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The Goddess Life Prologue

by ChimeraMania

Warning: This work has been rated 18+.

Have you ever thought about how life came to be? You ever think about how the gods and goddess got here? You ever thing about how God got here? Did you ever even think about what caused that big bang? You think that there may have been life anywhere before everything started?

I know how I came to be. I know of only one goddess and how she came to be. The other gods and goddess, there wasn’t really that many. God, himself, I have no clue, he didn’t come to be before me. The big bang, that was before him too, but way after me. I know, for a fact, that there was life before everything. How did I come to know this?

Well, the first goddess, herself, told me. Who is this goddess?

She’s the goddess of all the known and unknown of knowledge and wisdom. She searched everyday to find new and old things. She came to understand life and how it was created. Not why, we all know why life is created. Well, I believe life is created to bring changes. Changes are created when we are created. This Goddess, was one of known, and even the unknown. She was, is, a smart goddess. Even gives names to those unknown and make them known. How did she come to be?

She came to be by a single flick of the sun. One flick of the sun that touched the moon, thus becoming known. She was the child of a single flick, that was unknown and became known. How did she know she was unknown before she was known?

The stars told her tale, and to this day you can see her story mixed with others that where unknown and now known. If it started a change in the world, then it was told threw the stars. The gods’s tales, God’s tale, goddess’s tale, and even the big bang is told threw the stars. Who am I?

I am a goddess, the second goddess. Leah, goddess of wisdom, knowledge, the known, and the unknown. Mother to all her creations, but I wasn’t a creation. I am her daughter. How could I be her daughter that wasn’t created?

Well, she created her a mate, a love, out of life. She took a star and some moon and created someone who would love her. She created a fine gentlemen, who was known as hers and treated like a god. She named him Alvin. Alvin, god of love and life. Thus threw love, life, and mating, I was born. The first ever born child, not created but born. Thus starting a new generation of born children instead of created children. What is my name?

I have more than one name. Mother that I needed two so people would remember the second goddess of the world. Lena Arne, goddess of the unknown, love, and life. I don’t create people like Leah does, but I can see the unknown and make them known. From a castle to a cottage to a house. I build with love and care. How do I know this?

Leah wrote it in the stars for me. I watched how my titles came to be. I watched how I used them to help. So now I want to help. I will help by telling you all how Goddenia became known. What is Goddenia?

Well, what isn’t it. Its where we live. Its where life was first created. Its where everything that was unknown and became known. Who found it?

Why the first goddess of course, Leah. When she was created, the planet was created. Whats on Goddenia?

Well thats an easy question. Life is on Goddenia. Love is on Goddenia. The known and the unknown is on Goddenia. Creations and the born is on Goddenia. What will I tell you?

How it all began. From the sun flick to the moon. The creations of Leah. Leah’s first love. The daughter of Leah. Life within life itself. All the stories written in the stars. I come to tell a tale that everyone will love.

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289 Reviews

Points: 30323
Reviews: 289

Sun Apr 28, 2013 9:49 am
Caesar wrote a review...

Oh, this has a prologue too. Fail.

The first few paragraphs are an enormous jumbled mess, in my opinion. You speak of gods that came after God, and a God who came after the Big Band but before the other gods. Apparently he created everything, but not the big bang, which, incidentally, was what caused the creation of the universe and thus everything else. So he didn't really create much, did he? Perhaps I'm overthinking, again.

The prologue does clear up that who question in the first chapter, though. It also explains the lack of details, sometimes. The story of Leah is being narrated by another, I see. That could be an interesting narrative technique, however, it also looses immediacy, which is the flaw I pointed out in the chapter. It makes sense now that I've read the prologue, but the problem still stands. There's a lack of immediacy. Perhaps it would be better if it was the goddess herself narrating her story through flashback. Definitely an interesting narrative technique, but also immediacy. See what I mean?

This chapter itself, however, wasn't bad. Perhaps just a tad redundant if you choose to do what I mentioned in the review, but not bad.

Hope I could help

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229 Reviews

Points: 11589
Reviews: 229

Thu Apr 25, 2013 12:32 am
SushiSashimi333 wrote a review...

I thought that the beginning was a little unorganized, repeating things that were already answered but with a seemingly different answer each time. Starting with well sounds a little "funny" and doesn't help the flow all that well. The plot is creative and interesting, despite the minor issues with comprehension the way this was set up was pretty good. I shall go and read the next chapter now!

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Points: 690
Reviews: 1

Mon Apr 22, 2013 6:50 pm
Padlock says...

I absolutely love the powerful metaphores and imagery- this is really good! However, I found the writing style a bit juttery, as though the paragraph was swallowing up prickley words. Although short sentences create effect, they need a few long sentences to be created against. I would suggest throwing in a few connectives instead of seperate sentences every now and again, I find it always helps with me! ;) Other than that, it seems like an amazing piece of writing and I can't wait to read some more!

ChimeraMania says...


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10 Reviews

Points: 987
Reviews: 10

Mon Apr 22, 2013 5:33 pm
Calla says...

First of all, a common writing rule is to never, ever, use the word "you." It's not proper grammar.
Second, "The other gods and goddess, there wasn’t really that many."
Try this instead. "The other gods and goddesses, well there were not that many." The problem with this sentence is tense and another grammar rule. When writing, you should not (I am not saying you can not) use contractions such as don't and weren't. And your tense contradicted the first paragraph.
Third, "God, himself, I have no clue, he didn’t come to be before me."
Again, you are using contractions. And there are too many commas. There are many different ways to revise this sentence, so I will leave this up to you.
Fourth, "The big bang, that was before him too, but way after me."
Try "The big bang was before him as well, and still after me."
Fifth, "Well, the first goddess, herself, told me."
Try, "Well, the first goddess herself told me." This is just overuse of commas.

That's all I have for now. I will try to come back and do more, but I am running out of time.

Despite you sentence structure, I liked this. But I would change the rating, it doesn't make sense.

ChimeraMania says...

Thank you for your review and I will think about all of it

Look closely. The beautiful may be small.
— Immanuel Kant, Philosopher