Young Writers Society

Sweet dreams
envelop me
in their gentle caress.

Sweet dreams
in the night
will never be real.

Sweet dreams
touch me,
slash at me.

Sweet dreams
tear at my heart
and at my soul.

Sweet dreams
which I hope
will never be real.

Sweet dreams.

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again, any comments? help? suggestions?...

Simple, sweet (funnily enough) and a good read.

However, this isn't my favourite style of poetry, as it seems quite empty of any substance....and you read it so quickly it seems gone, and as most of the lines are repetitions it makes it feel even shorter. However, for this sort of short style it does a very good job.

i know what you mean... its def not my favourite
poem ive written... but i thought i'd put it here
anyway - i figure the more advice i get on poems
the more i'll improve...

it does look like it needs to be longer...

i agree with jack. it's not really my style either but even though it's sort of repetitive, i still sort of like it.