Young Writers Society

Lol, this was awesome.

So short, so simple, but a lot of bang. This would go great as a cheesy pickup line.

Not much to say about it, as there's not much here to talk about. No nitpicks, so that's good. I can see how this would also apply to a romantic situation, which gives it a more interesting side than just a quick quote.

I can't comment on the writing, since there's not much writing, so, A+ there. If I was really desperate for a nitpick, I'd tell you to break the second sentence up with a comma, but I won't.

Thank you xxdarleneexx!

Short and sweet I like that.

I think it would flow better as a poem. That way, you could put breaks a pauses to draw certain parts out. For example:

You are the riddle,
I am the answer.

There are a few punctuation errors I'd like to point out as well. The second sentence would sound better as two sentences. One as a question and the other as more of an afterthought. I'm not sure if this is what you were going for, but it seemed more dramatic that way Something like this:

Now, why don't you just figure yourself out?
Because I want you to see me...

I really liked the idea of the poem, especially with comparing them to riddles and answers. I could just picture someone waving their arms around, saying, "Hello! I'm right HERE." It was very enjoyable