Wassup wassup wassup! Ossum here for another awesome review!
So let me say that you have a very unique writing style. It is very bold and direct with what you want to say and how you feel. A tone of emotion and a tone that makes sure we feel both the pain of the past and the hope of the future. It was eloquent and the pace was not to fast or to slow for the most part.
Critique, I do feel that in some parts of the piece, the tempo did slow down a bit to much. This did not effect the overall portrayal of the work itself, though in those instances, it did make them drag on ever so slightly. Second, the simplicity of this piece is good. It says what it wants to say and leaves thereafter. Which is good, but with every great piece of work, imagery and detail come hand in hand with the emotion and tone that you have so beautiful displayed. So be sure to try and collaborate with those two elements and I know that you will be writing masterpieces soon!
I can see great things! And of course, WELCOME TO YWS! SO GLAD THAT YOU JOINED!!!
7/10
Points: 419
Reviews: 34
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