In the eyes on the people
Terror builds
So much they can't sleep
Can't smile
Can't live
They try to fight back
But they're too weak
They try to back down
But they're too strong
One spark sets off a steady flame
And the flame gets increasingly stronger
And they're shocked that one tiny, little spark
Could do that much
It's what they've wanted for so long
To see one, just one spark
And now that spark is
a beacon for hope
So, with hearts ablaze
And an unclear mind
They begin to understand what
"Revolution"
Truly means
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
137,563 Literary Works • 672,043 Reviews
Hi,
I'm a huge fan of The Hunger Games and I must say I really liked your poem. You were able to capture all the images in my mind from the story and I could see your poem as if the movie were in front of me.
I think that by repeating 'the spark' throughout the verses you were able to emphasize the whole message of your poem, how this spark is just the beginning of a "Revolution". I would just say that maybe to connect more with the reader I would add what this 'spark' consists of (without being blunt). Maybe add a verse of how these rebels' lives changed with this 'spark' and how it ignited them to start this war.
You transmitted a very clear feeling just from the beginning and I think that is something crucial when it comes to poetry. I immediately got a jab of sadness in my stomach from the first lines; but I loved how you were able to transform this into a feeling of hope just at the end with the last four lines.
Overall I think you did a great job!! Bye *three fingered salute*
Hey there, Abigail! Hunger games, eh? I loved the first two books! ( Don't get me started on the third one or it'll lead me towards a mini-rant. -_-) Anyway, I'm here to review!
So first off, I absolutely love the ending! It just wraps everything up. And I'd have to say my favourite bit was this:
There's a small typo here though, and you might want to correct that because it kinda ruins the flow of an otherwise beautiful emotion:
"on" should be "of" here instead.
Also, since you have punctuation in a few places (commas, etc) you might want to have periods, semicolons and the lot elsewhere too. Otherwise your poem has this incomplete feeling hanging about it.
I love how you stay so loyal to the central idea behind Catching Fire, and yet your poem has this... originality, I guess you could call it. It had this spark to it! (No pun intended.)
Overall, good job and keep writing!
Cheers,
~Pompadour
Hai there! Alex here!
OMG THE HUNGER GAMES <3
Ah hum...
I really like this poem, it really makes me feel like pulling out a big red flag and singing things...
I like the message in the poem, that an entire revolution can be set off by a tiny spark! Really good!
Just a few pointers to make this poem a bit better, after all, it wouldn't be a review then!
1.You need commas or periods at the end of most lines, poem rules
2.Some of the lines are very short and it looks very strange when some lines only consist of 4 words.
Besides that, this poem is really good! A very good fan fic!
If you want, ignore what I said, this is your poem after all!
Alex out, beep.
Thank to so much!!
Hello there, here for another review!
I loved this poem, especially since I love the Hunger Games as well, but apart from that it really was a good poem. I like how the whole poem is centered around the theme of fire.
This is my favorite part of the poem. I really like the "cause and effect" here, and I find these verses really memorable.
Again, it might be better if there was punctuation, but if your style is without punctuation, then it is also fine. I didn't see any obvious spelling or grammatical errors, good job!
Also I think that you should capitalize the second verse, for every other verse is capitalized, except this one.
But that was all the mistakes I found, and this was a very good poem. So congratulations and keep writing.
-AlfonsoF, member of the Apple Dumpling Gang
Thank you!!!
Wow... I can't even review this because I love it so much! I'm seeing Catching Fire in a week or so, and this just makes me even more excited for it!!! So beautiful, and it definitely connects with the main theme of the Hunger Games Trilogy. The words were short, but that was the beauty of it. I just loved the flow, the wording, and practically everything else. I think my favorite lines would have to be...
. The ending was also really great, and it definitely tied together the entire piece.
"They try to fight back
But they're too weak
They try to back down
But they're too strong"
Honestly... it was stunning. It really sums up everything, and it's so well written. Gah... I just love that line so much. Beautiful
Well, that's all I really have to say. This wasn't much of a review, but I just want to say good job. Loved it. Keep writing!!!!
Thank you so much!