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Young Writers Society


crashing tears and there are no more smilies left to give...



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Sat May 28, 2005 5:24 am
Chevy says...



Wow. This poem really didn't seem like you. Don't ask if that's good or bad because you know me...and I don't know.

Heh, nice long titles...I'm gonna do that sometimes! :Jots down notes on left arm:

"Breathe, just breathe and please don't make me cry;
I've shed so many tears over people, please don't
be one of them. I want you to wake up
and be with me and be me and I'll love you
and everything will be better once you wake up."

Gosh. I loved that. It reminded me of "Breathe on Me" by Jennifer Knapp. Take that as a compliment...Jennifer Knapp is an exceptional songwriter/guitarist/singer.
when there's nowhere to go, it's time to grow up.
  





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Sat May 28, 2005 5:27 am
Writersdomain says...



Wow, I really loved that. Sometimes I don't really understand your poems, but I understood this one perfectly and I can really relate to it in some ways. Very nice. I have no suggestions
~ WD
If you desire a review from WD, post here

"All I know, all I'm saying, is that a story finds a storyteller. Not the other way around." ~Neverwas
  





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Sat May 28, 2005 4:41 pm
Incandescence says...



FUCK graduation
r.i.p. eric

I see the stars that are clear, have been dead for years, but the idea just lives on. I love you, but angels don't hear the words of hellbent little boys.
"If I have not seen as far as others, it is because giants were standing on my shoulders." -Hal Abelson
  





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Sat May 28, 2005 4:43 pm
Chevy says...



:raises eyebrow: I...assume this is another part of the poem? Anyhow, it's nice ;D
when there's nowhere to go, it's time to grow up.
  





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Sat May 28, 2005 5:09 pm
Incandescence says...



No. Last night was graduation at my local high school. I gave a speech. Blah blah blah. Eric was like, my best friend, and he was the valedictorian and stuff and I really liked him but never, you know, told him. Anyway, there was a party after graduation, and as he was driving there he got in a wreck and died this morning at 3am. I feel broken.
"If I have not seen as far as others, it is because giants were standing on my shoulders." -Hal Abelson
  





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Sat May 28, 2005 5:16 pm
Chevy says...



Wow...I don't know what to say really...it's kind of hard to say anything in situations like that. All you can do is like pray for the family and friends who were close to him ya know...and know that he's in a better place. I'm sorry to hear that...
when there's nowhere to go, it's time to grow up.
  





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Sat May 28, 2005 10:06 pm
Rei says...



I was going to say, "having some girl trouble, are we?" But I now retract that. Harsh.
Please, sit down before you fall down.
Belloq, "Raiders of the Lost Ark"
  





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Sun May 29, 2005 4:33 am
little x soldier says...



quite a riddle when I read the poem.. but after what you said.. too fast to figure out!

I want you to wake up
and be with me and be me and I'll love you
and everything will be better once you wake up.


be with me and be me.. what do you mean by that...( it'
s not what I tink it is, right?)

..better once you wake up... yeah it will be for him... If you care, it will be...
just remember him as you've known him...

Xia.. > "condolence"
~xS;o:L;d:I;e:Rx~
  





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Sun May 29, 2005 5:13 am
Areida says...



Beautiful, Brad. I agree with Chevy, it would make a great song. Awesome job.
Got YWS?

"Most of us have far more courage than we ever dreamed we possessed."
- Dale Carnegie
  





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Thu Jun 02, 2005 1:51 am
Misty says...



oh. wow. The poem is stunning brad, and I hope you feel better, you know, soon. god bless
  








Poetry is the art of creating imaginary gardens with real toads.
— Marianne Moore