Anna

...

Hello and welcome to YWS!

I'm interested in this Anna character... perhaps, in this poem, you can add a little more back-story on her? Sort of like in "Lullaby" by Shawn Mullins. In that song, he's describing this one helpless woman who is trying to escape it all, and he gives examples of what she's done and what she's doing now. So it gives us a better idea on who her character is.

For this, it would be the same thing. In order for us to understand Anna, we have to know more about her character, and by including some of her actions, besides her running, would help us do that. Ambiguity is only good if it's done right.

Hmm... it was pretty good, though Snoink has a good point: you could have mentioned more about Anna. At least mention more specifically why she was running.

Besides that it was pretty good.

Welcome to YWS, anyway.

from what i got, she is neither of these 3 choices. she sounds like a sad little emo girl who ran away from home because no one loves her.

im really not getting whats wrong with her, or why shes sad, or anything about her other than she is at home in a dark night.

try expanding more, as snoink suggested. and take a glace at my siggy. that quote basically guides my writing, maybe it'll help yours.

Thanks for that!
Anna is a vampire. She was turned against her will by a man she thought she loved, whose name was Simon Rambaldi. Her mother was taken from her when she was eight and killed. She was raised by her mother's waiting maid, Natalia, and her son, Daniel, whom Anna adored and thought she would marry. After being taken from the two to become a member of Simon's coven, a Russian vampire mafia that hunts Bounty Hunters and the royal werewolves, lycanthropes she became a Raven, a classification among vampires which means she eats without shame . She commits many murders and helps her master until one day she sees her childhood love, Daniel, and for a time she descends into madness. She tries to repent, but with Simon as her 'father', she is subjected to his will. When Daniel comes and virtually asks her to marry him, since he was changed into a vampire three years before. Simon sent his Raven to find Anna and before she runs, Daniel is caught in a trap, and he tells her to run on. She hears his death scream from far off and runs cross-country until she meets the sea. Years later she goes to Paris, still fleeing her former master, until she witnesses a murder in an alleyway and turns to see an onlooker, who turns out to be her lasting redemption, and leads her to victory.
Thought you might like to know, since I don't want to change the poem.
Which was written to be abstract. I thought it might be nice to leave the background to the reader.

In the heart of a heartless night
the black of the rain,
or the grey of the wind, never chills her. - Oooh.
To in rain, back in rain, colder than the water,
always running.
Never by snow, nor storm, is she touched.
Silence, silence, even by the toll of the clock tower.
Quick to smile, if smiling was common.
Hesitant to laugh, for no one would hear. Wow. What's happening?
Beauty, more than an angel of heaven,
sadness, more than a servant of the devil.
Black as a rainless night, white and pale as death,
sharp as pain, smooth as silk, red as blood.
Dark eyes, keen eyes, once full of happiness,
once, but no more. - What happened?
Longs for the warmth, mostly of love that was lost.
To her, the rays from the sun are unwelcome, for Shouldn't 'for' go on the next line
she is the daughter of a rainless year,
waiting for the moment when she shall meet her redemption,
staring her in the face, without shame or fear,
In the heart of a heartless night.

Her name is Anna.

Wow. I liked this poem, but it was very mysterious, suspenful. I liked it, and I hope you keep!

Thanks for that!
Anna is a vampire. She was turned against her will by a man she thought she loved, whose name was Simon Rambaldi. Her mother was taken from her when she was eight and killed. She was raised by her mother's waiting maid, Natalia, and her son, Daniel, whom Anna adored and thought she would marry. After being taken from the two to become a member of Simon's coven, a Russian vampire mafia that hunts Bounty Hunters and the royal werewolves, lycanthropes she became a Raven, a classification among vampires which means she eats without shame . She commits many murders and helps her master until one day she sees her childhood love, Daniel, and for a time she descends into madness. She tries to repent, but with Simon as her 'father', she is subjected to his will. When Daniel comes and virtually asks her to marry him, since he was changed into a vampire three years before. Simon sent his Raven to find Anna and before she runs, Daniel is caught in a trap, and he tells her to run on. She hears his death scream from far off and runs cross-country until she meets the sea. Years later she goes to Paris, still fleeing her former master, until she witnesses a murder in an alleyway and turns to see an onlooker, who turns out to be her lasting redemption, and leads her to victory.
Thought you might like to know, since I don't want to change the poem.
Which was written to be abstract. I thought it might be nice to leave the background to the reader.

Yeah, I got NONE of that from this poem. To me it's just about someone running through the woods at night with a negative outlook on things. I know you want us to make up a background for ourselves, but we shouldnt have to invent THAT much. Use what you just told us and write a story if you want, but dont write a poem this vague and then tell us an entire plotline we were supposed to have drawn from the poem. Evem if we werent supposed to draw all that from what you wrote, the poem is just too vague.

Goodness, thats a lot you left for us to assume. I'm sorry but there is no parallel between the poem and this story, it is far too vague. By any chance did you write this plot up in a story? If you haven't, then I highly suggest you do. This would all be much clearer as a fiction piece, not a poem.