z
Right there, in the red. Use Periods, Commas, Semi-Colons, Colons, and whatever else where needed. Anyway, I see that you're going somewhere with this, so keep writing."So we got in a fight, Elyssa" John said,
'Elyssa, I need a cig, do you mind if we go to the parking lot?' He said
The streets were brightly lit, something that hardly made an impression on me anymore. I sat in the cab, backseat, not making any eye contact with the cabbie. I had on about a pound of make up on, real hair extensions, fake nails, fake eyelashes, and clothes that cost enough to feed a third world country for a year. That was mostly because of Elyssa's sudden decision that me and her best guy friend John were a perfect match. She was sitting next to me right now, smiling at me, a thinner version of her. It was her clothes, her hair, her make up. It was her. Fake and shallow.
Why did I put up with it? Because, Elyssa was one of the somewhat popular people at our school. Shallow as I was, that mattered to me. I was sick of hanging out with my old friends, the friends that never put on a mask of make up and clothes that did not define them. The friends I so easily laughed with. But I had to stick with Elyssa. Elyssa knew people. Elyssa was rich. The only reason why we were in a cab right now was because they had recently fired their driver- but they would soon hire a new one. Elyssa threw parties for thousands of Dirhams. Everyone talked about her parties after they happened. I was at her last one, at her hotel. Yes, Elyssa's father owned a hotel. And she threw a 'My Super Sweet Sixteen' style party, with a DJ, champagne, huge dance floor, vodka, and about half the population of our school and some people from out of school. It was killer. Even then, I didn't like her much.
We didn't talk much as we reached Dubai Mall. There wasn't much to talk about. The cab parked in front of the Grand Atrium, one of the many entrances there. The fare read somewhere about 30 Dhs, which we promptly split. Then we made our way to the cinema. There were two boys waiting there. One was tall with longish hair and piercing blue eyes- that was Fred. The other one was a bit shorter, but still considerably tall with brownish eyes and brown hairthat was John, the half Brazilian half German boy that Elyssa was convinced would be my perfect match. Why? Because we both liked McDonald's. It was that simple in Elyssa's world.
John smiled a cocky smile as he saw us.
"Hey Elyssa." he said in a sexy voice. "And who is your friend?"
"This is Sophia." she said, a Cheshire cat type of smile spreading across her face. "Sophia only came to Dubai last January."
"Hello Sophia." He shook my hand. "I'm John, and this is Freddie."
"Hi." I said, my voice barely audible.
"Elyssa, I need a cig, do you mind if we go parking lot?" he said, with deliberate bad grammar, Dubai style. I didn't smoke. In fact, I hated smoke. It made me sick.
"Sure, why not?" Elyssa said. I didn't say anything. I just followed. I didn't want to be the party pooper.
Soon, we were at the parking lot. John took out a 'cig' and gave one to his friend. Then he offered Elyssa one. She shook her head. She didn't smoke. Yet. He offered me one. "No." I said, in a voice that came out colder than I intended. Oh god, what if he hated me?
"So we got in a fight, Elyssa," John said, speaking to her as much as he did to me. "Got pretty dirty. The other people got a knife. Injured one of ours. Had to take him to the hospital." I stared wide eyed. Was he kidding? Did this happen in Dubai?!
"Idiot." Elyssa muttered.
"Where was this?" I spoke for the first time.
"By Spinneys, Meadows." I could not believe it. Meadows was one of the neighborhoods where high class people lived. How could this happen there? He didn't seem to be joking.
"Gonna beat the crap out of that bratty idiot*. " John said spitefully as he sucked in his cigarette. Lung cancer. I thought. Elyssa laughed her fake laughter as she sat down. Wrong move- whatever she was wearing was too short. Way too short.
The streets were brightly lit[color-#FF0000]:[/color] something that hardly made an impression on me anymore.
Because Elyssa was one of the somewhat “popular” people at our school.
Elyssa was rich. The only reason why we were in a cab right now was because they had recently fired their driver, but they would soon hire a new one.
There were two boys waiting there. One was tall with longish hair and piercing blue eyes: Fred. The other one was a bit shorter, but still considerably tall with brownish eyes and muddy (Use your descriptions!) hair: John. The half Brazilian, half German boy that Elyssa was convinced would be my perfect match.
John smiled a cocky smile as he saw us.
'Hey Elyssa'. He said in a sexy voice. 'And who is your friend?"
'This is Sophia.' She said, a Cheshire cat type of smile spreading across her face. 'Sophia only came to Dubai last January.'
'Hello Sophia' He shook my hand. 'I'm John and this is Freddie'
'Hi.' I said, my voice barely audible.
'Elyssa, I need a cig, do you mind if we go parking lot?' He said, with deliberate bad grammar, Dubai style. I didn't smoke. In fact I hated smoke. In fact, it made me sick.
'Sure, why not?' Elyssa said. I didn't say anything. I just followed. I didn't want to be the party pooper.
John smiled a cocky smile as he saw us.
'Hey Elyssa,’ he said in a sexy voice. 'And who is your friend?"
'This is Sophia,' she said, a Cheshire cat type of smile spreading across her face. 'Sophia only came to Dubai last January.'
'Hello Sophia.' He shook my hand. 'I'm John and this is Freddie.'
'Hi,' I said, my voice barely audible.
'Elyssa, I need a cig, do you mind if we go parking lot?' he said, with deliberate bad grammar, Dubai style. I didn't smoke. In fact I hated smoke. It made me sick.
'Sure, why not?' Elyssa said. I didn't say anything. I just followed. I didn't want to be the party pooper.
Gender:
Points: 6717
Reviews: 100