probably two. Just something concerning Christian's thoughts and feelings, perhaps one or two fleeting glances at her still body. Work with it, and see what you can come up with. You do everything right in the end, anyway, so this shouldn't be an issue.

I don't know what else I can say that won't simply copy what other reviewers have said. Just know that I agree with Livvy when she said that your description was the best in this chapter. Seriously, this chapter has the best description of any chapter in your book (not saying that your description isn't very good in the others. This one is just even more fabulous).

examining his strong own fingers.


whaaaaa? I am a confusing person, and that was even hard for me to understand. I think you got a backwards flipped word there. (hehe)

But that is all I could see for technical. I never point stuff out like that, but I just had to show you this one because I thought it was funny. :P

Onto the next chapter! Expecting more awesomeness. And a story from Goblin! yay
~Darth Timmyjake




BluesClues says...


Oops, I forgot about the "strong own." Woospie-daisy. Someone already pointed that out, but I never changed it....



BluesClues says...


Oops, I forgot about the "strong own." Woospie-daisy. Someone already pointed that out, but I never changed it....



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Thu Sep 25, 2014 3:47 pm
Deanie says...



Hi Blue!

It looks like we're going to get Goblin's story now, yay!

He could not remember what color her eyes had been before, but he was sure they had not been blue—not blue like this: an untainted azure like a summer sky, beautiful but at odds with her snub nose and black mane of hair.


That is by far my favourite description in this whole novel ;)

One question I have though, is how is Goblin able to hop bodies? Maybe the how isn't so important, but if he can do it now, I hope there is an explanation given as to why he couldn't do it before. If everyone always hated him because he was so ugly, then why couldn't he just swap bodies with someone more handsome? Solve all his troubles and none of this would've happened. I was just wondering as I read this... and I can't remember if reasoning is given later or not.

So just some food for though :D

Deanie x




BluesClues says...


Well, he could have swapped bodies with someone more handsome, but would you like to have to go through life pretending to be someone else just so people wouldn't hate you?

Anywho, what did you think of the emotion this time, in regards to Imelda's death and whatnot?



Deanie says...


Hm, maybe this should be something Christian asks Goblin so that all readers can know it?

Emotions are perfect <3



BluesClues says...


I will consider it. Thank you :)



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Wed Sep 17, 2014 5:32 pm
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Morrigan wrote a review...



Hello, BlueAfrica! I'm here to rescue your work from the green room!

I have read several other chapters of The Book Man, and I have enjoyed them all immensely. Your diction is fabulous, and your descriptions are often rather poetic (poetry is the best thing ever).

This chapter hooked me right away. I don't know who Imelda is because I hadn't read that far, but there is obviously a connection between the two that creates a terrible sadness when the elf has to shoot her because of Goblin.

I think that lingering on her death for another moment would be all right for you to do. I didn't feel too much emotion at the time-- unless you have Christian mourning her later-- and I think you could do with some more there.

Near the end, I feel like the dialogue becomes a little too dramatic, and I encourage you to look at Goblin's dialogue a bit more and take out things a supervillain would say (like "they're all the same" and so forth).

Good use of dialogue tags.

Altogether, I really like this, and all your writing makes me sigh with happiness. Sorry I couldn't give you more advice, but this is pretty darn good. Happy writing!




BluesClues says...


Thanks! Do you have a suggestion as to how I could possibly not-too-awkwardly add a little more emotion about Imelda's death here? It's already much expanded from the original, but if you think there needs to be more yet, then I will definitely look into adding it.

Although I should probably tell you, she was a character early on in the book who has been absent for most of it--she was helpful and kind enough and took care of Christian's injured friend, but she and Christian weren't terribly close--so with that in mind, is this enough, or do you still think there should be more?



magpie says...


Perhaps not. In that case, I would revise the sentence that says "%u201CImelda?%u201D he said in a shaky voice." It implies that he's got a lot of emotion about her, and I expected it to carry on throughout the scene. Perhaps in a disbelieving voice? It just seemed very emotional.



BluesClues says...


Alrighty. I'll have to think about it and see what timmy says when he gets this far, too. Because original readers thought there wasn't enough emotion (which was true, at that point in the drafting), which has been a consistent problem for me because I'm bad at emotion in real life and it translates into my writing, I think.



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r4p17 wrote a review...



Knight r4 here to give you a review mommy. (Can I call you that since I have kind have been grandfathered in unwittingly ish? ;) Anyhoots, I certainly hope that this helps you! :)

But Imelda, here where Goblin should’ve been.
Just one quick question. Why is "Goblin" capitalized? Is there only one goblin, or is that the goblin's name, or is it just a really important goblin that you decided to capitalize. The species/race may be capitalized (though I honestly forget), though it seems like you are talking about a specific one.

“I…I don’t understand,” Christian said.
Now I don't have a problem with this myself, but Therese told me that you are supposed to put a space in between the "..." and the next word, though I still think it should be the other way. ;)

;the blood running from her nostrils tracked trails down her cheeks...
A) How did she get blood there I the first place? Yes she was shot, but in the heart, not nose. You also may want to make this a little less gruesome. B) I would just start a new sentence here.

she had made Christian dinner, his first night in the park…
Based on this and the previous sentences it sounds like Christian likes Imelda. Why then would he come there with the "intention" of killing her and then be sad when that happens?

Morrow got to his feet and looked down at his body, examining his strong own fingers
I would invert the order of strong and own. It messes up the flow as it is.

“Where is he?” he asked. “What have you done with him?”
I am confused. Who is speaking in this sentence? Your pronouns here lack antecedents.

but he did not think they would listen to him with their master there.
[/quote][/quote] Just to make this sentence flow better I would turn "did not" into a contraction or put the not it in italics for emphasis.

Overall I liked this chapter. The description was good. I could just picture the setting, and yet the chapter was almost all dialogue. You managed to weave it in so well that the reader didn't even realize there was any description! :) The only thing I would suggest is that you include a little bit more action, though this chapter needed more of a dialogue emphasis I think. :P

I hope that I will be able to read more of this! I have seen this story in the Green Room quite often, but as of yet I decided not to review it. Now though, you kind of have me interested, even though I have no idea what this is about. :P

The idea of the goblin possessing people was a little bit strange, but it kind of seems to fit. They are just the sort of creatures that would do weird things like that. ;) The only thing is, it caused the death of Imelda :( Other that it was good. Happy writing!!! :D I mean "literally" :) write about happy things.

This review courtesy of
Image






Hmm, I don't think for this circumstance you're supposed to have a space after the ellipsis. And I'm always right. Blue, is he right or wrong? he's probably wrong as usual



r4p17 says...


Shut up, Precious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



r4p17 says...


Just kidding...but I still defy your laws of grammar.



BluesClues says...


Now, now, children.

Anywho, Goblin is the person's name (well, everyone calls him that), so that's why it's capitalized. Also, Christian came with the intention of killing him, not Imelda, but since Goblin is currently possessing Imelda that makes things kind of difficult just now. At the point that he says that, he's talking to Goblin-within-Imelda, if that makes sense. (Probably more sense if you weren't jumping in at the middle of the climax, but that's alright.)



r4p17 says...


Thanks for the explainations! ;)



BluesClues says...


Thank you for the review.



r4p17 says...


Your welcome! ;)




The moral of Snow White is never eat apples.
— Lemony Snicket