Flame here! Apologies for ze delay. 
You never fail to amaze, don't you? I'm angry now because your writing's flawless and there's nothing to nitpick, and here I was, expecting to review. How foolish of me. So, I hope you don't mind my gushing. 
It occurs with most novels; the writer improves as the story progresses. They slip into a beat, establish a voice, breathe life into their characters. I don't follow novels if I know this'll happen; I follow novels because I don't see how it'll happen, how it'll be possible to slip things up a notch when you're already top-notch. You just proved the impossible possible. This's my favorite chapter yet, and it's only the fourth one, plus a prologue.
I don't think I even need to mention the fluency. Although I'd suggest cranking up the contractions, just the slightest bit. Their inexistence plays an obstacle in the flow.
Jacob stood there for a while, watching Lea’s dark brown hair blowing slightly in the breeze, until she was out of sight.
Check that the verbs correspond with the tense. Should be: "Jacob stood there awhile, watching Lea's dark brown hair blow in the breeze, until she was out of sight." You might've noticed I also clipped the preposition and adverb. Prepositions and adverbs are like snacks with high-fructose corn syrup as the first ingredient. They're tempting, but you should only have them in moderation.
It was hotter here than England, but luckily his clothes were light. He could still remember the grey stone walls around London and the river Thames flowing by.
I'm kinda ... "meh" on this one. Wand halves connected by the thinnest splinter, the splinter being "England." One half pertains to the weather, the other to his memories of London. There needs to be some glue so that we're not straining that splinter.
If he would ever come back to England was something he still had to find out.
This looks a little bulky. Initially I thought "if he would ever come back to England" was the introductory phrase, but then it turned out to be the subject, hanging on a splinter like the previous quote. But this time that splinter's a predicate, a helping verb: "was." And we're straining it too hard.
Fairly simple mend: "He had yet to find out whether he would return to England."
«Come and buy some wool!» A man shouted from one of the stands.
Whoa. Those quotation marks are epic. Where can I buy them?
On a grammatical note, dialogue tags shouldn't be capitalized, with the exception of proper nouns. You uncapitalized them at the end, so I'll assume you just ... forgot, maybe?
«You’ll find no better quality in the entire west!
"Better quality" should be "higher quality."
«I need some basic equipment. What do you suggest?» Jacob asked him.
The man has no idea where Jacob intends to go, what he intends to do, and what he considers "basic equipment." Unless the man possesses individual bags labeled "basic equipment," Jacob should be a tad more specific.
The man looked at his assortment, before saying ...
No comma necessary.
An animal skin to carry your water should be suiting for you as well.
"Suiting" should be "suitable" in this case, as it's playing the role of an adjective.
«All right, how much would these things cost?»
"All right" should be "alright," as it's acting as a parenthetical expression, and launches the sentences.
The man stroke his fingers across his chin, trying to find a price, «How about three coins of gold?»
That first bit doesn't qualify as a dialogue tag, so the comma after "price" is unnecessary. "Stroke" should also be "stroked," seeing as this's past tense.
He traded the gold for the objects, and Jacob gave a short: «Thanks,» in return.
This should look like "Jacob gave a short «thanks» in return" or maybe just "Jacob thanked him in return." (See semicolon lesson below.)
It looked like he was heading through a second gate, leading into another part of the city.
The phrasing suggests that the guard was leading into another part of the city. But I'd guess you're referring to the gate. The word "that" is handy in times like this.
a dragons breath
Forgot an apostrophe here.
The drink anointed his throat; in a weird and special way, one he had never felt before.
Semicolons! Oh dear.
Chances are, you know about independent clauses, but due to recent confusion, I'll assume you don't. Independent clauses are phrases that can function as sentences. They consist of a subject, predicate, and complete thought. For instance: "We were breathing hard."
There're two ways to connect independent clauses. One's a comma and conjunction. The other's a semicolon.
Correct: "We were breathing hard; it'd be quite a run."
Incorrect: "When I laughed; Johnny's mouth tightened."
Incorrect: "A breeze entered the forest; the kind that
However, semicolons are allergic to dependent clauses, as demonstrated above. There's a lot of confusion on this matter. In both incorrect examples, the semicolons should be commas. Not colons, commas. Colons are used for listy stuff, but I don't think there's any need to explain.
So: "The drink anointed his throat in a weird and special way ... "
This doesn't require a comma because the semicolon broke things off at a preposition. You might've heard the rule "add commas when you hear a pause." Ignore it, ignore it for the sake of humanity. The sad truth—writing's more about rules and numbers and formats than it is imagination. There's the dialogue tags you should monitor, and the number of prepositions per clause, and where to insert commas. Most of it's instinctive. Unfortunately, semicolons aren't in that majority.
Whew! Fun stuff.
It was… Wonderful. Absolutely, wonderful.
"Wonderful" should be lowercase, and there's no need for the comma.
It had an indescribable warm feeling
Should be "indescribably," as the word "indescribable" describes the ensuing adjective, ironically enough.
Overall, fantastic job. Keep up the good work! Looking forward to reading more!
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Reviews: 308
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