Young Writers Society

Hello there, it's Kristina here

I feel very curious about your poem. It is very short, with only 3 verses. But still, it makes the readers think.

I think that this poem is perfect for the first stanza (paragraph) of a poem, so I would have really expected that you continued your poem. I think it would have been interesting, since the beginning sounds fascinating.

Everyone can interpret your poem in different ways, so I am going to tell you my point of views.

"I stare up at the sky
And remember the star
That used to shine."

When I first read this poem, the first thing that came to my mind was that you might be talking about a person, who is now dead, and now you are really missing this person, that you feel that void inside you.

So yeah, I think that "star" is referred to a lost person.


Or else, it could be that you are really missing your past. For example, a past relationship.

Anyway, I hope to read more from you!!

Okay, I'm curious! The title, "A Prayer," suggests that you're wishing for something or being grateful for something, but then the poem is so short and you're talking about a star that is no longer shining. So is it the lack of a wish, or the inability to attain a wish? What is this prayer about? This poem is highly evocative in the way it makes me wonder how much emotion it brings for three short lines. I think it's great! (And by the way, I approve of your profile pic; Clannad is the best anime ever!)

Hello!
This poem intrigues me.
"I stare up at the sky" by using the word "stare," you show that this is really important to you. Worth more than a glance or a futile once-over. It also is interesting in that staring usually means spending a long period of time looking at something, and this something happens to be the sky, which is straight up. This is generally an awkward position that kind of starts to hurt after you hold it for a long time. So not only are they spending a lot of time staring at the sky, there may actually be physical pain, and that would show the narrator's devotion to this star even further. I also get the sense that the narrator is searching, which is more active than staring, so you might maybe think about changing it to that.... But "searching" doesn't give the same "crick in the neck feel" as staring. That was a good first line that really let the reader know several important details:
-This is first-person
-That word "stare" that I already explained
-The reader knows the general location of the narrator, which is outside, staring at the sky.

"And remember the star" again, this has a lot of meaning packed into a short line. "Remember" is a word that I think of with mixed emotions. There are those sweet-as-pie memories, and then there are those dark ones that can make you freeze up. I like this connotation whether it was on purpose or not. "Star" makes me think of bright things, so the connotation is probably positive, especially if you're talking about a person.

"That used to shine" This final line brings such a sense of tragedy to the entire poem. It USED to shine. This makes me think that whoever the star was died, or at least changed to a much darker person.

I really liked this poem for it's deeper meaning and for its simplicity. It would be good longer, but It's nice the way it is.
Keep writing!
~Fortis

I think that this poem is about a person who thought that somebody important was the shining star in their life, then they went away. This brings on memories of nostalgia for me. It gives the reader a sad feeling, but for me, also a sense of closure.I h
WritersUnleashed you should writer poems more often. I like this one. (Hence the like that I gave this)
I hope that I found out the meaning of this poem.

With All Do Respect
Wholesomereader

Ok, I feel kind of silly trying to review a poem with only three lines lol. But nonetheless, you put it up , so you must want a review.

I do l like this, its really strong being what it is. It gives the reader a sad feeling. like "why isnt the start shining anymore?"

Im taken in by this poem, and I want you to write more, if there is more. Dont mind me ! If there isnt more that you can leave it as it. But I feel like you can do really well expanding on this.

Keep on writing!