Young Writers Society

"Watson, do tell me, what is your knowledge of the sixth of January?"

It was in mid afternoon on the fifth of January when my friend asked me this. We were sitting together at Baker Street enjoying the peaceful silence. Holmes was sitting, curled up in his seat, smoking away at his pipe while I sat in my spot, dozing off.

I was surprised by the sudden question and even more surprised by the oddness of the question.

"I'm afraid my knowledge of the date is limited to the obvious; that it comes before the seventh of January and comes after the fifth. Pray do tell me why you're asking, Holmes."

Holmes however did not enlighten me upon it though, instead he returned to his former state of silence and being lost in thought. This time the silence was not as light or as peaceful as it had been before. It was now a heavy silence filled with what almost seemed like disappointment.

Minutes passed along slowly and quick glance at my watch told that it was only a quarter past four. I needed to escape from the tense atmosphere that was surrounding me in this room. Fortunately the weather was, for once, warm enough to take a leave from Baker Street and have a stroll through the streets.

I tried to clear my mind of everything as I walked along the streets of London, but I could not help but to think over Holmes's question from earlier. There was something buried in between the lines of it that would not allow me to push it to the very back of my mind.

It is known fact that my deduction skills are not the greatest and when compared to Holmes's they are practically nonexistent. There were times though when they could be fairly decent and I would learn a thing or two from deducing.

It was then, as I continued to walk aimlessly around, that I wanted to give my abilities a try and see if I could deduce the secret behind the sixth day of January.

From the slight disappointment my friend showed when I told him that I did not know anything about the day proved that it might possibly hold a sort of sentimental value over my friend. Why that is remains to be a mystery for the time being…

It took me all of four minutes for the answer to pop out to me like a splash of cold water.

By simply applying my friend's method of eliminating the improbable and whatever being left, no matter how impossible it may seem, must be the truth. I have come up with a conclusion that is sure to be right.

I was so sure that the conclusion I had reached, though it was certainly surprising, was the truth that I would have sworn on my very own life.

Once it was all clear as day to me I passed the rest of the afternoon by dinning at my club.

When finally arriving back at Baker Street 221B it was late evening and my friend was still sitting in his chair but now seemed to be in a light sleep. I did not wish to take a chance at awakening him so I quietly made my way up the stairs and into my bedroom.

It did not take long at all for me to fall asleep once I had laid down and gotten comfortable. The next morning I was greeted by the sight of my friend drinking a cup of tea thoughtfully. I said a good morning to him and Holmes only nodded his head in my direction.

I sat down at the table and began to eat the breakfast that had been prepared by Mrs. Hudson. Through breakfast I took notice that Holmes's mood was steadily decreasing as each minute passed by.

Nearly half way through the meal Holmes shot up from his chair and made his way in the direction of his room.

"Holmes," I called out before he had left the room completely.

"Yes Watson?"

"Happy Birthday old chap."

I did not need to see the face of my friend to know that I had surprised him. His body language gave it all away. For once my dearest friend had let down his usual cold facade. It was pleasing to know that I had surprised the master of deduction.

I could tell by just looking at Holmes that he was both pleasantly surprised and happy that I had figured out the mystery of January sixth.

"Thank you, my dear Watson."

---
I hadn't realize just how hard it would be to write a Sherlock Holmes story... But despite some of the weaker moments of the story I do hope you enjoyed it and I would love it if you dropped a comment stating your opinion of it.

I really enjoyed this piece. It was written well and was entertaining.
Now! on to the comments!
I feel that you could have describe things more. London is such a beautiful that would be easy to describe the streets or people. Also the portray of Watson was impecable! Bravo! I loved how you stuck to his true character but yet made him your own in speech. You could definitely continue this or even make your own Sherlock Holmes stories. Ge eat job!

Hmm, you're right, the part where Watson is deducting and turning around and all that is a bit weak.

I was so sure ...Once it was all clear as day to me...When finally arriving back at Baker Street 221B (Also, you could just say plain Baker Street)

See? Those sentences just don't cut it for me. I know you wanted to hide what he had figured out from me (And truth be told, I had guessed it was the old birthday trick) and you could have done that much better.
The part about Watson leaving because the atmosphere was too tense doesn't sound like the English gentleman that Watson is. He needs to say something to Holmes, perhaps like "Just popping out for a bit, old chap." or perhaps you write action into it, giving the transition of scenes a little more...I don't know, but you need a better way to 'transition' it all.
All in all, it was okay, but you need to edit it a little more. Granted, I would epically fail if I tried a Holmes story, even a short one like yours, so you're on the right track. Granted it's mystery-fanfic, but not many people (to my knowledge, correct me if I'm wrong) try this particular genre, making this a good place for a well-written article.
What am I saying? Any genre is a good place for a well-written article.
Anyways, peace out.
Jenth

(You're doing a good thing here)

Ooh first of all I just have to say I was really excited when I saw that there was a Sherlock Holmes fanfic, and I wasn't at all surprised to see that it was by you. There are just a few little nitpicks I noticed...

Smiley_123 wrote:"Watson, do tell me, what is your knowledge of the sixth of January?"

It was in mid afternoon on the fifth of January when my friend asked me this. We were sitting together at Baker Street enjoying the peaceful silence. Holmes was sitting, curled up in his seat, smoking away at his pipe while I sat in my spot, dozing off.

I was surprised by the sudden question and even more surprised by the oddness of the question.

"I'm afraid my knowledge of the date is limited to the obvious; that it comes before the seventh of January and comes after the fifth. Pray do tell me why you're asking, Holmes." I love this part! It sounds exactly like something Watson would say.

Holmes, however, did not enlighten me upon it though, instead he returned to his former state of silence and being lost in thought. That whole part sounds a little awkward. This time the silence was not as light or as peaceful as it had been before. It was now a heavy silence filled with what almost seemed like disappointment.

Minutes passed along slowly and a quick glance at my watch told me that it was only a quarter past four. I needed to escape from the tense atmosphere that was surrounding me in this room. Fortunately the weather was, for once, warm enough to take a leave from Baker Street and have a stroll through the streets.

I tried to clear my mind of everything as I walked along the streets of London, but I could not help but to think over Holmes's question from earlier. There was something buried in between the lines of it that would not allow me to push it to the very back of my mind.

It is a known fact that my deduction skills are not the greatest and when compared to Holmes's they are practically nonexistent. There were times though when they could be fairly decent and I would learn a thing or two from deducing.

It was then, as I continued to walk aimlessly around, that I wanted to give my abilities a try and see if I could deduce the secret behind the sixth day of January.

From the slight disappointment my friend showed when I told him that I did not know anything about the day proved that it might possibly hold a sort of sentimental value over my friend. Why that is remains to be a mystery for the time being… This whole sentence doesn't work for me. It just sounds a little too confusing.

It took me all of four minutes for the answer to pop out to me like a splash of cold water.

By simply applying my friend's method of eliminating the improbable and whatever being left, no matter how impossible it may seem, must be the truth. This was kind of a hang-on sentence; when you read it aloud, you expect to hear something else at the end, instead of an abrupt stop. I have Are you narrating this story in the past or present tense? It's not consistent. come up with a conclusion that is sure to be right.

I was so sure that the conclusion I had reached, though it was certainly surprising, was the truth that I would have sworn on my very own life.

Once it was all clear as day to me I passed the rest of the afternoon by dinning at my club.

When finally arriving back at Baker Street 221B it was late evening and my friend was still sitting in his chair but now seemed to be in a light sleep. I did not wish to take a chance at awakening him so I quietly made my way up the stairs and into my bedroom.

It did not take long at all for me to fall asleep once I had laid down and gotten comfortable. The next morning I was greeted by the sight of my friend drinking a cup of tea thoughtfully. I said a good morning to him and Holmes only nodded his head in my direction.

I sat down at the table and began to eat the breakfast that had been prepared by Mrs. Hudson. Through breakfast I took notice that Holmes's mood was steadily decreasing as each minute passed by.

Nearly half way through the meal Holmes shot up from his chair and made his way in the direction of his room.

"Holmes," I called out before he had left the room completely.

"Yes Watson?"

"Happy Bbirthday old chap."

I did not need to see the face of my friend to know that I had surprised him. His body language gave it all away. For once my dearest friend had let down his usual cold facade. It was pleasing to know that I had surprised the master of deduction.

I could tell by just looking at Holmes that he was both pleasantly surprised and happy that I had figured out the mystery of January sixth.

"Thank you, my dear Watson."

I love how you ended it! Great work!