"Well stop going out and getting drunk with Ted and Bill!" My wife was screaming again. Her voice echoed in my head and was irritating me to the point of anger. I tried to ignore her but she kept nagging and nagging, like she wanted me to snap. My mind was splitting until finally... Crack.
"How bout' you stop fooling around with that guy from your office huh!" She got real quiet after that, "Dammit You never shut up! I get drunk because I know I have to come home to your ass!" That anger inside me... It was manifesting itself into my brain. I was feeling really strange. It was like something or someone was fighting me for control over my body. Finally I let go and fell into ecstasy with my demonic rage.
"So is that how you did it eh?" A policeman with a cigarette in his mouth and coffee in his hand said. I was getting lost in the story I forgot I was getting interrogated. Shit.
"Well hold on I'm getting to the good part if you'd just let me finish." I said very nonchalant.
She grabbed a pan from the kitchen and tried swinging it at me, the first hit me and dazed me but everything else was hitting the air. I went to her and threw her to the ground and started choking her. but I didn't feel it was giving me the satisfaction that my devilish mind craved so badly. I got up and grabbed a nice nine inch chef knife, just sharpened. Oh you don't know how happy I was when I heard her sweet little screams with every gash I tore into her. I really tried to savor it but she was just human and sadly died. Luckily our son was at his friends house spending the night there.
"Was it the neighbors that called you guys on me? Cuz' she was screaming really loud." I started to laugh.
"You think this shit is funny?" The cop slammed on the steel table.
"Oh no, not at all." I tried containing some of my giggles I had. So like I was saying, my kid is at his friends house. That's good because she spilt a whole lot of blood. It was on the drapes, the floor, it was everywhere. I had it all over my face i was thinkin' bout' washing it off but I kinda like how it looked on me. I was thinking about how to get rid of the body, acid, sea, chopped up, you know that good stuff.
"Oh and by the way did you ever find her body?"
"No," He said a little disappointed. "Tell me, Where did you hide it?"
Well there was only one way that I could think of that would get rid of it. I chopped her up in bite sized pieces and cooked her. She forgot to make dinner and I was hungry, It was a win win. But I couldn't eat all of her so I started to walk around the neighborhood until I heard a dog bark then I tossed small pieces over the fence to shut them up and get rid of her. Either they must've liked her or else I'm a good cook because they stopped yapping their mouths once I through it over. I kept nibbling on some of her while I was walking. Once I was all out I started heading back to MY house and there was two of YOUR people in there. I snuck to my shed and grabbed my shotgun. I used to use it to hunt game but I guess pig was alright too.
"That's it I've heard enough!" He shouted and grabbed his handcuffs and slapped them on my wrists.
"Hold up don't you want to know what happened to them? It's a happy ending at the end I promise you." He was looking at me disdainfully but sat me down again. "Boy your easy to convince" I laughed.
So I grabbed my 12 gauge and was crawling in my backdoor trying to be as quiet as I could. One went upstairs to "investigate" while the other stood downstairs looking at the bloody carpet. I ran up behind him and hit him with the butt of my shotgun and he fell like a sack of bricks. The other guy heard his thud though. But he didn't pull out his firearm and BOOM I shot him square in the chest. He rolled down the stairs and probably broke his neck when he was falling down the stairs. I bet the neighbors were feeling pretty scared once my shotgun went off. I remembered there was the one sleeping on my floor. I decided to give him a quick death he looked like a nice guy. Just a blast to the head was it. And then your other friends came and caught me watching t.v. And now we are here in this bright room and you breathing smoke in my face.
"Was that the happy ending? You killing two good cops and your wife? Oh your gonna get life buddy I'm going to make sure of that!"
"No the happy ending is that I get free" He laughed and grabbed my wrists. I swiftly rammed the back of my head into his making him lose his grip. I turned behind him and grabbed his gun shooting the handcuffs. I shot his foot then held him by the neck making sure he couldn't breath. At least ten cops busted into the room and drew their guns at me. I pointed it at his head now.
"I don't want to kill this guy but I will If you don't let me out."
"Just shoot him!" the cop was struggling to get out. I smacked him to shut up. I started to walk slowly towards the door and they all backed away.
"Now, everyone go to the left side." They stood on the wall I had to make sure none could get a clear shot so I kept moving my head behind his and walking faster. I saw the door but I had to hurry up before the cops crawl all over outside.
"Where are your keys?" I whispered in his ear. He spit on my cheek. I shot his knee, the other cops were ready to shoot. "Are you going to tell me?"
"Their in my right pant pocket."
"Was that so hard?" I grabbed the keys and opened the door behind me. "If any of you try to follow us I will blow his brains out!" I tried to run with him but he had a shattered knee. We got to the car and hit the gas making the tires screech. For two miles I didn't see them but I knew they were tracking me so I tried to look inconspicuous. I stopped at a deserted house and shot him in the back of the head with the seat to muffle the shot. I undressed and put on his clothes. The blood stains and hole in the pant leg could be covered up. I left him there and started walking towards a parking lot. Not much cars but it will do. I found one with the door unlocked and hotwired the car. I started driving down the road thinking about my beautiful dead wife and my poor son.
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