I write this slowly.
Each word engraved,
With the pain of my heart.
I can only think back.
Back to your hurt shouts,
To the tears in your eyes.
I can feel my own self,
Slipping and falling.
I hold onto hope.
That you'll forgive me,
For all the pain I have caused.
And as the words fall onto paper,
I can feel my heart breaking.
And I wonder if this pain
Is what I caused you a mere day ago.
The guilt eats me away.
What can I do to make it up?
I can only say I'm sorry, sister.
I'm sorry and I love you.
But you don't want to,
To hear those words.
I wait here anxiously,
Afraid to lose you.
I have to give you time.
To cool, to be able to see
That the mistake I made
Wasn't intentional.
I can't bear this waiting game.
I need to know now
if you want me to leave.
I feel so broken within.
But only time can heal
The scars I've caused.
I guess I can only pray.
Pray for you to love me again.
With tears in my eyes
And a broken heart.
I struggle to find myself again.
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