Dirty Jokes

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When you go out
to see your friends
every night and day,
something strange
in our comedic sense
makes us giddy and gay.

No, not gay
in the sexual tense.
Though, it can be about that way.
I mean in joy
and rediculousness
of the jokes we make amidst play.

It seems so easy,
it seems so quick,
and lazy and simple and fast,
but saying things
like “That’s what she said”,
can sometimes be a blast!

“Your mom” and “In bed”
are two other examples,
and I’m sure there are several I don’t know of,
but the childish discovery
of these petty phrases
are a childhood and teenage love.

I don’t need to think
very long or hard
on how to make these jokes,
but all the laughter
it’s meant to produce
makes it funny for all the young folks.

And the best part is
that it hurts nobody
to use these comical lines.
So if you don’t laugh at these,
then take off that tie,
and relax for a while,
because nobody said comedy had to be hard.
"I'm fearless in my heart
They will always see that in my eyes
I am the passion, I am the warfare
I will never stop
Always constant,
Accurate,
Intense"
"The Audience is Listening", by Steve Vai




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Howler wrote:but the childish discovery
of these petty phrases
are a childhood and teenage love.


This completely threw me off the poem; I don't know why.

The number of syllables changed from line to line, there's a lot of overuse and misuse of words in the poem, and the topic makes the poem less enjoyable. The language you used is very simple.. a bit too simple to me. I didn't get any feel at all from this poem, most likely because there is no feeling to be had from the subject. A change of topic in your next poem would be good.

Other than some very slight punctuation errors and misspelling of "ridiculousness," the grammar is pretty much just fine. This poem has the best grammar that I've read all day, really.

Anyways, it wasn't a big whoop to read, but it wasn't a bad experience either. Reading up on style of writing might do you some good. Keep practicing.
Technique is not necessary to express the emotions of the heart; poetic verse comes naturally through the soul. - StingDaFling




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Hello, I'm Kate. :D I don't write poetry, and have come to terms that I am not good, so I am not going to critique you. I just must say that I love how you teenage amusement into a joyful poem. You did a great job, and I hope to see more of your work. :D
"Sometimes it is said that man cannot be trusted with the government of himself. Can he, then, be trusted with the government of others?"

-Thomas Jefferson




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Gender Female
Points 1707
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This was amusing, I'll give you that. A little light and fluffy, which isn't always bad.

The only thing is that it seems like it could be a little more thought out, but the general idea was pretty good. That, and you misspelled 'ridiculousness'. I also didn't particularly like that the lines were broken up, like this,
Howler wrote:When you go out
to see your friends
I thought it disrupted the flow a little bit.

However, like I said, it was fluffy and cute.




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That was just...great! :lol: I love the rhyme scheme as well. But I must be honest...I probably use the phrase "That's what she said" at least five times a day. Yes, I'm very immature... :wink:

Seriously though that's a very insightful piece and I look forward to reading more of your poems!




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Hahaha that was halarious.



If you have a Kuzco in your life and they don't turn into a llama, bail.
— Alan SeaWright