Lost Children of Norway

Spoiler

Hello everyone. The tradgedy of the Norway Massacre inspired me (I'm a few weeks late, I know) to write this poem, in memory of the young people lost. I hope you enjoy it!

We did not know you –
Dear Children of Norway –
Until two Friday’s past:
When a hail of bullets
Shattered the peace
Of a beautiful camp
Full of beautiful people.

Your seventy-six faces –
Innocent, ethereal;
Capturing life and virtue -
Plastered television screens;
Fronted our newspapers,
Served as reminders
To treasure the ones we love.

This poem is for you -
Our Dear, lost Friends –
To say that you will always
Be deep within our hearts,
Throbbing within our souls,
Chiding us to live our lives
As if there were no tomorrow.

This piece is beautiful and well written. The imagery and the way you arranged the words are what's best!!!! I enjoyed reading this!! Keep writing!! This was also a good topic choice, the title made me stop and read your poem!!

I loved this poem! (I didn't love what happened) I loved your choice of words, the imagery... everything in it. The emotions in this poem are the same emotions that we all felt, especially since they were teens like us... and it could've been us (if we were Norwegian).

AmeliaCogin wrote:When a hail of bullets
Shattered the peace

AmeliaCogin wrote:
Plastered television screens;

AmeliaCogin wrote:Throbbing within our souls

Amazing Poem. Keep writing

Mac

I understand why you wrote this and I can't really say I like that much. I mean, it's beautiful in it's unique way, but poetry that takes it's themes from "current events" gets a bit old and annoying. Much like the people who wrote poems/lyrics and so forth on this site about Harry Potter just because the last Harry Potter movie came out.

Also, the words "innocent" or "innocence" used to describe people you really don't know is a bit absurd. If these kids were infants or toddlers, then it wouldn't bother me so much. But these kids were teenagers and it's just too presumptous to say that because they died that they were all "innocent".

I think it was horrible that those kids died, but I'm not going to say they were innocent because they died. For all we know some of them could have been perverts or cat killers. We don't know any of them and in my opinion it's absurd to call them all innocent.

R.I.P
All who died

Until two Friday’s past,
When a hail of bullets

Also, I think that the whole stanza that these lines are in is a little long. It's all one sentence and I feel like you could make it flow a little better and break it up into 2+ sentences instead of just one, long sentence.

Plastered television screens;

Plastered doesn't really seem to be the right word here. It's kind of blunt sounding.

And served as reminders,

Our dear, lost friends –

Great poem! You had pretty good flow and I loved your word structure! Any mistakes or parts you could make a little better/smoother is pointed out above in purple.

Good job with this Amelia

Keep writing,
Alzora

Wow, this is so great! Not only the rythm and flow but the entire message and the way you delivered it. So very, very good. I'm at awe! You're structure and line-length was good, your imagery was great and your content was just... AMAZING! I can't wait to read more of your works! *clicks follow*

A big extra plus for making such a fantastic poem out of such a sore and sad topic
Hugs and Heart to the Missed Children of Norway!!

Good Luck & Keep Writing

// Demoness