* This is an acrostic poem, where the first letter of each line spells a word.
Live suddenly, without thinking, wisdom once said
I run to find where I belong
Going fast, as the past trails behind filthy like the train of a dress
Hope awaits me in the distance
The luminous glow flickers, beckoning
Heart pounding, quivering breath
Out, outed, out of place
Unseen, happiness hunts,
Suddenly collides with running eyes, a surprise
Escape occurs when the light meets mine.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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125,015 Literary Works • 672,847 Reviews
Hey there, CollinWitte! I really like your idea with an acrostic poem because I haven't been able to find any of those on here, although I may just not be looking hard enough. I like the flow of this poem, although the amount of syllables kind of throws it off. Also, you use the word out a lot in the seventh line, the letter o. Maybe you could try to find another word, what that word would be, I have no clue. Other than those two little things, this is a great poem. Five out of five.
Hasta la vista,
DeltaEcho
Hello CollinWitte!
Nice poem! I really like it. I'm not quite sure what it really means, but it's good. I only found one place where the flow was disturbed, I'm not sure these errors are real or not, just please hear me out:
"Going fast, as the past trails behind filthy like the train of a dress" The number of syllables just throws of the flow a bit.
Also here, I think you could make a better word choice:
"Out, outed, out of place" You could say "ousted" instead of "outed"
This is your poem, and don't take my critique too seriously because it's a good poem.
~Kelpies.
I love it! I like the whole “LIGHTHOUSE” theme. Now I really want to write an acrostic poem! Very image filled, and captivating. The past/train of a dress metaphor was my favorite part. Didn't take many words to get me thinking. Definitely a good example of short and sweet. I hope to read more like this soon
Hi faith! Thanks for the review! Everyone is wrong my syllables are so magic stick.